Not gender disappointment as such…

[Cinnabomb]

Ok please don’t tear me to shreds…. Not really sure why I’m posting as I know these always go down badly.

2nd and likely last pregnancy, just found out we are having a boy, already have DD. I’m suddenly so so sad about not having another daughter. Not so much disappointed it’s a boy, just that it’s not a girl, if that makes sense? Really sad packing up the baby girls clothes etc

might be as DH has made it abundantly clear already that he would never consider a 3rd.

I know I’m very lucky to have healthy children, we actually had fertility problems, losses and horrendous prev pregnancy/ birth/ NICU/ DD nearly died etc so please don’t lecture me about not knowing how lucky I am! I know IABU just not sure why I suddenly feel this way when I didn’t care before the scan!

I get this. When I had my second I was delighted that my ds would have a brother but ever so slightly sad that I would never have a daughter.

If I had found I was having a girl
I would have felt the same in reverse.

I have a pre-teen DS and a DD, about 2.5 years apart. They get along well for the most part, they make each other laugh - but most importantly, I can see them gaining valuable experience in how to deal with the opposite sex. DD has learned to stand up to her brother in a way that will probably stand her in good stead in the future. And DS is able to be friends with girls, which I suspect he wouldn't feel confident with if he didn't have that grounding.

I felt exactly the same when pregnant with my ds. I got over it pretty quickly when he was born and I'm so so in love with him and now really happy that I have them both. He is definitely my last. I'm under no illusion that they will probably fight like cat and dog when older but for now, the love they have for each other is so lovely to see. They already have this amazing bond.

I wonder whether it's because you love your DD1 and find her amazing and a boy is more unknown IYSWIM? I think often when pregnant the sex is something one can easily focus on/obsess over as it's the one thing we know about them already then- whereas their personalities, quirks etc that we later end up loving only become known after their birth.

I have 9 I can absolutely tell you its about personality not sex as to how well they get on. Some of the best friendships mine have are between opposite sex siblings. They all kind of get on and as they move through ages & stages their preferred siblings changes but the closest are not the same sex.

I so agree with this. Boys get such a hard time, as if their the booby prize. When I found out I was having my 3rd i endured so much negativity from complete strangers on a daily basis when asked the sex and if I had others
"That's a shame", "o dear", "what did you do wrong", "you'll have to try again", "they'll leave you when your older"
I just wondered if you got the same?

I have both brothers and sisters. It's not the sisters I get on with the best. In fact, one sister can be down right nasty. Neither brother has ever been as vindictive.

@cinabomb thank you for posting this. I recently found out I am having a DS. Already have a 2 year old DD and feel a bit sad, because I've experienced myself and also known brothers and sisters who do not get along. I guess from now going forward from my part, I am just going to do some more reading so I can support in forming that closer bond in the longer term and might work or might not.

I have a boy and a girl and so happy to have one of each! I have a brother and a sister and have always had a closer relationship with my brother. No guarantee two girls will get along

@Agapita84 my DS is now 18 months and I absolutely adore him. He is just such a delight, and has been 1000% times easier than his sister ever was 🤣 they seem to get along really well given their ages, play together and I wouldn’t change anything for the world.