Experiences of only children please

[Boiledeggsforlunch]

So for a variety of reasons that I won’t go into here, it’s looking like dd will be an only child.
I know there are positives and negatives for all scenarios but I wanted to hear experiences of only children so that I could try and give my Dd what she needs.

So only children:
If you had a wonderful childhood and good relationship with your parents was there anything they did specifically to support you as an only?

And inversely, if you were an only child who hated it was there anything your parents did that exacerbated your hatred of my it?

I’m one of four so have no idea what the experience of an only is like and want to support my Dd best I can. Thank you x

I was an only child and hated it. My parents did not get on and argued all the time and i was often left for hours while they yelled at each other.
I think if you make life fun for her she will be fine, there are lots of advantages to being an only child they can have all your attention and there will be financial advantages. You can make sure she has plenty of other children to play with. Just make sure she is not a spoiled brat.

Being an only child is brilliant. My parents had loads of time for me but I was not materially spoilt due to them being broke most of the time. Spoilt only child is a tedious myth, have met loads of non-onlies that are plenty spoilt!

However I definitely had opportunities that I wouldn't have had if there had been other children - both in terms of their time and spending.

Both my parents came from big families and weren't especially thrilled about their siblings as adults. And watching DH with his, especially in times of crisis such as when a parent is critically ill, I have felt that although I have to bear the burden alone, not having to mind the feelings of my siblings at the same time was a great relief.

It's not better or worse, just different OK it is better

I loved being an only child. I'm really close with my parents, I have loads of cousins that I'm close to so didn't miss out on the company of other kids.
My parents could do amazing stuff with me as they had the time and money to do so that if they had more would've been impossible.

My dd is an only child too. She's a lovely, bright and confident child. I wouldn't have it any other way. I too can spend time on doing things with her, although as a single parent it is sometimes a bit harder.

Very happy only here! Was also very happy to have an only myself, but unexpectedly pregnant with another.

They had time for me, we did things together or one on one time and learnt the value of things so , as above, I'd like to think I'm not 'spoilt rotten' and can't share etc.

Generally happy as an only child. I excelled at school because I had my parents full attention and support as they thought I was the best at everything so it was a self fulfilling prophecy. Very precocious early on then died a death at University when I realised I wasn't the best and my parents weren't around to prop me up.

I used to be terribly shy and longed to share with a sibling. Friends were the best I could do but my mum didn't like me having friends around so I still have some social anxiety.. I struggle with conflict as I never had a sibling to work that through.

They always put me first and I got the best of everything which sounds amazing but became a little overbearing at times. I felt too much the centre of their lives and happiness and still do at nearly 50.

As they grow older I realise it's just me who will be there for them at the end and I'm currently living thousands of miles away from them and they don't get any younger. That worries me.

Only child and hated it, still do.

Everyone assumes you are spoilt and makes jokes about it- even now I am an adult I get jokes about when people hear i have no siblings.

I was bored a lot as a child, no close cousins nearby which I think would make a difference.

I also feel a lot of pressure now as an adult that I will have to look after both my parents as they age- they both have health problems and are single so all responsibility will fall to me. It's awkward at Christmas, people think I'm evil if I don't plan every year around both of them. I moved away from where I grew up and everyone always asks about my mother and how will she cope.

@SmorgasBorb it is only me there at the end of my parents' life. But both DH and I have had our DFs die and honestly, it was better for me.

No arguing with siblings about who was doing what, no sneering about who got told what first, who was closest or who knew him best, just me, my mum and dad being us. And OMG the drama about FIL's funeral - who did a reading, who knew what music he liked, what a load of crap.

Yes it was exhausting emotionally just doing it on my own, and my mum has been v seriously ill and that has had a lot of impact being one person, but she's my mum and we do things our way together.