Leaving exclusively breastfed baby overnight for the first time

[Honeyhoney2]

This is a super preemptive post but it’s already stressing me out!

My husband has planned an overnight stay for us in London at a hotel in July to celebrate our one year wedding anniversary. We would be dropping our then 4 month old daughter off at my mums house on Saturday morning, and picking her up on Sunday morning. We plan to have my mum give her formula for that day and night as it’s easier for me/ there’s no pressure to pump enough milk before she goes there.

I have a couple of questions -

Should we be working on introducing the bottle and formula to my daughter pretty much now in preparation? If so, how do I not impact breastfeeding/ my supply too much in doing this? She’s never had a bottle or formula before.

And more importantly, I know I’ll need to pump whilst we’re away if anything for my own comfort, but is there a general
guideline of how many times to pump in order maintain supply and stay comfortable when away from ebf baby? Also I’m guessing I’ll need to pump and just throw the milk away which feels wrong, but I’m not sure how else I’d store it staying in a hotel and going all around London??

any suggestions would be really appreciated, sorry if any of these questions are dumb! I’m pretty anxious at the thought of my baby staying with my mum and not eating anything because she won’t take it… surely that won’t happen right?!

My son never ever took to a bottle. We tried spoon feeding, cup feeding you name it, we tried it and he just refused point blank to the point that there was a concern over him becoming dehydrated.

I would never have left him overnight anyway, my husband knew that is going away without him was a no go but it was an issue when I went back to work part time.

Give the bottle a go sooner rather than later but just enough to make sure your baby will take it. Bottles are much less of an effort for a baby than breast feeding so try to stop short of your little one getting too used to the bottle :)

My first born was ebf, but took bottles of BM interchangeably. I had a great supply, he wasn't confused by the bottle. I had no idea how awesome that was till ds 2 came along. I pumped fuck all. And he was a complete bottle refuser.

Could have left ds1 at 4 months, no bother. Ds2? Not a chance, unless the person looking after them didn't mind a completely sleepless night with a howling baby.

Make a flexible booking! That's my only advice. I hope you manage to get away, and have a fabulous time.

@Fernsinthegarden wow that is so true about the unconditional and conditional love! Thanks so much :)

@UmmWhatThe thank you for the recommendation! I’ll check it out

@User3568975431146 & @JuneOsborne Thank you for sharing, it definitely seems that it will depend entirely on how DD is with the bottle, I’m really glad I asked as if I’m being honest I was totally naive to this and thought she would take a bottle if it was the only option but I can see how that’s not necessarily the case! Thanks again, will definitely go with a booking that can be cancelled…

My baby is four months and EBF, he takes a bottle fine and we introduced it early with no nipple confusion or impact on breastfeeding. It worked best at first when his Dad gave it to him away from me.

Ive done a couple of trips where I'm away the whole day, and come back at 1am ish and it has been fine, although I was v nervous for the first one. My sister, cousins and friends have done the same and actual overnights or w/e's away. I also work a day a week in the office (we’re doing shared leave)

Tips I was given (and recommend) are 1) the Medela hand pump - it's about £20 and amazing. I use this more than my electric pump now 2) a little cool bag where you can put ice packs - I chuck this into a tote bag and you can pump anywhere in about ten mins. If you keep the pump cold and in a plastic sandwich bag, you can use it 2-3 times w/o sterilising inbetween. The cool bag also keeps the bottles of milk cold for 3-4 hours. 3) a hotel with a mini fridge ideally or, failing that, ask for a bucket full of ice to store your milk. This is a faff as you have to replace the ice. A fridge is a lot safer. 4) Milton tabs for easy sterilising (in a little mason jar or something) and a little bottle of decent washing up liquid to wash the pump. The medela hand pump only has a few bits that need washing/sterilising so it's not too faffy 5) wear breastfeeding friendly clothes for easy pumping on the go.

I’d try these out before, because they’re daunting the first time. Such as leave baby with Dad and go for dinner very nearby with a friend so you can test it out and get back v quickly if baby doesn’t settle / pumping isn’t easy etc.

have a lovely night away!

I have the same worry, my partner and I are going away overnight at the end of August. Our son is EBF and will be a little over 3 months the night were away. I have a frozen pumped stash ready to go and we've tried him with one bottle (MAM newborn bottle with 0 flow teat, paced feeding technique) last week which he took. I left the house and husband gave it to him, baby was unsure at first but I think paced feeding helped him accept it because you tickle their nose with the bottle teat like your nipple and they open wide for a deep latch.

We're going to offer a bottle once a week until we go so that it's not completely alien. And my mum is coming to our home to look after him the night we're away. We are also going to go out for an hour or two in the coming weeks and have mum come over to look after him as a trial run.

I know I will miss him terribly but as someone else has said, it will be good to have a break and spend quality time with your partner. Plus bonding time for grandparents!

I'm more worried about my mum not being able to console him like the boob does, he doesn't like a dummy either but deep down I know he'll be fine. Most (not all - don't come at me) babies are adaptable/will accept different methods of comfort from different carers.

I wouldn't let anyone make you feel guilty for going, there is enough mum guilt that comes with having a child but equally if you don't want to leave him, then have a chat about changing plans. Totally a personal thing.

Yes bottle refusal happens and it’s awful. I wouldn’t worry too much about the pumping question, and of course the formula is absolutely fine.
but the bottle question is REAL and urgent if you want to do this, you must start now! Younger the better.

I agree with all of this but midwife told me you have to use the bottle once a day, not once a week, to avoid bottle refusal

But then you've got the fear of bottle preference and messing up latch... Honestly each baby is so different, until you try you don't know. I know some mums who's babies refuse bottles, some take bottles and boob daily no problem, some take bottles whenever they are given them even if they are few and far between! It's a minefield and you've just got to go with your gut.

I introduced a bottle to all of my bf babies at 3 weeks and then DH would do the 10pm feed every night (and I went to bed early so I could get a long uninterrupted stretch). DH adored his alone time with the tiny babies and the sleepy feed just before they both came up to bed. It was a huge thing in their bonding. We tried to use expressed milk,but I wasnt very good at pumping, so eventually we just used formula. My supply was at its lowest by the end of the day, so it just ended up meaning I had a great supply for the middle of the night feed and they would feed quickly and be right back to sleep (win win)

i think your night away sounds like a lovely idea and well planned as its easy to get to your baby quickly if there are problems (which takes the stress out of it)