Single parent going back to work struggle

[Emiliamumof3]

Hi, I'm a mum to 3 kiddos, age 10, 9 and 2. I'd like to ho back to work but dad is not willing to share half term. His explanation is that he always worked full time and hasn't got enough holiday days to cover half term and cant afford childcare. My argument would be that if I go back to work I'll be in the same position and expected to organise childcare and pay for it. I do have ambitions, I used to be an accountant and was doing ok. I'm not working atm until little one goes to school. I'm dreaming of owning a house but I get nowhere near making it a reality if I dont start working. I feel kids dad takes that chance from me which is so unfair. And for what? For this ridiculous old fashioned rule of women raising kids and men providing? But when I'm a single parent that makes me both doesent it? Another reason from him is that he doesent know any other blokes that take so much time off work to look after kids and if he has to use all his holiday allowance that will leave him with not time to have a break for himself. What about me? Am I the only mum with ambitions? Am I expecting to much? What's happening to the equality and being treated fair? I'm sorry if I sound like a selfish cow but seriously I feel like now all the responsibly of looking after kids falls on me and guys only want to fuck about with kids every two weeks, job done. Is anyone in a similar situation? HELP! Am I getting things totally wrong? I will appriciate all comments. Thank you

My exdh has our dc for half the holidays every year and so do I. Unfortunately annual leave allowance does not cover the 13 weeks school holidays plus all thee xtra for in service days and bloody elections. On these days I pay to put ten in clubs or swap with friends kids when I can. Absolutely no excuse for him not to do this. I have never had a holiday away from my dc and have only ever had two nights away since divorce as he does not have room for them to stay over.
Insist that he does his share and send him the schedule for the school holidays a year in advance.

I’m sharing the kids 50/50 with my ex. This means he covers half the holidays. However does mean get no child maintenance

My sister's EXDH is exactly the same. 'Luckily' she works in a school so can have the kids in the holidays but it makes it impossible for her to get a job elsewhere and she is on a low income.

Could you look for work in a school, a bursar role for instance - I saw one advertised last year that was term time only plus one week in August (and the school had childcare on site for that week as all the staff needed childcare). Once your youngest is 3 you get 30 hours paid which will really reduce the cost of childcare