Child's 3rd party

[ItTakesTwo121]

Hello, not sure is this is the right topic but will try.

My son has been invited to a 3rd birthday party and I'm not sure if he should go.

For context- it's at a soft play and he hates soft play. He was born with a deformity to his foot so he never feels quite safe on his feet yet. When we took him to soft play at Christmas he got really scared and didn't want to go in even with us there with him.

We tried him on a bouncy castle last week and again he hated it. We think it's because he doesn't feel safe on his feet.

The invite doesn't say much about whether parents should stay or not.
I'm worried if he goes and he hates it he will cry ti go home.

He isn't especially friends with the child, they have just invited a selection from nursery group.

I don't know what to do

If he doesn't want to go, don't go! Don't stress too much about it.

If he does want to go you would definitely definitely be expected to stay!!

At age three the parents will all stay I'd imagine, I certainly did at my daughters nursery parties!
If he gets upset you can easily take him home, I'm sure the parents will be understanding.
Or if he really won't like it it's probably not worth putting him through it, just reply saying you can't make it?

If you think he'll hate it and there's no kind of social obligation to go, don't go!

I don't think any parent wants to be responsible for a bunch of three year olds they barely know at a soft play place though, so am sure they'll be expecting the parents to stay, yes.

Parents definitely stay at 3. Some parents start leaving their dc at 5th birthday parties but not before that. If he won't like it don't take him though. My 14 year-old is autistic and we declined all disco parties because he hated them.

Thank you everyone, I'm glad you have all cleared up the staying as no mention on invite.

I know my husband will say just go but it's not him that has to be there when he is frightened and then have to leave as not sure if that would be a little rude if his place is paid for.

It's hard when he finds uneven surfaces scary as he doesn't feel safe.

I think I might politely decline this party and hope he is invited to others in the future. The mum is really nice and not cliquey at all so I'm sure she will be fine.

Assuming he is also 3 don't base his reaction going forward on something that happened in December. Kids change all the time and the more exposure he has the more he will build confidence. I'd risk it by taking him abs if he hates it he can watch from the side and enjoy other aspects of the party - cake / food / seeing his friends. Seems a bit ott not to take him based on one bad experience many months back. If he has hated soft play 3/4/5 times then sure... but once?

Just decline. It will be fine.

Parents staying hasn’t been said on the invite because at that age it definitely goes without saying. It’s only KS1 when parents stopped routinely staying for parties and even then, some still did.