Active discussions

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Parenting

For free parenting resources please check out the Early Years Alliance's Family Corner.

Original poster

Screamy baby

9 replies

Sillymummies123 · 10/04/2022 05:41

Hi all,

My second born is lovely, giggly, smiley, until she's not. She is 7 months now and up to about 4 months the colic was extreme. 7pm-11pm every night was non-stop screaming. Thank god, it stopped. But her screaminess has remained.

I don't think she's ever taken milk without a thrashing, arching, red faced 10-15 minutes of screaming before begrudgingly accepting. And that's only if I'm around! When I work or have some time away, grandmother/sister/DH can't get a drop into her she protests so much! It was so bad the only time DH and I tried to get a whole day away that she didn't have a drop of fluid or food from 11am to 7pm.

It's also hard because she does not like cuddling. Once she decides she's tired there's nothing I can do but either rock her while she trashes and screams for about 15 minutes or put her down in her cot where she thrashes and screams for 15 minutes. I don't think she's unwell because when she's neither hungry or tired she's quite chilled and sits in the floor playing with all nearby toys. She also makes excellent eye contact and smiles/laughs so I'm not initially concerned about any developmental delay, she just gets so worked up. As I say - feeds and sleep have never been without extreme protest (family are shocked by the intensity of her screams, its like she's being tortured) and cuddling / attempts to sooth only seem to make her worse / no better.

Any advice for parents with similar babies would be appreciated/ reassurance that it gets better

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
romdowa · 10/04/2022 06:00

Could your dc have silent reflux?

MsChatterbox · 10/04/2022 06:19

Have you ever had her checked for a milk allergy?

Newuser82 · 10/04/2022 06:51

I was going to suggest milk allergy also.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

6-9 months old Babies & sleep Families General parenting
Original poster
Sillymummies123 · 10/04/2022 06:52

Hi there,

No signs of milk allergy, though we have an allergy appointment for suspected egg allergy so they can do skin prick there. I don't think it's reflux. Only in the sense that there's no pattern to it that would suggest reflux- it's like she's triggered by being cuddled/.attempts to feed / sleepy time. She came out screaming after my section. She kept the whole ward up, while all the other babies were sleeping. I think it's her nature but am willing to take any advice and, again, reassurance from anyone with a similar baby. Wine

OP posts:
Oatsamazing · 10/04/2022 07:31

My DD was the same, she had reflux but the screaming continued until she self weaned from breastfeeding at 15 months. I used to feed her to sleep (sometimes rock) and she would thrash about, with occasional screaming, until she eventually fell asleep. I haven't figured it out but I've read some children need to cry or need movement to fall asleep so have thought that might be it. She's 18 months now and throws herself about in bed before finally falling asleep (we sit with her until she does. She has a floor mattress in a play pen as I couldn't never get her into a cot. Sometimes I gently pat her on the back with a pillow which seems like a substitute for her movement but doesn't always work. It's very frustrating, hope it gets easier for you soon Flowers

unicornpower · 10/04/2022 07:41

Is she in pain when she’s feeding? Is it breastmilk or formula? I only ask because my baby has CMPA and she would do that with formula and then vomit horrendously and be constipated for days! It’s really brutal.

My baby isn’t a cuddler either and I find it really hard, she doesn’t scream as such but she yells and writhes around until I put her on the floor again. She will only tolerate a cuddle if she’s hurt herself or is poorly (she’s 7 months)

Original poster
Sillymummies123 · 10/04/2022 08:36

@unicornpower

Is she in pain when she’s feeding? Is it breastmilk or formula? I only ask because my baby has CMPA and she would do that with formula and then vomit horrendously and be constipated for days! It’s really brutal.

My baby isn’t a cuddler either and I find it really hard, she doesn’t scream as such but she yells and writhes around until I put her on the floor again. She will only tolerate a cuddle if she’s hurt herself or is poorly (she’s 7 months)

Hi there. It's hard to tell.

With the colic, she would scream 7+ hours a day for 3 months. She screams when it's time to feed. She's 100% hungry, but its like she's traumatised by the thought of actually feeding. It's horrible, but what choice is there? If i don't persist with holding gently, and offering her the occasional bottle she would get worse and not drink. I'm hoping that she'll be okay in that regard when she's weaned. She's already eating puree and tries finger food (she chewss, but drops most of it anyway), but she still has her episodes. I think she struggles with the feeling of hunger. In my heart I think her cry reflex is just very strong through random genetics. She's calm when she has her needs met. I think she gets too worked up to that point.

Once she starts feeding she's fine, in a long winded answer to your Q - but with the 3 months of colic, I would have missed a bottle = pain association being formed. She does eventually take enough (she is a chunky monkey), its just very unpleasant and without persistence that often feels like abuse, she would happily starve (as evidenced on days when I'm away)

OP posts:
MotherOfDragon20 · 10/04/2022 09:04

Oh god this brings back memories! My DD was the same every feed was about an hour of protests and screams, hated cuddles and just always wanted to be down looking about exploring (she crawled VERY early). She was treated for reflux but like you I was never convinced she actually had it and the treatment certainly made no difference. Does your DD take a dummy? If she doesn’t it’s probably too late but honestly a dummy saved my life, she still screamed but the dummy gave her so much Comfort. I’m happy to say she’s now an absolute delightful 17 month old who is meeting all developmental milestones and is the most cuddly affectionate little girl! So many times a day she will just run up to me, wrap her arms around my neck and give me the biggest slobbery kiss ever 😂

Original poster
Sillymummies123 · 10/04/2022 09:24

@MotherOfDragon20

Oh god this brings back memories! My DD was the same every feed was about an hour of protests and screams, hated cuddles and just always wanted to be down looking about exploring (she crawled VERY early). She was treated for reflux but like you I was never convinced she actually had it and the treatment certainly made no difference. Does your DD take a dummy? If she doesn’t it’s probably too late but honestly a dummy saved my life, she still screamed but the dummy gave her so much Comfort. I’m happy to say she’s now an absolute delightful 17 month old who is meeting all developmental milestones and is the most cuddly affectionate little girl! So many times a day she will just run up to me, wrap her arms around my neck and give me the biggest slobbery kiss ever 😂
You made me a cry with a little happiness. I'm laid up with covid whilst DH is caring for the kids (I am dealing with baby feeds because she literally wouldn't take it from him for days - we have tried). 7 months and 2.75 years at the same time feels so hard. Our toddler is lovely but feels exceptionally hard - easily worried etc. He doesn't do well with divided attention so I keep getting up to play but then have to retreat back to my darkened room.

Thanks for your reassurance. It helps

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread