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AIBU for being mad at partner

2 replies

1stTimeBoyMumx · 17/03/2022 22:12

Back story - my other half has epilepsy his last seizure was 2 years ago but he does have 'mini seizures' every couple of months which make him go foggy and need to sleep for a few hours. It's brought on by lots of things but sleep and alcohol are big factors (alcohol as in being drunk drunk - he can have a couple of beers)

When our son was newborn and my partner went back to work he stayed in the spare room to get a good nights sleep. I was totally fine with it and it was my suggestion he would argue not too but I said I would rather him be able to go to work and bring money in and come home and be able to help than have a mini seizure or full seizure and be no use to anyone for a couple of days. I was exhausted but it's fine and we're through it. Fast forward to now and our son is a fantastic sleeper. After some sleep training he has slept 7-7 (ish it's abit earlier for waking at the minute) since he was 10 months (he's now 2.5). Apart from when he is poorly.., which he is now. On a week day I would rather my other half sleep and be ok for work as he works full time and I'm now part time but what bugs me is he will still sleep in the spare room on the weekend when my son is poorly to make sure he gets enough sleep (he's got a cough at the minute, it's disturbing him as well as us and it's worse at night, if it was sickness or something he wouldn't do this) but he will also have a beer or two!? Now I wouldn't dare have a beer because I know I'm definitely not getting a good nights sleep tonight but it feels like he has never had to sacrifice like I have, I love my sleep and if I don't get enough I suffer terribly with migraines but I plough on. Obviously I don't want him to have a seizure but I just think it's selfish to have a beer and then take himself off to the spare room for a good nights kip whilst I'm currently lying awake listening to my son cough waiting to go get him if he gets upset to have a cuddle and try and settle him back off. On. My. Own. I'm exhausted and it wouldn't bother me him sleeping in the spare room if he hadn't had a beer but I don't know if I'm just tired and being unreasonable! We are on night 3 of this and it seems to be every 3/4 weeks we get a cold and cough 😩

OP posts:
LoganberryJam · 17/03/2022 22:15

I agree with you OP. It's fair enough during the week (given his health condition) but at the weekend he should be sharing the burden with you. Have you told him how you feel?

1stTimeBoyMumx · 17/03/2022 22:20

@LoganberryJam

I agree with you OP. It's fair enough during the week (given his health condition) but at the weekend he should be sharing the burden with you. Have you told him how you feel?
I honestly wouldn't mind if didn't have a beer but he likes a beer on the weekend. I have to some extent he said he won't have a beer tomorrow because he could see where I was coming from I think! And if I have a bad night with the little one he will get up with him so I can stay in bed but to be honest I can't sleep in anymore I'm so used to waking up at 7 with our little boy and to get ready for work! I'll speak to him properly again about it I could feel myself blowing it out of proportion in my head so didn't want to get into it properly x
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