Can I baby wear all day?

[Mads199]

I have a one month old - a very, very fussy one month old. We are a sleep deprived house right now, no chores are done, the place is a mess, and I’m barely hanging on by a thread with the constant crying and feeding (EBF).

The only, and I mean ONLY thing that gets my baby to go to sleep right now is the baby carrier. I have an ergobaby 360 which we splashed the cash on in a desperate attempt to make something work and luckily it did.

But how long can I wear her in it? Is it awful for her to be in it pretty much all day? Nights are a different beast, me and my husband have to take shifts to sleep, but in the day I’m home alone with the baby as husband is in the office, and I think I’d go mad without just the couple of hours of quiet that baby carrying gets me here and there. Can I do her any damage to her by having her in the carrier for long periods of time? It seems quite restrictive but at the same time I’m guessing the closeness/ hearing my heartbeat on my chest is what she needs at the moment to feel calm.

Also, as a side note, please someone tell me that we are in the thick of it right now and things SHOULD start getting better from around 6 weeks? I keep seeing 3 months thrown around as the time it gets better, but christ alive, I think I’ll lose the will to live if it takes that long! I know every baby is different, I think I’m just clutching at straws lol. I desperately don’t want to wish these early days away but this is so, so difficult.

Not sure about actual time limits but I think she'll likely be fine in it for fairly long periods if she's in the healthy hip position (M shaped)? The manufacturer's website might have advice on time limits?

For the second part of your post, from my own experience things improved MASSIVELY from 5/6 weeks and have just kept getting better ever since (DS is now 5mo), I remember about 3-4 weeks being really tough. Our HV advised us to do what we needed to do to maximise our sleep and survive those early days and she was absolutely right!

If it helps, we used to sleep in shifts too. Then at about 5 weeks DS started sleeping in about 3-4 hour chunks overnight which felt way more manageable. By 8 weeks he'd just wake twice for feeds, and by 3 months only once. It felt like a spa break compared to the early days! Hang in there!

Wear your baby as much as you want. At this ages it is good for her.

Do you swaddle at night? I found a tight swaddle made a big difference to sleep with my equally clingy first baby.

And hang in there, it will improve

My third child lived in the sling or my bed and seems fine! Hang in there.

Double check your baby doesn’t have ( silent) reflux OP.. this upright position may be soothing them more than you realise xx

She's fine once she's positioned correctly in it.

Why are you sleeping in shifts at night?

Ours had CMPA and was like this. Worth investigating allergies, reflux etc.

Buggies (because it keeps them flat) are certainly better if she will tolerate this at all?

It does get better, just takes time (and cutting out dairy in our case).

Speak to your HV and NCT etc for advice and support.

Remember not to fall asleep (or lie down if you're feeling tired) with her in the carrier, it's really dangerous.

Yes, I carried DS1 for about 18 hours a day and he’s a happy, healthy strapping teenager now.

I found a long woven wrap to be more comfortable for both of us because you can adjust the position a bit easier and use different carries for different situations. And particularly for a back carry so you can more easily get things done (if you want to).

I have a 3 month old now and yes it is easier, but it hasn't only just become easier - so yeah, I don't think you have to wait this long! I remember those days. I still struggle to get baby to nap without me but he does sleep in his crib at night and has done for many weeks now (he managed a 7 hour stretch of sleep last night!!). In the day I do still have him in the carrier to get stuff done but as he's so alert now I can also place him in his bouncer, baby gym etc. whilst he plays/looks at toys

My HV at one point asked if dd2 was ever out of the sling I said yes, for feeds and changes, but that we were both a lot happier when she was in it, so that’s how she spent her days. No issues at all, though do check the TICKS safe babywearing list. And she grew out of it, and started napping in her cot etc once she was a bit bigger.

My dd lived in the sling! Not sure if a sling might be a bit better for all day than a carrier though? As it’s less structured?

My fussy baby didn’t get any better until 5months and it broke me. Not trying to worry you but just to say that if it doesn’t improve by 3 months it will eventually and we definitely seemed to be one of the longer ones I’ve heard of - for most it seemed to get better around 6 weeks like you say.

It will get better. My DS was only ever happy in the sling as a newborn. He was an awful sleeper: he's now 5 and loves his own bed and is a dream sleeper!

Enjoy the snuggles

I used a wrap for most of my babies waking hours. I also breastfed in the wrap which really helped, especially with my second. When they get older and they don't want to be in our for so long when awake, they'll let you know!

I still use it at 3&4 though, but not as much these days obviously.

As for it getting easier, it gets different. Some bits get easier, others get harder. There is often a sweet spot when they are a few months old, where you've really got the hang of parenting, but before they get mobile, that's pretty easy.

As others have said maybe speak to your GP in case baby has CMPA or silent reflux.
DD was exactly the same, wanted to be held all the time and has silent reflux. Meds really help.

We have the Ergobaby sling too but we couldnt use it until DD reached the minimum weight which i think is 9lb? (Poss even 7lb i cant remember).
She was tiny at birth and couldnt use it until almost 3 months old.

I have no advice but just wanted to offer sympathies. My son was the same when he was small - sleeping in shifts, never put down etc - it got a bit better once he could roll independently - he was much happier on his tummy due to his issues. Hang on in there xx