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Original poster

Trip without baby?

36 replies

A3344555 · 09/03/2022 23:48

Big birthday for DH this year, planning on potentially going away for 5 days the country is too hot so we wouldn’t want to take baby as they’d be 8 months when we’d go (be back for his actual birthday day) so very young

My mother who is an amazing grandma and always cares for baby whenever we need and I trust her with him so much, her and my father are the 2nd best carers for baby just after me and DH being number 1!

However, I feel such a pang of guilt. Is this too long to leave my baby? I know I’d miss them so much and I’d want to celebrate DH’s birthday but it is in the back of my mind how guilty I feel.

Has anyone been away from baby while they were under 1? I feel like a terrible mother just asking this

OP posts:

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woody87 · 10/03/2022 14:36

@A3344555

Thanks everyone. I don’t really want to go alone I feel like I should do something with DH for his birthday and Abu Dhabi has been on his wish list for ever. Bit of wife guilt I guess but then would’ve led onto mum guilt !

But following on from last comment has anyone ever taken their child under 1 to Abu Dhabi or Dubai around this area? Is it too hot for them I assumed it was as it’s somewhere that’s hot all year

I lived in Australia until my DC were 2 and 6 months old. They coped fine with the heat, 0.2 tog sleeping back with only a nappy on and fan/air con in the room massively helps obv, especially when temps are high 30s/40.

It's a very personal choice to leave your children at a very young age, personally I wouldn't do it, other people feel differently.

sandgrown · 10/03/2022 14:45

When my children were 8 months and almost 3 I went to America for two weeks. One child stayed with each set of grandparents. They had a great time and though the 8 month old preferred grandma when we got home she soon settled back with me. They are in their 40s now and we have always been very close. Even the older one has no memory of being left. Go and enjoy your trip .

Blossom64265 · 10/03/2022 14:54

Does your husband want to leave his baby? Mine was extremely unhappy the few times he had to travel when dd was young. He did whatever he could to avoid it. We even thought about tagging along with him, but she was such a difficult baby it would have made things really hard on me and her do he put up with the separation.

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LimeSegment · 10/03/2022 16:53

But following on from last comment has anyone ever taken their child under 1 to Abu Dhabi or Dubai around this area? Is it too hot for them I assumed it was as it’s somewhere that’s hot all year

Lots of babies live there.

SleepingStandingUp · 10/03/2022 16:58

You're going away for four months?? Yes, that's too long imo

Original poster

A3344555 · 10/03/2022 17:27

@SleepingStandingUp I never said 4 months?

OP posts:

SleepingStandingUp · 10/03/2022 18:12

You said he's 8 months and you're coming back in his birthday.

Original poster

A3344555 · 10/03/2022 18:37

@SleepingStandingUp please reread the post I said to would be for 5 days???? Never said that infe

OP posts:

sageandbasil · 10/03/2022 19:02

@Flittingaboutagain that article says from 10 months to 3 years... 3 years!

Go op! If you're worried about yourself book a shorter trip but otherwise go and do not feel guilty!

SleepingStandingUp · 10/03/2022 19:05

[quote A3344555]@SleepingStandingUp please reread the post I said to would be for 5 days???? Never said that infe[/quote]
as they’d be 8 months when we’d go (be back for his actual birthday day) so very young my mind got stuck on that bit and forgot the 5days. Sorry, I think you meant DHs birthday?

I do think 5 day is a lot for first time at that age. I'd save the trip for a few years and book something shorter for now, just my opinion

Timeturnerplease · 10/03/2022 19:47

I’m very chilled about trips to grandparents - we’ve had 2/3 night trips away from DD1 when she was 13 months, 2.5 and just turned 3, and DD2 at 5 months (that one was unavoidable though, a family matter). They’ve been fine each time, and DD1 has actively loved it as she’s got older, as has my mum who lives 200 miles away and enjoys the quality time.

I’d be a bit worried about being a flight away, especially with such instability in the world at the moment, but babies in a hot country is a sodding awful experience (unless you’re the kind of person who’s happy to stay in the cool all day, which I’m not).

I don’t know what I’d do in your shoes, but decide based on your family and your situation. Don’t worry about what you ‘should’ do. So long as your child is safe and cared for by someone who loves them, then long term damage is unlikely.

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