may well be imposible to asnwer this objectively, but: is there a 'best' age for a child to be away from his/her mum, at nursery/pre-school/whatever

[Tutter]

it probably also depends on the child, i know

but wondering whta the mn concensus would be

so... if all factors (financial, time, etc) meant you could choose freely, when would you prepare your child for school?

would anyone wait until school proper starts i wonder?

Pros and cons for different ages so impossible to answer (and v easy for this to kick off!)

Three seemed to be the turning point for DD1, she really clicked with the social side of nursery then. Previous times she was unhappy to be left really. DD2 went to nursery at three quite happily too.

when the child wants to go.

Likely to be somewhere between 3 and never, partly depending on whether there are older siblings already happy in school.

Also depends how early they are with language, how confident with non-family adults and large grioups of same age children, how docile and biddable they are, how happy they are spending a large part of the day on someone else's timetable, whether they are confident with independent toilet use, how long they sit still happily...

dislaimer: I'm an advocate of home ed, when that is preferred by the child.

when they're ready

DD was 2.8 when she went to pre-school full time. It was far too early as far as I was concerned (I'd keep her home with me now if it was up to me and she's 4.5!!) but she was ready (she's naturally very sociable) and loved it from the start. As you say, it does depend on the individual.

Prior to that she had spent one or two mornings at week at creche, staying a whole day on two or three occasions, so starting pre-school wasn't too difficult an adjustment (we live abroad so there were language issues) but good for any child to have gradual progression I think.

From a different perspective, I stayed at home with my mother until I was almost five. I was the youngest of four and so spent quite a lot of time inside the house. Consequently, starting full-time school for me was a huge shock to the system and quite traumatic. Gentle steps best I think.

Should add it was mornings only for the first year. That seemed a good compromise.

Dd started nursery at 7.5 mo but really I think the best time would have been about 2ish. I think she does get some benefit from nursery - but not so much that she actually needs to go if I didn't need the time.

both my daughters went to nursery at 7-8 mths, 3 days a week, which worked really well for us. no way would i have waited till school, all of us would have been climbing the walls.