Tips to survive 4 month sleep regression

[BaliBabe]

Sorry if I seem a bit dramatic. After a month of being in this - last night was by far the worst.

DS is 4 months old (this started around the time he was 3 months though) and has been waking every 1/2 hours needing to be settled then at the end of the night only wanting to sleep on me.

the past few nights he’s only slept on me, meaning I am getting no sleep. DH is on nights so luckily I get some break in the day but he needs sleep too so I’ve only had a nap or two.

Any tips please?? There seems to be no end in sight. We have a routine in place I don’t know what else I can do

What really worked for me was the pick-up-put down method.

Basically I would put my daughter in her crib drowsy but awake, and as soon and she started crying would pick her up to cuddle/soothe her. As soon as she was calm/relaxed (but very importantly NOT asleep), I would put her back down. She would usually start crying again immediately and so I would do the same again, and continue over and over until she would eventually just grumble a bit when I put her down and go to sleep. It took about 15 put-downs each time to begin with (so possibly as many as 100x through the course of the first night) but I was completely consistent in doing this every single time and gradually over about 2 weeks the number of put-downs decreased until eventually I could put her down and she would accept it first time. It does take stamina and complete commitment as if you are at all inconsistent it won't work.

With this technique I never had to leave her to cry for even a second, there was no restriction on when/ how much I could sooth her. She still wakes up regularly overnight and will cry for me if she needs her nappy changed, is hungry, just wants a cuddle etc, but what she doesn't do is cry purely on the basis that she is in her cot/ doesn't want to be put down as she knows that doesn't really pay off and she won't get to just sleep on me.

I found it doesn't stop her from waking up, but she is usually back down within 10 mins as she accepts being put in her cot now instead of fighting it, and sometimes when she wakes up she will just quie

Quietly shuffle around her cot and go back to sleep if there's nothing she needs

We've done a very similar method to this. Some call it 'self soothing' but it's all the same - putting them down drowsy but not asleep so they learn to drop off themselves. It's NOT the same as 'cry it out' method where you let them properly cry/scream, as previous poster said you don't leave to to cry, you go back in to settle them/give them a cuddle but put them back down again. Keep repeating and eventually they get it (if they're just grumbling and not 'properly' crying I used to leave DC for longer as they weren't distressed).

We started this about the 4 month mark too, can't remember how long it took to master but I definitely remember by month 6 (when DC went into their own room) she was going to sleep happily by herself and sleeping through. It really helps them sleep through as you've taught them to go to sleep themselves, rather than cry for you.

Hang in there, you're not alone, so many of us have been through this and it does get better. Good luck x x

@pbdr he cries and I won’t ever leave him to cry so I pick him up x

Thank you I think I need to be more persistent with pick up put down, I do it but have gave up after 3-5 tries as I’m exhausted but I’ll take some red bull up with me tonight persist I think!

@SunshineAndFizz

ps @pbdr ignore my last reply I seen your username for the 2nd comment didn’t realise it was a follow on from the first!🤦🏻‍♀️Thank you for the advice xx