Help! How to stop bedtime cradling and bottle?

[StopStartAgain]

Advice please. My 20 month old still likes having a bottle of milk and being cradled before his bedtime and before his daytime nap. (At nap time I only give water but he still has a bottle).

I know this might seem strange that I've done this for so long. However he sleeps really well all through the night 12 hours so I'm afraid it's just been easier not to rock the boat and change anything for fear he will stop sleeping so well!

Now I'm ready to stop doing this I'm sure it will be good for him too. He's too heavy and my back isn't good. Plus he's not a baby anymore. But he does get great comfort from being cradled, bless him, and I know he won't like the adjustment so I'm really not sure exactly how to proceed on a practical level with this plan, whilst making sure he still feels loved and secure before bed.

I don't mind him having a cup of milk before bed as we always brush his teeth after anyway, so it's more about a) the switch from bottle to cup and b) not being cradled to sleep.

Has anyone managed this at such an old age?

Bumping

You just...stop. You'll probably have a rough few evenings while he adjusts but they do adjust, and quickly.

My daughter was a few months younger than your son when I stopped rocking her to sleep but I just started putting her in her cot and holding her hand through the bar and she'd eventually fall to sleep. A few weeks after that I started leaving the room for her to fall asleep alone. She didn't like it at first but I was consistent and reassured her from her doorway every few moments. It wasn't nice hearing her cry but by that age I could tell it was angry crying because I wasn't giving in rather than scared crying because she was on her own. She was still the same baby the next morning, no damage done! You just have to be firm and commit to the new routine so they don't become confused and unsure. It's tough but stick it out. I think it's actually harder for us than it is for them, even though they're the one screaming.

How about cuddling in bed with him instead? My daughter went into a low bed aged 18 months and we started nursing lying down. Still doing it aged 3 but plan to change to just cuddling in the bed.

Thanks. I don't think he's ready for a bed just yet. He's very lively and curious and I expect he's be out of the bed the whole time, or falling out otherwise!

Yes maybe I should just try all of it in one go. It's just a scary step when his sleep is so smooth at the moment. (We've had sleep regressions so I know what it's like and would kick myself if I started having to get out of bed numerous times a night again.)

I rocked my baby to sleep for months, the HV told me to stop and when I asked how she said just stop. I tried and he was hysterical and I just couldn't do it to him. He was around 5 months so a bit younger than yours. What I did do was while rocking started patting his bum. I them slowly stopped the rocking and did just the patting. From there I done quick cuddle then into cot with a bum pat and off he went to sleep. Now at nearly 9 months we have weaned the patting and he goes into his cot has a role around then off to sleep.