Hello Everyone,
So I guess I am posting here to spread awareness.
My husband and I have 2 little boys who are 7 and 5. We've been trying for our third and final baby for nearly 9 months when suddenly just after Christmas I discovered I was pregnant!
I was so happy, totally elated! I told so many friends and family, and eventually at 11 weeks I thought I was safe to tell my boys.
We did some genetic blood testing for the gender using Sneakpeek, and I discovered my third baby was finally the girl I had always hoped for! - My love for her just grew with each day.
We decided to call her Halle Mai, (Mai being a family name we loved that means a lot). At our 12 week scan she was kicking around, waving and even turned her back to us! Rude.
Everything looked good, I could see her little heartbeat thumping away, and then the sonographer when silent. She was focusing on Halles head, she took multiple measurements and suddenly she turned off the monitor, I didn't even get to hear her heart....
She looked at us and said "Im really sorry, but your baby has some problems with her head, it doesn't look like she's formed properly" Initially i said "Oh...." and nothing else, and then it hit me, and i broke into FLOODS of tears, I could not compose myself at all. They told us our little Halle has something called Anencephaly, and it was fatal. Her skull has not formed on the back of her head, exposing her little brain - there was no way she could survive.
I am now nearly 14 weeks, and going in to have a specialist ultrasound tomorrow in Cardiff which is a few hours from us here in wales. They told me to expect to make some difficult choices, but we know we only really have one choice, and that will be a very much unwanted termination of a child we had hoped and tried for....It does not feel fair.
They told me a factor Halle has this condition is not having enough folic acid, but I had taken it from day 1 of my pregnancy up until 12 weeks, Maybe its because I am a little chunkier now post covid that i didn't realise having a bmi of 30 meant I should have been on a higher dose, but I feel its my fault.
We are going to cremate Halle, and being a goldsmith gives me the advantage of making myself a ashes pendant for her, but it was never something I thought I would be making. We are also burying some of her ashes in the churchyard we got married in, I am going to miss this child more then I can say, my daughter - I wanted so much to have known her.
So this is a thread to urge you all to take your folic acid, and up your dose if your overweight - Please be aware of the risks of anencephaly, it cannot be treated and its any mothers worst nightmare. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone.
Thank you