Family Court - Court Order

[Amz1986]

Hi,
Can anyone provide some advice for me.
Does anyone know where I would stand being in contempt of not waiting for my ex partner to agree on who can privately assess our child?

My ex has it court ordered that I have to consult him/include him in choosing who undertakes an assessment on our child for additional needs.

I have provided a list of people to my ex that I have contacted about doing an assessment, if he doesn’t come back agreeing to someone in 7-10days I’m considering booking an appointment telling him who’s doing it, where and when etc but I would be in contempt of court if I done this. What is the judge likely to do/say if I don’t this?

Bit of background this is the 2nd time I’m having to find someone to do this assessment as the 1st person he agreed on (agreed roughly 8 weeks after I had given him the details of the drs) doing the assessment ex requested that solicitors wrote to the DR asking them to do the assessment. That DR came back and said they don’t take legal instructions so will no longer do the assessment so I’m now back to square one and having to provided another list of drs to my ex to consider as to who he will agree to doing an assessment. I don’t seem it in our child’s best interest to wait for another 7-8werks for him to agree to someone else when in that time our child could be being assessed and be able to access the help and support they so desperately need.

I feel he’s being obstructive to the assessment going ahead as we have a final hearing for a CAO and the judge will take any additional needs into consideration when making the CAO.

He has refused to pay towards the assessment saying he can’t afford to so I’m having to solely fund it which is fine as I want what’s best for our child.

When you sent him the list did you state a time frame? Like, can you let me know by April 20th so I can get this booked in as soon as possible? Anything like that?

Is it consult with or include him in decisions? Because that could be read differently

Personally I would have narrowed it down to three told him my preference and why asked for any objection/preference by x date then if he ignored it booked it because you have given him clear expectations and a time frame any questions about it you can say I believed he had no objections or preferences because he didn't reply by the date specified

@Theunamedcat nope my solicitor never said anything like that on the letter. Last time we was in this situation he said he hadn't received the letter after 2 weeks. We then sent it again and had to give him a week to respond but he took over a month to respond to it saying his solicitor was unwell so wasn't at work to respond.

@Theunamedcat wording says "jointly agree the identity of the assessor"

Whats the background to this?

Does the child's father agree or disagree with the need for the assessment? Why has the court been so specific about you both jointly agreeing on who the expert is?

If the court are overseeing this then delays from either solicitor are not necessarily the father's being obstructive. Its not his fault that the first doctor doesnt do work under legal instruction

Or are there bits missed out of what is happening?

Is this a family psychological assessment?

@bellac11

It's an assessment for adhd. My ex doesn't believe our child has an additional need m, says he has no concerns etc. Our GP and little ones school have concerns as they've referred to CAHMs but ex hadn't done parenting course we was told to complete so CAHMs closed the referral as 'inconsistent parenting' ex took me to court claiming I was emotionally and psychologically abusing our child by thinking they had an additional need and trying to have them assessed. When we was last in court I asked the judge if I could have a private assessment done the judge asked my ex if he would allow one to go ahead which he said he would to (I feel the judge would of ordered the assessment if my ex had said no I couldn't get a private assessment done) my ex said in court he was in agreement to a private assessment as long as he was consulted on the identity of the assessor so it was court ordered that "we jointly agree on the identity of the assessor"

@bellac11 the judge just said we needed to jointly agree on the identity of the assessor not that a letter from solicitors needed to be done asking the Dr to undertake the assessment so I should be able to give him the details he agrees to someone then I contact the dr and book the appointment telling him when and where the appointment is etc it was my ex that said a solicitors letter needed to happen

Well then you identify one who you want to do the assessment, the solicitors will need to agree a timescale in which father responds by and if he doesnt respond in those timescales you take it back to court again and ask the judge to dispense with father's agreement due to it being impossible to get father's agreement

Usually CAMHS dont make it a requirement for parents to do a parenting course in order for them to complete an ADHD assessment. Why arent they agreeing to do the assessment (albeit the timescales are quite long)

[quote Amz1986]@bellac11 the judge just said we needed to jointly agree on the identity of the assessor not that a letter from solicitors needed to be done asking the Dr to undertake the assessment so I should be able to give him the details he agrees to someone then I contact the dr and book the appointment telling him when and where the appointment is etc it was my ex that said a solicitors letter needed to happen[/quote]
If its being done as part of the proceedings and will affect the outcome of who has the CAO, its being instructed by the court.

Usually a letter of instruction has to come from one of the parties

What is your own solicitor advising you.

@bellac11 the assessment isn't part of the proceedings we are in court for a CAO (where child will live, contact etc) not a SPO (assessment)

Of you are unable to get the assessment done as your ex is being obstructive then I woukd ask the court to delay the CAO until the assessment is done.

@bellac11 my solicitor has said a letter to the DR wasn't needed but so things couldn't come back on my in court and my ex say he wasn't in agreement that's why we agreed to send a letter from the solicitors.

Yep but CAHMS don't want to get involved when one parent is trying to get their child help and the other isn't 😔 they see it as a conflict of interest

@LittleOwl153 I've asked my solicitor if we can do this and been told that as the assessment isn't part of the court proceedings it's unlikely the judge will adjourn the hearing because the assessment hasn't happened this is why I'm considering going against the order of waiting for him to agree to the identity (obviously giving him 7-10 days to agree on the identity first before going against it)

[quote Amz1986]@bellac11 the assessment isn't part of the proceedings we are in court for a CAO (where child will live, contact etc) not a SPO (assessment) [/quote]
You said that the judge would take into consideration any additional needs of the child when making the order. That suggests the judge considers it information pertinent to the making of the order.

You havent said whether CAMHS felt he met the criteria for assessing for ADHD or not, its not my experience that they wont assess for that int he midst of inconsistent parenting (if that is in fact occuring)

What they do sometimes say is that they wont provide interventions/therapy where there is uncertainty or instability in the child's living circumstances. But I have never known a child not have an ADHD assessment for the reasons you give.

@bellac11
The court judge/magistrate has to take into consideration

The Welfare Checklist
The overriding consideration of the court in child arrangement cases in family proceedings is the best interests of the child. That consideration is paramount.
To assist the court in deciding the best interest of the child, the court refers itself to the criteria in the Welfare Checklist, which are as follows:

The wishes and feelings of the child (considered in the light of his age and understanding)

Child’s physical, emotional and educational needs

The court is required to consider the child’s short term and long-term physical, emotional and educational needs. They will consider which parent is best placed to provide these to the child and this will usually be based on evidence that has been submitted to the court.
Physical needs tend to be straightforward whereas emotional needs may require more investigation. A child’s needs will change as they become older and therefore the court must be satisfied that the parents can manage these changes and provide stability for the child at the same time.

The likely effect on the Child of any change in his circumstances

Child’s age, sex, background and any characteristics, which the court considers relevant

The court must have regard to consider the child’s age, cultural and religious background and other characteristics, which are specific to the child and the wider family.

Any harm, which the Child has suffered or is at risk of suffering

The court will examine carefully the harm that the child has suffered and harm that the child is at risk of suffering in the future.
Harm is broadly defined and not limited to ill treatment of a physical kind but also emotional harm, all of which may cause the impairment of health, development and emotional well-being of a child.
The court will weigh up the potential risk to the child and issue an order that reflects the needs of the child. Any order made by the court may include protective measures, which are aimed at safeguarding the child.

The capability of each of his parents, and any other person in relation to whom the court considers the question to be relevant, is of meeting his needs
The court will want to ensure that both parents are putting the child first and are able to meet all the child’s needs.

The range of powers available to the court
The court will consider every option and can make a wide range of orders, even if they have not been applied for by the parties to ensure the best interest of the child.
As the judge has to take this list into consideration I believe my child's additional need will be taken into consideration.

CAHMs didn't say weather they felt our child met the criteria for assessing but the school asked a behavioural specialist to come in and do some work with our child and the behavioural specialist said our child meets the threshold for a diagnosis of ADHD but they're not qualified to diagnose so our child will need to be referred to CAHMs to get the diagnosis.

I work with the family courts! I use the welfare checklist in my work

However what you are saying is that the judge has expressed that the outcome of the assessment is not necessary for the court to decide about the CAO, is that right?
That is very unusual but if that is the case, what does the judge say about CAMHS refusing to assess? At the moment family courts are sick of CAMHS not completing work with young people that need it and are often asking for statements from them, has that happened?

@bellac11 my solicitor said they don't think having an assessment done will change the outcome of what is ordered. Our child was referred to CAHMs the day before the last hearing and our next hearing is the final hearing so until we get into our final hearing on when we submit our statements etc the judge won't know that CAHMs refused to assess but then again our local CAHMs has a waiting list of 14 months so when last in court I asked the judge if I could get a private assessment done so our child could get any help/support they needed sooner rather than later as I don't feel it's in our child's best interest to wait a year when I am willing to pay for it to be done privately. The judge agreed that it is in our child's best interest to be seen sooner rather than later but said that my ex needed to be involved in choosing who does the assessment (as ex agreed to a private assessment going ahead as long as he had involvement in choosing who undertakes it)

@bellac11 sorry I didn't understand your message properly and that's why I put the welfare checklist down.

As we haven't been back in court so the judge doesn't know little one been discharged as ex didn't complete parenting course like we was both told to for them to be seen/assessed no statement has been asked for

Well your solicitor needs to ask for a hearing to discuss that, although as you say the private assessment should be being sorted out. If your solicitor feels that the father is being obstructive then he will need to raise that. What does the Guardian think?

@bellac11 I've asked my solicitor to apply to court for a SIO to have the assessment ordered but don't feel that they will do that as they feel it won't make any different to what the judge orders and because my ex's solicitor told them that if they apply for a SIO without giving them a Pugh time to consider everyone I have submitted they will contact the legal aid department asking them to revoke my certificate and ask the Legal aid to request I pay all my costs back.

Child hasn't been given a guardian, They have a social worker and the social worker has said they can't get involved in anything to do with a private assessment as it's 2 parents in conflict

@bellac11 child in need plan to ensure child doesn't get affected by the court proceedings x

Is this in England. Normally the courts will order the LA to hold the case if there are parenting concerns. Otherwise it just sits with a Guardian.

A child in need plan is not put in place to ensure a child doesnt get affected by proceedings.

@bellac11 yes I'm in UK. Social worker done S37 and said for child to go on CIN plan to ensure they don't get affected because of proceedings etc because of animosity between me and my ex.

I think that you do not wish to piss the courts off at this point by disregarding their order!

So, I'd send another message, one at least by email ccing in yours and his solicitors, one by signed for/recorded delivery letter to his home address. Within this 2nd letter, I'd say that if you don't receive any response to the contrary within 7 days from receipt, that you'll take this as his agreement with your choice.

That covers you. Puts the onus on him.

@ChoiceMummy yeah I don't want to go against the court order to be honest but then I have started to wonder if I don't go against it could it put me at risk in court of neglecting my child's needs etc?