3.5 yr old routine I’m in a rut!

[HelenM77]

Hello I need some non judgemental advice/support. I have a 3.5yr old LB. He’s fully potty trained during the day but still wears a nappy at night time and still has milk before bed more for comfort than the need to have it. It keeps going round and round in my head but I just can’t see a way forward. He needs to stop having the milk to have any chance of beginning to be dry at night. He also is VERY attached to his dummy which I’m determined to get rid of but just don’t know when or how. I feel like a terrible mum who’s holding back her son. He’s a very happy cheeky little boy. Please help me I’ve got my self into a right state about it in my head. What have others done?

how about Reducing the amount of milk gradually over a couple of weeks. and bringing it forward on the evening a little bit too each day?

Does being dry at night matter?

It’s a hormone thing, it happens when they are ready.

Night dryness is hormonal and it takes up 6 years old to produce the correct hormones. Is the milk in a bottle? For either I would just go cold turkey, maybe the dummy fairy can bring a gift. I would get rid if dummy and bottle separately and make sure you put them all at the bottom of the wheely bin so you don’t get them out.

We switched the milk to water and he didn't want it anymore.

Night dryness isn't anything to worry about his though, it'll happen in time. I'd be more worried about the dummy affecting his teeth.

Oh god I've no intention of stopping the night bottle and my child is the same age! I take her for a wee at about 10pm before I go to bed, could that be an option?

I wouldn't worry too much about the milk and night dryness. It's completely hormonal so may not make any difference whatsoever. My son will be 4 in June and still has milk before bed (in a straw cup). He is potty trained in the day but wears a nappy at night, sometimes he's dry and sometimes he's not. I'm not going to worry about it for at least another couple of years. We've started cutting down the amount of milk he has though, it's just a comfort/routine thing for him while he's having his bedtime book but some days he says he doesn't want it.

@changenametimeagain

Oh god I've no intention of stopping the night bottle and my child is the same age! I take her for a wee at about 10pm before I go to bed, could that be an option?

This is generally not advised because it just encourages them to wee when they are not fully awake.

I'd go cold turkey on the dummy, it'll be hellish for a few days but then it'll be fine. Maybe a present for being such a big boy. Bribery works well on my just turned 4yo! If he's having his milk in a bottle I'd switch it for a cup at the same time.

Night dryness is caused by a hormone isn't it? We reduced milk a bit when we potty trained but DS was some how night dry very quickly and has only wet the bed twice - once when he was very ill and once when we brought his sibling home. He still has a good sized cup of milk every night so I don't know how much difference it makes.

Bribe with a present to get rid of the dummy.

Stop worrying about the night dryness. It will probably come in time by itself without you doing anything at all.

I wouldn't worry too much about night dryness at this age. DD is 3 and wears a pull-up overnight. Some nights it's totally dry and she will get up to pee, others she is out cold and pees in her nappy while asleep. I figure it'll work itself out at some point as she's totally trained during the day!

As everyone else has said, nighttime dryness is hormonal and many children are not dry at night until 5+.

If the milk is in a bottle get rid of the bottles and the dummies at the same time. Make sure you pre-warn him. Use the dummy fairy or tell him that they're going to babies who need them or any other nonsense you think he will buy into. It can be the dummy T-rex if that's what he'll go for.

Make sure you do a fair swap. He gives up the dummies and bottles but gets a big boy cup/water bottle and a present in return (for example).

Having milk before bed is absolutely fine. I would just try and move it earlier in the routine (an hour before bed) so he can go for a wee before he goes to bed. If it's loads of milk you could also slowly reduce the amount he has.