Nervous about baby #2

[HereComesBaby2]

Currently pregnant with a very much wanted baby #2 and suddenly feel so nervous about the prospect of having 2 children!

Baby was 100% planned and we are very excited to finally be pregnant after delaying TTC due to covid for a long while and then conception taking longer than we anticipated (I fell pregnant first cycle with DD)

My DD will be 3.5 by the time baby is here and I'm suddenly doubting myself as a mother, how will I cope with 2 etc. My DD has her moments where she is a handful and is also speech delayed which makes communication/potty training etc difficult.

My DP is a very hands-on dad so have lots of support there but obviously when he does back to work after paternity it'll just be me throughout the day.

I know I'm worrying for nothing and I will adapt when baby is here, please tell me your positive stories about managing and enjoying having 2 young children!

honestly everyone feels the same!

I even had doubts i could love 2 children, your love doesnt divide it multiplies!
I had a total meltdown when i was about 36 weeks pregnant thinking how on earth can i do this?! my LG was 4 at the time and i just felt like i couldnt juggle everything BUT YOU CAN!

I found it easier going from 1 to 2 then from 0 to 1 if im honest, you are more prepared and i found i didnt stress half as much with no.2 then i did with my first, think it also helped that my second LG was so chilled (nothing like my first!) and she just slotted in...

being organised is key and having support is fab, youve got this :-)

I'm currently cuddling my newborn while 3.5 year old ds is playing on the floor happily. I adore being a mum of 2.

Thanks for your lovely reassuring messages 😀

I can't wait to see my DD with the new baby and for us to grow our family, it's just such a big change isn't it!

I think what you're feeling is very normal.
You'll just adapt and muddle your way through because you have no choice. There will undoubtedly be difficult moments as you find your new routine but loads of lovely ones too. Does your DD go to nursery or pre-school? I'd recommend trying to sort some childcare so you have time just you & the baby. Don't stress about screen time either for your eldest

What you're feeling is very normal. Your situation sounds similar to mine in that my eldest has a speech delay. We have just over 3 year gap.

I won't lie, juggling the needs of 2 is tough but I'd still say going from 1-2 is easier than 0-1. You just have more realistic expectations second time round and it's less of a shock to the system.

If your eldest isn't in some sort of nursery/preschool, I would definitely recommend this. It brings a bit of balance to the week as finding activities that suit both children at this age can be quite tricky! Also with regards to the speech delay, I've struggled a lot with the guilt at not being able to give my eldest the 1:1 time I did before. He loves preschool though and they do so much with him that I couldn't possibly replicate at home.

Also my DH extended his paternity leave to 4 weeks this time with annual leave. Made a huge difference when breastfeeding in the early days if that's what you choose as he could take charge of the toddler.

Despite the challenges, absolutely nothing beats how much they truly adore each other and watching their relationship grow.

It is wonderful, but I would strongly, strongly suggest keeping (or putting) your toddler in nursery at least part of the week.

My DD will be in preschool by the time baby is here. Difficulty being that the preschool we want to put her in won't accept her if she isn't potty trained as they don't have the resources to be changing nappies. We were aiming for her to start in September but they said she can start in January if she isn't trained by then. Potty training isn't going well at all as I don't think she's ready (mostly due to speech delay) so I'm also worried she won't be ready in January either 😕

I don't think they're actually legally able to turn children away for not being potty trained...

I was in your position. We delayed TTC baby number 2 due to covid which gave me too much time to overthink and I got so worried about rocking the boat by having another child. So much so I almost decided to stick with one child.

Our baby is now 8 months old and it's honestly been amazing. The children adore each other and it brings a tear to my eye how complete our family is and how baby number 2 was always meant to be here. Its been better than I could ever have imagined. Yes there will be tricky parts with potty training and illnesses etc but honestly it won't matter. My heart is full.

Honestly you will do great, I am so happy for you, enjoy!

Oh, and same age gap here too. I think it's a brilliant age gap.

Following. Baby 2 due in September and DS Will be 2.5!

Hi everyone! I feel far less nervous now that everything has sunk in, I'm trying to focus on how nice it will be for my DD to have a sibling and how I am lucky to have a lot of support from my DP and family to make the transition easier.

How are you feeling @Whatelsecouldibecalled?