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How to deal with 4 yo behaviour

2 replies

SecondhandTable · 10/04/2022 19:54

My DD will be 4 in the summer. She's always been 'high needs', 'spirited' whatever you want to call it. However as she's aging obviously her behaviour is becoming more complex and I feel like I have no idea how to deal with it sometimes. Nothing I try really seems to have any positive outcome. So I'm just interested to hear what other people would do. Some of the many many many massive meltdowns we've had recently:

  • Refusing to eat meals that I know she likes, and tantrumming for a 'snack'
  • Kicking me/my chair at the dinner table
  • Throwing toys around when she's angry, sometimes aiming them at me
  • Following me around hitting and grabbing me when I'm trying to ignore her tantrumming
  • Waking up multiple times a night and then asking for loads of things and screaming and shouting if me/DH try to tell her it's time to sleep and not have a chat about x/ no we wont do Y as she can do it herself (e.g. 'j want a drink' when her water bottle is on her bedside table but she screams and shouts and wants us to pass it to her...).

I could go on and on...

For some additional context we also have a 6 mo son. DD is absolutely fantastic with him and adores him. The night time and bedtime issues I feel she's been getting away with a lot more than she used to just because we are worried about her disturbing her brother (who sleeps in our bedroom, but it's a fairly small terraced house and she has a frankly migraine-inducing ear-splitting scream), which does happen fairly frequently.

Help!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
ThirdElephant · 10/04/2022 20:10

There's a book called, 'How to talk so little kids will listen' that I cannot recommend enough. It's been a game-changer for us. It's also available on audiobook. No magic bullets, but tools and strategies that work very rapidly and can be used with older kids too.

goodhairdays · 30/06/2024 19:44

Just wondered if you found any strategies to help deal with your DD's behaviour? I literally could have written this post myself, DD is 5 in September and her behaviour just seems to be going from bad to worse, I am drained. nothing we do or say has any effect on her at all and she basically just laughs at us.

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