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Parenting

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Original poster

When did your baby get a ‘bedtime’?

27 replies

NewMumma21xx · 19/02/2022 23:08

Mummy to my 8 week old DS! Loving every minute, we’re still led by him and no routine yet. HV and midwife both said around 12 weeks/3 months to try implement one or he’ll naturally fall into one

One think I wondered is when did your baby start going down for the night?

Currently DS will sleep in my arms in the day, after a bottle between 10pm and 11.30pm he’ll go down in his bedside cot, wake for a feed once in the night then wake about 7-8 for the day

I see so many people saying their baby goes to bed between 7 and 8pm , just wondered is it normal my DS doesn’t ‘go to bed’ yet at this time?

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Flittingaboutagain · 19/02/2022 23:12

I have only recently started putting my 7 month old "down to bed" because I followed the Lullaby Trust guidance and kept her with us for all naps and sleeps until 6 months. She slept in her Moses basket downstairs or in my arms on the sofa until we went to bed about 11 until about two weeks ago.

Mummy1608 · 19/02/2022 23:13

Our dd went to bed at the same time as us at around 10pm from 4 months until she dropped to one/two naps after 12 months. Before 4 months it was just a blur of screaming and napping until about 2am!

Everyone is different, no point trying to find out what's "normal", it'll just stress you out

Hasselhoffsheadband · 19/02/2022 23:21

No, my kids didn't start having a 'bedtime' until they were having enough food in the daytime that they could drop their 11pm bottle. Before this they stayed up with us, had a bottle at about 7/8pm, then slept in their bouncer thing/with us while we watched telly and then had a bottle at 11pm and then slept through until the morning (from fairly early on, we were very lucky!)

I was the only person I knew who did this- everyone else put their kids 'to bed' at 7pm and then got them up again for their 11ish feed. 8 just couldn't be arsed with the whole thing of putting them to bed when I knew we would be up again to feed. I do remember thinking I was doing wrong with DD as everyone else was doing it differently but it worked for us, and by the time DS came along we just did it all again!

Once they dropped the 11pm bottle (at about 9 months I think) then we started doing a proper bed time, which they both fell into fine.

So most people do seem to do a 7pm bedtime from quite early, but don't worry if you don't do that yet basically!

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Quornflakegirl · 19/02/2022 23:21

I think I missed this memo of them staying downstairs with you until a certain age. I did a bedtime from day one. My dtwins were born 6 weeks early and came home at 2 weeks old. I did bath, milk and put them to sleep in their cots from 14 days old. Bath (or wash at 5:30), milk at 6 and bedtime at 6:30. They work for feeds (or I woke them) every 3 hours until they slept through from 11 weeks and 14 weeks.

Partyatnumber10 · 19/02/2022 23:28

About 4 months I started trying to get a bedtime routine going and by 5 months we'd cracked it. 7pm- 7am with one night feed. It took a fair bit of perseverance to get there though.

Namechangegardens · 20/02/2022 06:40

Had a bedtime routine from early on, time varied wildly until basically 4 months on the dot where it quickly and naturally became 7pm

Feather12 · 20/02/2022 06:45

My first stayed up with us because I liked to lie in the next day. The second one was not quite so amenable and started her day at 8 every day. I don’t really see the point in insisting on early nights/early mornings until they start school really.

PurBal · 20/02/2022 06:49

Everyone is different, no point trying to find out what's "normal", it'll just stress you out

DS naturally found bedtime somewhere between 630 and 8pm really early on until about 2am. So we ran with that and formalised bedtime at 7 from around 10 weeks.

PurBal · 20/02/2022 06:52

I got told off I was at a wedding “poor soul, he must be exhausted, it’s well past his bedtime!” I was surprised, because no my 4 week didn’t have a bedtime and it was 9pm. I was rescued thankfully.

Svara · 20/02/2022 06:53

At about three. Before that he went at the same time as me and napped in the day or later slept longer while I got myself up and ready.

Twizbe · 20/02/2022 07:12

My two both had terrible witching hours. From about 2 weeks old to 3/4 months they both cried non stop from 7-9pm. It meant evenings were spent together in front of the TV with them clamped to my boob.

Once that stage was passed they'd go for a bath at 6:30 and bed at 7 after their bedtime feed.

We didn't follow the advice for them to always sleep with us. As newborns they mostly napped on us, in the pram or on the playmat. As they got older we worked on a pattern of morning nap in the pram and afternoon nap in their cot in their room.

When they got a bedtime we'd put them to bed in their own room and cot and move them in with us when we came to bed and they had their 10pm feed. My youngest dropped that feed at almost 5 months so we didn't move her after that.

MsSquiz · 20/02/2022 07:12

My dd kind of settled into a routine herself around 6-8 weeks.
We'd do bath, milk and then she'd go down in her bassinet downstairs with us.
I'd go to bed around 10ish and DH would stay downstairs with her until she woke for her feed around midnight.
He'd then feed and change her and bring her up to sleep in the next2me
Then she'd wake during the night for her next feed and go back down until 6/7am."

Thatsplentyjack · 20/02/2022 07:15

I've not ide with my first 2, it's too long ago now but my third sort of put herself into a bedtime routine and went to bed around 7 every night for a good few months. She's a year old now though and had decoded 8/9 is better for her and 6.30 is time to get up. Better than the 5am waking we had for a long time though.

Caspianberg · 20/02/2022 07:20

About 10-11months. Before that we just went to bed together

Sausagesausagesausage · 20/02/2022 07:23

About 4 months for DC1 and 7mo for DC2. DC2 is the significantly better sleeper despite not having any semblance of bath-feed-bed routine till 6mo.

Ragwort · 20/02/2022 07:27

Not popular on Mumsnet but we followed the GF routine and DS had a 'bedtime' of 7pm .... from the day we came home from hospital.

I assume we were incredibly lucky as he was a really good sleeper and I never had a disturbed night apart from one very quick night feed. I don't know if it was the routine or just luck ... I never had another child.

JaninaDuszejko · 20/02/2022 07:45

Each child is different. DD2 was the easiest baby ever who appeared to have read all the baby books before she was born. She was an incredibly efficient feeder, would then poo and burp immediately after a feed then I could put her down awake and she would quickly fall asleep by herself. Repeat as required. Not surprisingly it was very easy to put her to bed early in the evening like all the books tell you to. On the other hand DD1 and DS would cluster feed in the evening until my boobs looked sad and deflated. They went to bed much later but would sleep longer in the morning. They are all different people and they all get there in the end. Parenting babies is much easier if you ignore the baby books and listen to what your baby needs. With DD1 I was very hung up on trying to have a routine and spacing out feeds etc etc. With DD2 and DS they were offered the boob as soon as they squeaked and it made for a much easier parenting experience. Small babies are tiring enough without trying to mould them into a routine they aren't ready for. Accept you are going to be tired and remember in the grand scheme of things the small baby stage is really quite short (although I'm sure the last 8 weeks probably feels like 8 years).

JaninaDuszejko · 20/02/2022 07:53

Oh, and if anyone asks how he's sleeping answer 'like a baby'. Usually makes people laugh and they don't ask any more questions.

ShadowPuppets · 20/02/2022 07:57

DD went up to bed with us (about 11) until about 3 months, although she’d usually drop off in our arms in the living room around 8 and we’d head to bed when she woke for a feed.

After the 3 month mark we started putting her down in our room (small flat, doors open and monitor on) creeping backwards from 11. So by about 4 months she was going down in our room from 10, by about 5 months it was 9ish, by the time she went into her own room at 6 months it was 8. Since about 9 months she’s been going down at 7.30 and she’s 18 months now.

ShineTogether · 20/02/2022 08:06

Did a bedtime routine from about 1 or 2 weeks old. A friend suggested it and it worked for us. Before that we were feeling a bit lost in the evening, like we were missing something

Imsittinginthekitchensink · 20/02/2022 08:22

DD had horrendous colic when tiny, but once that went, about 6/7 weeks ish, I did a bedtime routine. I am very aware this was helped almost entirely by the fact she was a great sleeper, which was pure luck. So bath, feed, asleep in cot in own room about 7pm.

PolkaSpace · 20/02/2022 08:24

We followed the natural routine that LO fell into. Purely through it being less stressful for me as I was struggling in lockdown with PND.

PolkaSpace · 20/02/2022 08:24

She now naturally falls asleep between 7 and 8 each night

Abridget7 · 20/02/2022 08:51

Perfectly fine what you're doing now if it works for you. Both of mine had a vague routine by 6-8 weeks which we fell in to naturally starting with bath, dimmed lights in room afterwards, Sleeping bag on etc. Just little cues to help them understand now night

Ilikeanimalsmorethanpeople · 20/02/2022 21:17

my LG is 5 1/2 months now and bedtime is whenever her evening bottle is due! I feed every 4 hours so today it was due at 8:30 so she had a bath at 8 and then fell asleep so she's in her cot next to me with white noise on..but yeah basically she goes to bed whenever her night bottle is due! obviously sometimes it all falls to shit but we try!

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