Been married 8 years. Got a 6 year old and 3 year old girls. My husband and I both work from home, him 4 days a week and me - I have 1 full day a week and 3 x 5.5 hour days available for work as an illustrator. One day a week I have my youngest at home. Since the children were born I have done all of day care and all of the night feeds (I used to sleep in the spare room with the monitor so as not to disturb him), all of maternity leave care. I now do the school run 4 days a week (he does this on his one day a week that he is 'off'), all of washing, drying, cooking, and childcare from 3 pm 4 days of the week. He sees the 4 days of the week as my days (when he does little or no childcare/no schools runs or cooking, he often works late in his office too so the children only see him at bedtime), when I get the kids up, dressed and ready, do most of the tidying, get bedrooms sorted, uniforms sorted and ready, change the bedding, do all of the homeschooling during closures, do addition homeschooling for eldest who has sight problems so needs quite lot of additional support at home, all doctors, eye hospital and school appointments, do childcare and organise days out etc., during all of the school holidays, (when I cannot usually work because, at best and under pressure, he might only book a few days off, because he just doesn't see it as his duty) I research and book most holidays. You know, all of that other sh*t that we just DO, and have to think about and plan, like buying clothes, making sure coats are washed, practice for the spelling test is done, swimming and PE kits, after school clubs, constant worrying about it all. He thinks, because he goes to his desk and works intensely at his high pressured job for 4 days a week, takes the bins out and cooks/does childcare and school runs on his one day 'off' from work a week that we do the same amount of work. At weekends, he cooks, not because we have agreed this but becuase I just make sure I'm nowhere near the kitchen at meal times so he has to do it. We do lots of active stuff with the girls as a family at weekends, so I very little time off. We have this circular argument, every few years when my resentment reaches saturation point, whereby I lose my temper and we have a shouting match about how I think he's not helping enough with the children, he gets really angry, he strongly believes we do the same amount of work of equal value, he also thinks that I've got plenty of time to gets loads of paid work done, between getting back from the school run 4 days a week at 9.15am and when I have to leave at 2.45pm to go collect the children again, and implies that, because he can just switch off and go to his desk, and block all other things out, that I should too and that I've got a time management problem. I disagree, we never resolve it, sulking takes place usually for a number of days, when he acts wounded because I've dared to suggest he's not pulling his weight and I am tired, so tired of the treadmill of it all. I have tried to accept this is what it's like, that he will never budge from his position that he thinks he does enough and I don't accept that he does, and well, I cannot seem to keep my mouth shut lol and accept it. Gosh that was a rant. I love my kids, they are my life. Divorce not an option, I want stability for them. My friend says go away on my own for a week, so he gets a shock and sees what it's like and how much work's involved. I did that once for a few days and he didn't even open any of the curtains for the whole time I was away! An elderly neighbour knocked because she thought there'd been a bereavement! Any advice on how to resolve? Anyone else in a similar situation that they've managed to resolve successfully without violence or divorce lol?