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Original poster

How did you survive lack of sleep?

32 replies

Timeturnerplease · 22/02/2022 12:50

I need some practical tips on how to survive sleep deprivation - not necessarily tips on baby sleep, but what did you do/eat/drink to ensure you could function?

DD1 was a bad sleeper so I have experience in this area, but DD2 is outdoing her by a mile now. She’s almost 7mo, always been FF but is a milk refuser so has to take most of her calories overnight when she’s sleepy enough to accept the milk. Been weaned since 17 weeks so thankfully has gone from hourly wake ups to 4/5 x a night, which doesn’t sound bad but DD1 age 3 is now going through multiple nightmares a night. DH deals with these but we live in a tiny house so I hear her shouting even through white noise. DD2 self settles like a champ and is happy in her bedside crib, just wakes so much that between the two of them we’re knackered.

At the moment it’s ok because I go to bed early and DH gets up early with them, but when I go back to work in April I’ll need to be up until at least 10pm every night working (I’m a primary teacher), plus will have additional marking at weekends and housework (DH does cooking, packed lunches, food shopping, gardening etc so it’s cleaning and laundry for me).

DD1 started sleeping properly when she dropped her final nap at around 18mo, so I’m thinking we’ve got about a year left of this to survive - hopefully less if DD1 gets over the nightmares soon and we can just share DD2’s wakes.

I don’t drink tea or coffee but am surviving currently on Pepsi Max, which I know isn’t great, and craving sweet things like mad in the morning I guess for energy. I have insulin resistance so porridge is a no no for me - I eat a lot of cheese, nuts and cured meats in the day but it’s not cutting it.

Sorry for the long post but what did you do to survive? Caffeine and cake? Healthy eating and fresh air?

OP posts:
Original poster
Timeturnerplease · 22/02/2022 12:52

Sorry, forgot to add that DH survives by drinking the most amount of tea I’ve ever seen a human consume - that can’t be good for him!

OP posts:
OinkyO · 22/02/2022 12:52

Ah.. I was going to say coffee! And a walk everyday. A decent multivitamin might help

Poppy709 · 22/02/2022 14:20

Hi OP, huge sympathies my DS was also a terrible sleeper at this he, he did get lots better and was sleeping very well by 10/11 months. Fresh air was my saving grace, up and out every morning to liven myself up. Tempting to reach for sugar but try and stick to some healthy foods that will give you slow release energy.
Just to say, i am also a primary school teacher and definitely don’t work until ten at night, is this definitely necessary? I know some schools have very toxic cultures on workload. Will you be full or part time?

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Original poster
Timeturnerplease · 22/02/2022 19:33

Thanks guys. Looks like caffeine is the easy way but I should be trying to be a bit healthier…

@Poppy709 I’ll be full time as I was after DD1. We have family childcare so that helps a lot, but I have a lot of extra responsibilities at school that I can’t seem to drop - ESL, county moderator, DSL, ECT/SCITT/PGCE mentor. My school are lovely but it’s only a OFE and I’m the most experienced there. Have refused to apply for deputy twice over the last few years because I cannot possibly see how I’d fit anything else in!

7.30pm and DD2 has already had a false start to bedtime 😴

OP posts:
DisneyGirl2387 · 22/02/2022 20:17

@Timeturnerplease
No answers but wanted to express my solidarity! Teacher here too (part time only now) and my 15 month old is a bad sleeper. Last night I got 4 hours sleep 1 hour 10.30 until 11.30 and then 3 hrs 2am until 5am). I drove to school feeling drunk. I too, work late as by the time I'm home, DS is I'm bed it is around 8ish before I even start work! So, no advice but I feel your pain!

stuntbubbles · 22/02/2022 20:22

Very hot coffee. Very hot shower. Fresh air. Swearing a lot. Closing my eyes as often as possible even if not actually sleeping, eg having a wee? Close those eyes, girl. Stirring something in a saucepan? Stop looking at it, close those eyes. Give your eyeballs maximum shut time. Cosleeping. Haribo. Dairy Milk. Cosleeping some more. Having a very filthy house and never cleaning. Don’t wash things so often so less laundry. Sit down a lot. Oven food = less cooking time = more sitting down, eyes closed time.

Shehasadiamondinthesky · 22/02/2022 20:26

I'm sorry to tell you this but I was never sleep deprived with DS he had to be woken for feeds as a newborn and always loved his bed. He only ever cried in the night if he was ill.
He was such a relaxed baby. He's a pretty laid back adult too. He's a professional artist.

stuntbubbles · 22/02/2022 20:28

@Shehasadiamondinthesky

I'm sorry to tell you this but I was never sleep deprived with DS he had to be woken for feeds as a newborn and always loved his bed. He only ever cried in the night if he was ill. He was such a relaxed baby. He's a pretty laid back adult too. He's a professional artist.
How is that helpful in any way whatsoever are you high!!
Fispi · 22/02/2022 20:36

Cut as many corners as you can. Lower standards for house dramatically. Take turns with DH to get day naps/early nights where you can on weekends. Hot shower soon as you can on getting up. Lots of water. Oven cook books by Rukmini Iyer and meal plan the week. Online shopping. Neglect the garden. Accept ALL help offered. Ask for help. Have a good cry in the shower or on the commute. Not a teacher - midwife and 14 hour days including a commute with a 2 hrly screaming wake up from DC1 till nearly 2 left me an anxious mess. You will survive and it will get better.

Lasagnaface · 22/02/2022 20:46

@stuntbubbles

Very hot coffee. Very hot shower. Fresh air. Swearing a lot. Closing my eyes as often as possible even if not actually sleeping, eg having a wee? Close those eyes, girl. Stirring something in a saucepan? Stop looking at it, close those eyes. Give your eyeballs maximum shut time. Cosleeping. Haribo. Dairy Milk. Cosleeping some more. Having a very filthy house and never cleaning. Don’t wash things so often so less laundry. Sit down a lot. Oven food = less cooking time = more sitting down, eyes closed time.
This is brilliant!
EezyOozy · 22/02/2022 20:48

Unfortunately- caffeine and sugar. Also fresh air and being around other people.

Avarua · 22/02/2022 20:48

Coffee.

Cant believe the poster above skiting about the sleepy baby!! Wtf!?

EezyOozy · 22/02/2022 20:51

Oh yes, brief lies down in a dark room if you can, even if not actually sleeping.

Mine are both preschooler age now so when I've had a very bad night with one or both of them I let them watch cartoons and lie on the sofa.

EezyOozy · 22/02/2022 20:52

@Shehasadiamondinthesky is a troll, ignore.

Haggisfish3 · 22/02/2022 20:52

What I should have done-taken a decent amount of time off sick. What I a CT ally did was middle through but nearly lost my job as a result. I slept whenever i could and would ask anyone and anyone to look after dc for an hour to allow me to get some sleep.

Oatsamazing · 22/02/2022 20:54

If there's a chance you have slightly low iron levels Spatone sachets are great. My midwife said I had borderline low iron when I was pregnant and wasn't going to prescribe me iron tablets but I asked for them and they made me feel so much better. Now I take spatone on and off, always makes me feel more energetic when I'm feeling knackered but can take about a week to make a difference.

Reluctantadult · 22/02/2022 20:54

Sweets. Particularly jelly beans. And maoam pinballs. With black coffee.

Reluctantadult · 22/02/2022 20:54

And yes to iron tablets.

MartinMartinMarti · 22/02/2022 20:55

@Shehasadiamondinthesky

I'm sorry to tell you this but I was never sleep deprived with DS he had to be woken for feeds as a newborn and always loved his bed. He only ever cried in the night if he was ill. He was such a relaxed baby. He's a pretty laid back adult too. He's a professional artist.
His mother, on the other hand, is smug and tactless.

OP - caffeine, sugar and fresh air. Do you have family who could take them both for an afternoon occasionally so you can top up on sleep?

Rewritethestars1 · 22/02/2022 20:59

@stuntbubbles has it. She knows.

Also put down your phone. Even in the few minutes you have spare to have a scroll don't. Otherwise you end up down a rabbit hole and waste precious sleeping or eye shutting time looking at mn and rubbish tiktoks. Also it strains your eyes and makes you more tired imo. Says she who is scrolling mn right now in the little time mine are asleep.

It will be the hardest thing ever but also try get some exercise. Just a walk will do for now. It does help even if it feels counter intuitive.

sjxoxo · 22/02/2022 21:10

I’ve not experienced your situation but yet sounds insane- please don’t work until 10pm every night! If you were my kids teacher I’d feel terrible you working until 10pm!

Can you address the lack of sleep rather than try and cope with it.. I’ll be honest the lifestyle you describe doesn’t sound survivable to me!! Why is your DD2 waking 4/5 times a night - I’d put all my focus into reducing that. From what I understand from your original post is she’s weaned? Can you up the calories in the day/evening so less waking, assuming she’s waking from hunger? Or is it for comfort? I would really do whatever had to be done to solve the problem of the too much waking up rather than try and cope. I’d be surprised if living like that doesn’t make you ill! Xx

mishmased · 22/02/2022 21:12

@stuntbubbles where were you when I had my first 9 years ago 😭😭😭 I could have done with this advice 😂😂 he woke up every 2 hrs until 21 months!

@Timeturnerplease I lowered my standards (eventually) after nearly having a mental breakdown. Mine had allergies so took a while to get better. I've got a 9 month old baby so have an idea of the tiredness. Sending solidarity your way ✊

sjxoxo · 22/02/2022 21:15

I give my baby boy a different milk before bed; it’s higher calorie - I’ve found he sleeps longer having had it. Could you try something like that to try and stretch out the night wakings. Then the nightmares- could you co sleep? My nephew has terrible nightmares and each evening they spray his room for ‘vampires’ with a water spray bottle!! Do whatever gets you through the night with least waking! Xo

Ghostofchristmaspasty · 22/02/2022 21:46

some great advice on here!

I had 2 awful sleepers.

Early nights as often as possible
You and DP each get a lie in at the weekend
Take any help offered
Lower your standards- No, even lower than that!
Sugar, caffeine, keep moving and fresh air after a bad night
Get a cleaner/ Gardener if you can afford it
Batch cook to make weekdays easier

The hard truth - Working FT with 2 young kids and then until 10pm is the fast track to burn out. I would consider my options PT, new job etc. I say that working a lot of overtime in the NHS and often finishing late. I couldn't work FT and then carry on until 10pm

TheSpottedZebra · 22/02/2022 22:58

Really specific but when I'm really sleep-deprived, my eyes get horribly dry and scratchy, so I use fake tears/viscotears. A sort ofbgelmthatnyou squeeze in to moisturise your eyes a bit.