How does anyone get anything done with a toddler around?

[manysummersago]

I am absolutely drowning in things that need doing - some more pressing than others - and I really am feeling stressed, tearful and overwhelmed with it all at the moment, and feeling a bit of resentment towards said toddler which is horrible.

Are there any easy fixes for this or am I just going to have to accept it either won’t get done or DS will be ignored?

Very slowly! Or with the occasional help of ceebies. If they still nap then during nap time.

Tv, iPad, when they nap 🤷‍♀️ Things need to be done so just have to get one with it

Mine just follows me round even with the TV on!

I get stuff done during the evening when they are asleep. Bug stuff just gets added to the never ending list until I cave and take a day of annual leave whilst he's at nursery!

Also, you could get your toddler involved in little stuff- loading the washing machine, give them a cloth when you are dusting, their own little washing up bowl.

Depending on the job you can try getting him involved. It takes 3 times as long but at least it gets done! If they're the younger end of toddlerhood do it during nap time. At the older end so long as his safe and it's not for long periods, I think it's good for children to learn that they can't have your attention all the time.

How old is said toddler? Mine is 18 months and loses interest in the TV after about five mins too - terrible to say, but I am really looking forward to the day when she's interested enough in Cbeebies to be distracted by it for 30 mins at a time. In the meantime - naptimes, evenings, when her dad's watching her or on my lunch break at work is when stuff gets done. If I was single parenting or didn't have my toddler free days at work then very little would ever happen so I'm aware I have it easier than some!

Same @houseargh - mines 16 months and just wanders off from the TV.

Trying to mark some exercise books and DS is THERE, in my face, trying to climb on me and grab the pen. Try to phone the doctor and DS is prodding the phone and trying to hang up I put some clothes away and it takes over an hour as DS is roaming around and falling and wailing …

I do love him but in a bit of a flustered mood. Far too much to do and just can’t get it done.

Maddening isn’t it. I felt like that most of the first lockdown as my youngest was that age and I was trying to homeschool older children. Keep trying with the TV!
Could he go to nursery for a morning/day?

This might sound odd but have you tried cocomelon 😅 my 2yo was not interested in TV until she discovered that show, it mesmerises her! Mines not interested in toys either so if I'm desperate to get something done that I can't do during naptime or with her following me, I pop cocomelon on and it mostly works a charm.

He goes to nursery in term time but is with me for the holiday <strained smile> god knows how you coped in lockdown!

I am normally a bit more patient but am having an exceptionally stressful few days.

@manysummersago the thing that has actually made the biggest difference for us is moving our dinner earlier to eat with her. We all eat together around 6.30, then one of us does the dishes and tidies up while the other does bedtime (we're both there for the story/last ten mins). She goes down at 8. So then from 8pm we're free to do life admin / other tasks / veg in front of Netflix / whatever. It feels like we have way more baby-free time compared to when we used to put her down at 7 but then had to cook and eat dinner and do the dishes after bedtime. This schedule works for us because she's a horribly early riser so a relatively late bedtime works (I don't think we'd be able to eat together if she was going down at 7). But maybe worth thinking about whether you can tweak your schedule to free up some more time in the evenings?

Ah - I get no time in the evening as I have to go to bed more or less when DS does as his sleep is shit!

Why don't you put them in a playpen or push chair/pram?

If it's safe you could put the pram in the back garden. I think this is how previous generations got on with chores.

Do it all when he's napping.

Either that or second the Cocomelon advice!!

It sounds like you're maybe trying to do some actual work though, rather than just humdrum domestic stuff, which is totally impractical and got nightmare written all over it, sorry OP

Ahem not that I'm suggesting for a minute that domestic stuff is not actual work!! I just meant that marking etc involves a level of mental focus that is not possible when a toddler's around, in my experience. Whereas I can get a bit of hoovering done if mine's in a tolerant mood...

I would work through the night when my DC were toddlers. I was often tired by their bed time, and their sleep was appalling but that fact gave me 24 hours to work with which actually helped, eg I might sleep early then be up with them anyway so may as well work. Sometimes during the day I would put them in a carrier on my back to get my work done. I would often work during mealtimes when they were in their high chair. Work if they fell asleep in the day. Work while they watched TV or if we went somewhere I’d work on the bus or train on the way there and back instead of driving. I mastered reading and walking at the same time with the books on the hood of the pushchair, and did a lot of phone calls and walking (eg strap them in and go for a walk, phone the doctors whilst walking). Do you have any friends with little ones similar ages? I used to have a few where we’d meet up and one of us would watch children while the other did something they needed to then swap. It’s a hard phase, it will end, but my way was all about snatching every opportunity possible to work.

I absolutely hated doing household tasks with toddler in a tow, you know all those fantastic suggestions of loading a washing machine together and letting them help you fold stuff. It’s a bloody nightmare and I don’t have the patience to spend 60 minutes on a task that should take 5.
I got through by doing things in the evening, rarely at nap times as I slept myself. House was a mess and a big pile of laundry waiting, garden neglected and generally doing the bare minimum. Cooking very basic, quick meals.
By 2,5years it’s back to normal.

I'm so glad someone said this. I don't know how anyone has the patience, I would go completely mad. I need to get things done!

We used a travel cot as a playpen until around 2. Mine was 13 months when we went into lockdown, so we were trying to work - can't really get a baby to help with emails 😂 Otherwise naptimes and evening, and I definitely still use annual leave to get stuff done with a three year old.

I have 1 year old twins - you just get them to help in their own way - with the ironing I stick a basket on the floor of the washing and they'll amuse themselves taking in and out and sticking it in their heads. Cleaning I'll give them a cloth each. You just have to be creative and not afraid of a bit of mess / them "helping" - if I didn't involve them in things I'd never get household stuff done

Don't be hard on yourself. Give yourself a few days off the jobs and go out with the little one.
Focus on what you can do. If you haven't got time to do the dishes just stack them up for after they are in bed

If you haven't got time to put all the washing away just put your clothes away

Baby steps in the right direction. .