When did you decide on DC2?

[littlelegs23]

DD is 6 months old. I know I definitely want another, would like a small age gap.

DP is a bit nervous and keeps saying let’s wait and see what happens. I am hoping he’ll come round in the future

When I’ve mentioned this comment to family/friends they have all said it’s quite normal for a man to feel this way for a bit as women (if they take maternity) get more time with DC to look after them and seem to know what they’re doing more etc

were you in a similar position?

When did you DP’s come round to another baby?

I got pregnant within a few hours of deciding to go for a second one! DH agreed to start trying because we wanted them close together and getting pregnant the first time took ages so we thought we'd just get on with it. DC1 was 7 months when we tried for DC2 and 16 months when DC2 was born.

It took longer to get DH to agree to try for DC3, I think he agreed eventually for a quiet life because he knew how much I wanted another one.

Pretty much straight after DC1. I always wanted two, and a small age gap. There's 18 months between my DCs and I had a miscarriage in between them.

We knew we wanted two relatively close together, but made the decision we were ready for it after DD's first massive vomiting bug having started nursery. We were all massively poorly, every towel we owned was in the wash because she'd been sick on it, I had vomit in my hair and we were all lying on the bed, her asleep and us both awake. He turned to me and said: "So this is pretty much the grimmest, worst part of parenting so far. It's just horrible." I thought he was going to have an uncharacteristic but understandable moan. Then he said even feeling rubbish he had no regrets and would happily do it again. So we did.

I’d ideally like to start TTC when DD is 18 months old

so a year away but I’m worried DP won’t come around - hopefully the baby stage has just scared him a little and he will??

he says he feels like he’s a bad dad (he struggles to settle her) and worries about it again. Hopefully his confidence will build and he’ll come round to it

We agreed before we got married that we would try to have at least two children. We left open the question of whether we would have a third.

The gap between them was not planned. We (deliberately) didn't use contraception after the first was born so it just happened when it happened.

We decided before the second was born that we wouldn't have a third. I would have liked another but I was 38 when the second was born and my husband was 49. Heads won over heart!

Wow, I find that outlook impressive! It's those moments that have me seriously questioning my life choices 😆

I second this - extremely impressive!

i hope DP’s mindset changes to this 😆

OP I don't have advice on having a second, but my husband also felt like a bad dad at that age. He couldn't settle her and felt like he couldn't do anything right. Small babies often just want mum (or just cry a lot no matter what!). Our DD is now 15 months and my husband has a great bond with her, and is so much more confident as a dad now that she can express what she wants a bit more.