If you use wrap around care, are you happy with how much you see your children?

[GooseyGanderr]

Or would you much prefer to have more time with them before and after school?

@Franca123 when I was a sahp for a while when the kids were very young, I didn't spend much time at home at all. I made it clear that if I wasn't working in a job out of the home, my role would be looking after the children NOT being a house wife. So I spent most time at play groups, music groups, at the park, meeting up with other mums and kids and yes doing activities. It was great. I'd have been bored out my mind if I didn't plan and organise stuff to do regularly. As soon as the kids were in nursery/school I started working again.

I find "playing" so boring. I love doing other stuff with my kids. Reading, watching movies, walking, chatting, etc but I was always shit at imaginative play.

I like my job and while I love my children and have a good time with them, I don’t really want to do that for long stretches of time. So I work nearly FT with two short days a week when I do pickup.

In all honesty a lot of “mum guilt” seems to be quite performative

When you cut through it what do you actually want to do vs feel you have to justify to other people in your life (including your inner voice and random strangers)

I do 33 hours over 5 days so I do 2 drop offs, 3 pick ups and kids go to ASC 2 days.

I find it a good balance between being at work enough so I'm not constantly chasing my tail and also being at home enough so there are clean clothes and food in the fridge.

I don't think dc care either way but I think it makes life easier at home if one of us just has a few days where we are home before 6pm.

My kids are only young 3&5 so I personally wouldn’t want to work full time at the moment, I do 3 days, 2’of which I leave at 3 to get my son from school so can do 4/5 pick ups. Even if that’s pick up and him chilling watching tv at home whilst I do my own thing, he enjoys it more than after school club.

I'm ok with the 3 hours I see them, I just wish it was middle of the day as I despise the between after school club period and bedtime!

To be honest if people go to work wraparound is kinda part of it isn't it? I can't see why this is even an issue

I've always thought that time working or away from home at the gym or out with friends is good for a balanced family life. Obviously you aren't just abandoning dc but providing they are loved and looked after then no need to feel guilty that isn't always you doing the looking after.

Men have historically had 2 weeks off (or not even that) when baby is born, then typically been out of the house 7 til 7, 5 days a week. At the weekends has needed time to himself to read paper / play golf. He has seen more than enough of his dc and dc are happy / good relationship with dad etc. Women torture themselves about spending much more time with their dc (but less than the wholesome earth mother they think they should be). Why?!?

My DD LOVES after school club. She sulks when we arrive to pick her up. My husband finishes work at 4pm & used to go immediately get her but she kicked up such a fuss that now we do pick up at 5pm 😂 gives him an hour to prep tea or hoover etc! It’s very handy! We WFH so school is nearby!