Visitors, newborn and covid

[twinkle1990]

Sorry if this has already been done, I am an old mumsnetter but having another (surprise!) baby, so I have found my way back recently ;)

My question is - what are mums of newborns doing about visitors with the covid cases being so high? We initially said lft test before you come and visit us (which kicked up a bit of a stink already 🙄)

But to complicate it - my SIL has now tested positive for covid (BIL and DN1 had it less than a month ago, but SIL and DN2 somehow managed to avoid it). I'm being induced at the weekend and I know everyone will want to be round pretty quickly to see her. I have spoken to SIL and she's being sensible and said she will wait for the 10 days to be up - but what do I do about the rest of their family if they want to come?

Also my FIL cancelled a sleepover with my nieces yesterday so he could still see baby when she's born, which I was really grateful for - but turns out he's gone to go and look after nieces today?? Im actually quite upset at this as it feels like an unnecessary risk (for himself too, not just for a newborn baby), which they acknowledged by themselves was an issue yesterday, but the staying away as lasted less than a day 🙈

It's going to cause arguments if we say no he can't come and visit for a while, but I feel he's already made his choice and it's not worth the risk to baby?

Incase it's important - I had covid less than a month ago for the first time (as well as the rest of our family) and its really knocked me about, even double vaccinated and boosted. Everyone else was fine.

I’m due to give birth soonish and doing nothing personally, for me the covid risk is small enough now that for most people it’s just like getting a cold so I’m not bothered about keeping people at a distance. My first baby was born at the start of the very first lockdown and we missed so much in terms of new baby visits

but turns out he's gone to go and look after nieces today?? Im actually quite upset at this as it feels like an unnecessary risk (for himself too, not just for a newborn baby)

I think this is quite unfair tbh

I don’t have a newborn, my DS has just turned 1. He has had covid recently and he’s been really poorly with it - high temperature and generally ill/crying/clingy for over a week.

So just wanted to say don’t let anyone make you feel like you’re being precious by being cautious.

Is it possible to meet in the garden if the weather is okay and baby is wrapped up warm?

Our son was born in Oct last year and we were soooo careful with who we saw for the first 4 months really. Some family still haven't met him. I felt bad at the start but then the baby is the most important and it's your job to protect them however you feel is right. If you want them to meet her let them, if you want to wait tell them. If they don't agree it's their problem, you're the parent and what you decide goes. If you let them change your mind on seeing them and then the baby got covid how would you feel? It's completely up to you and your DP and only you.

I’m finding the responses here really refreshing, as I’ve always tried to be very careful about covid with my now 10 month old, whereas my SIL has been completely the opposite with her 9 month old and it’s often made me feel like I’m being OTT. It’s a very strange thing to have to basically ask people to stay away because you’re worried they might have something and pass it on to the baby, but that’s the reality. While pregnant and when DS was a newborn I tormented myself with how I was going to ask people to behave in certain ways to protect us, and always felt like I was being OTT and annoying, but at the end of the day, your baby is the most precious thing in the world to you, so you do what feels right to you and if that means asking people to stay away until you can be completely confident there’s no risk then that’s that. If people are miffed that’s their issue x

Do what you are comfortable with, do not feel pressured into doing anything else. We have all had covid recently and even fully vaccinated and healthy it knocked my husband and me out for a couple of days. Would have been exhausting if we had a newborn to look after too. My DS who is a toddler and breastfed still had a nasty temperature with it, although he was fine. I definitely would not fancy catching it with a newborn unnecessarily.

Also there are so many other infections I would rather a newborn didn't catch so young too + you need to be able to rest yourself rather than host loads of visitors.

Personally I would say limit visitors to what you can easily cope with and do what you are comfortable with regarding infection risk. We were in lockdown when my son was born, so less of an issue, but currently I might perosnally say something like: only fully vaccinated visitors with a negative LFT before + no one with any cold/infectious symptoms or who has recently been a close contact of someone they know had covid. All to wash hands before holding baby of course. I would also probably try to limit visitors just so you can rest, get used to breasteeeding (if you want to breastfeed) ect. I actually think lock down helped me with breastfeeding, DH and I could just spend the time getting used to things without having to host lots of visitors, we just had my parents who were in our support bubble.

If people are upset that really is their issue, although I am sure it comes from a place of love and excitement for you and the baby. Personally I would just say you are so happy they want to meet your baby, but need to think of the baby's health and are really excited to introduce them to your baby when it is possible.

Our baby was born June 2020. We had a few visitors and asked people to wear masks and sanitise. I also wrapped baby in a big muslin that was washed after visits. Also lots of garden visits. Windows open etc

Do what you feel comfortable with.

I was super anxious but looking back I wish I had let people in more. It’s time and memories I won’t get back.

Well looking back on my post-lockdown baby experience I have no regrets. She didn't care who got to see her for the first month (just our parents) and that they wore masks, took tests and were blasted by all the doors open . No one else's feelings mattered to us, our priority was protecting our prem baby. All our family and friends were very supportive.

We still only let people who have taken tests and wear masks hold her by the way and she's 9 months soon. Your baby your rules!

We just asked that no one visited if they felt unwell like any other illness. Tbh most people tested before they came but we didn't ask them to. He was born summer last year. I never asked anyone to wear masks either. Do what you are comfortable with, people will get over it and if they don't well tuff for them😁

I had my little boy 5 weeks ago and had all of our families over the weekend after he was born (came home Thursday & had people round Sat/Sun the same week). The only person who done an LFT was my FIL as he lives in London (everyone else lives in Dorset so lower case rates) and he visits multiple buildings a day with his job as a heating engineer including schools. We did ask him if he would do one and he had already planned to but he done them during my pregnancy when i seen him too.

My husband had moaned at him a couple of times when he came to visit with a cold and gave it to me both times so this might have been the reason why he done it.

I’m not pregnant yet, but if I manage it will be LFT before coming. No one should be visiting a newborn if they feel unwell, but if they were silly enough to show up when sick I’d have no problems turning them away.