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Original poster

Early potty training question

23 replies

prefernot · 20/11/2004 20:43

HI, I posted already about whether or not to train my dd who's just turned 2 (25 months). I'd expected to do it when she was 2.5 but she's been very keen to use a potty for a poo and has been asking me to change her nappy after EVERY wee!!

Today was the first 'real' day of leaving her mostly nappyless at home. She's quite happy to sit on the potty for short periods of time and poos there fine but is very against the idea of doing a wee there and was clearly 'holding it in this afternoon' until a little dribbled out on the floor and I suggested the potty but she got very upset and insisted I put her a nappy on so she could wee. I did do that and she did an enormous wee.

Does this mean I should abort current attempts as she's not 'ready' for it, or is this a typical beginning thing?

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Lonelymum · 20/11/2004 20:47

Wow! She can hold on to her wee while you put a nappy on? That is excellent control! I have never come across a child who wouldn't wee in the potty (quite common for children not to poo in it). She has such marvellous control, I think you should continue with the nappy off. Couldn't you bribe her with some chocolate buttons to get her to wee in the potty? You don't have to do it too often before it becomes second nature for them to use the potty and then they stop expecting the choccie. Well' it worked for mine!

pupuce · 20/11/2004 20:49

Persevere for a couple of days and see how she feels. 25 months old is not that young anyway.
She does have bladder control but her issue is being scared... presumably you have shown her how you do a wee ???

dinny · 20/11/2004 20:53

Prefernot, think I read somewhere to try putting an open nappy actually in the potty if your toddler only wants to wee/poo in a nappy. then when they are used to going, remove it. good luck.

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Hulababy · 20/11/2004 20:57

I too would persevere a bit longer. DD was PT'd at 24 months, just after her 2nd birthday. The first day was great, but the second day she did the same thing - holding on to wees for as long as possible until she had near accidents. Day 3 she "got" it again and didn't have an accident that day or since.

Original poster

prefernot · 20/11/2004 21:11

Thanks everyone.

Yes, she always comes with me to the toilet and watches very interestedly to see what I do.

I find it strange that she's happier to poo than wee in the potty too.

If it seems to be really upsetting her, should I persist?

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pupuce · 20/11/2004 21:13

I would say yes if it was my DD.... when ever I have found my DD distressed (OK it's not often) I would just hug, cuddle and re-assure her... not pressurise her.
I presume you are staying all positive and happy....

Hulababy · 20/11/2004 21:14

If it is really upsetting her then maybe you should leave it for a few days, and then try again.

dinny · 20/11/2004 21:14

has she seen any of her friends use potty? dd only really wanted to use it after seeing friends at nursery do it.

fruitful · 20/11/2004 21:47

I got a flat terry nappy and wrapped it around the top of the potty (so dd was sitting on it but not weeing on it). She was used to cloth on her bum while weeing so that seemed to help. Chocolate buttons helped too!

Original poster

prefernot · 20/11/2004 22:01

Yeah, I'm getting the message about chocolate buttons now!

Oh, yes, I'm staying very calm and positive. Part of the problem is that she thrives on praise, I mean I know all kids do, but she seems already to have a low threshold for 'failing' and gets very upset and frustrated when she can't do something 'right.' So even if I tell her it doesn't matter etc. she gets very disappointed with herself.

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dinny · 21/11/2004 11:54

at nursery they use stickers - I got loads in and dd LOVEs getting them. really helped, I think.

Original poster

prefernot · 21/11/2004 20:43

Today's been better. Dd did her first wee on the potty and ALL her poos. The first wee happened because I knew she must need one and so got her to sit on the potty and entertained her while she sat with various little games and stories until she suddenly said 'Doing wee wee mummy!' and she was thrilled. The poos are so much easier as she asks for the potty to do it in.

We went out this afternoon with dp though so I put her in a nappy and she did wee without mentioning it. I'm not sure when to make the move to no nappies for going out.

I have a quick question too about how you cope with going on long-ish bus / train journeys. I live in SE London and public transport is a painful must. What would you do ifyour child needed to wee while in the middle of a 1 hour bus journey?!

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dinny · 21/11/2004 20:49

Well done to your dd. Re journeys, their bladder control gets really good quickly. But I take a Tommy Tippee portable potty out still so I'd get off the bus pronto.

pupuce · 21/11/2004 21:05

Have faith, DD was 23 months old when I potty trained her - it was super easy, I knew she could hold herw ee so i use to say we are leaving in 10 mins, do you need to do a wee.... she said no, I told her 5 mins later, she said no and sometimes she might go with 1 min to spare.... At the beginning I had a potty in my bag (for less than a week I think) and if she said she needed a wee I would find a corner and get her to sit on it... NO PROBLEM.... if she is keen it is really easy. I'd keep her off the nappy all together.
I don't think she ahs had 5 accidents in her entire life and she decidd to eb dry at nights at the same time and for that too we have never had an accident. Your DD sounds very ready.

Original poster

prefernot · 22/11/2004 11:19

Yes, pupuce, I'm going to cut the daytime nappies tomorrow. I've been treating these first few days as a kind of 'run up' to the Real Thing. I'm in a weird kind of shock that it's happening though as I hadn't planned for it just yet!

She did so well this morning, just sat straight on the potty, did a wee, then wandered round a bit and went back, sat down and did a poo. I didn't even have to ask her!!

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pupuce · 22/11/2004 11:26

She sounds just like mine.... ENJOY..... she might be ready to do nights too !

Original poster

prefernot · 22/11/2004 12:44

I hope so, pupuce, yours sounds incredible. So far it's been so wonderfully smooth I can't quite believe it will just work. But I'm not counting my chickens just yet

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pupuce · 22/11/2004 16:32

That's just the thing though... have faith in her - she obviously understands it and any accident would be a real accident nothing malicious or lack of understanding... DS was just the same, both mine were super easy to potty train and they were both dry day and night simultaneously as well. She was 23 months old, he was 28 months old.
It is a big advantage to have such an easy time.... I feel embarrassed !!!!

Original poster

prefernot · 22/11/2004 21:00

How do you get them to realise not to wee / poo in pants when they've grasped not to wee / poo when naked from the waist down?

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pupuce · 23/11/2004 10:56

Ha... now that's a tad trickier from child to child.
DS was always doing on potty when naked (no pants) but it took 4 months (I stopped in between of course) for me to try again with clothes on... so at 23 months he was fine when naked (would hold easily and sit on potty without any prompt) but after 3 weeks he went into pull ups as I got tired of accidents in clothes (tried star charts and didn't work... he didn't care) but I tried again at 27/28 months and he was clean ASAP.
DD was never an issue - she immediately got it with pants on... I think the first 2 or 3 days she was potty trained and naked but then we quickly dressed her again and took her out.
I vividly remember taking her for a 1h30 car journey and kept asking her every 10 mins or so, do you need to wee? she kept saying no... and then she said yes, I stopped the car, took potty out and she weed! I was most impress with her. The next day she said she needed to wee and we weren't next to a toilet, I told her I was taking her to a toilet (which I was of course) but she'd have to hold on for a few minutes... she did, bless her !

Try her in pants.... see how she gets on. Don't go anywhere (for long) that day as to not add complexity to the issue.

Original poster

prefernot · 23/11/2004 13:49

I did, took her out this morning and 5 minutes out the door little voice says 'got wet trousers, mummy'. Fortunately I'd brought lots of changes with me (plus potty of course!) so it wasn't a big problem and she didn't need to go again until after we'd got home.

We have had a little trauma though which I've started as another thread ... wonder what you think?

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welshmum · 23/11/2004 13:54

Hello prefernot, long time no speak. Sounds like your dd is doing fantastically well on the potty training front, I'm very impressed. Are you still up for a meet sometime? I'll email you if so. take care xxxx

Original poster

prefernot · 23/11/2004 14:16

Hello welshmum! Yes, I'd love to meet. Well, potty training's going well and not so well. We'll see! What age did you do your dd?

I'd LOVE to meet as soon as I dare travel further afield than the corner shop!!

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