Help, I'm losing my mind. 3month old and 4yo

[Bananapancakes6]

I have a 3month old baby and a 4yo. Up until now my default way of getting baby to sleep is to put him in his bouncer, tuck him in, give dummy and comforter and rock until he falls asleep. It used to work fine, pop him in a corner and get on with jobs / play with 4yo.

Since about 2 weeks ago, it no longer works. He wakes at every little noise and 4yo is not great at being nice and quiet. He also wakes if I stop rocking him so I am spending my whole time sat in front of him desperately hoping he sleeps. Baby is barely napping, he hates the car and will scream and cry, the only other way he naps is if we go for a walk, but 4yo will not walk miles and it is a slog to get him out the house every day.

I need to find a way to get baby to nap in the house with 4yo, barky dog and open plan downstairs (so no where quiet to put him!) I have tried white noise and it does help but he still wakes often. I am getting to the end of my tether with the whole situation and I worry PND is creeping in. I am verrry close to just setting up his room for naps, even though I know its against guidance.

Please help!

Just put him upstairs for naps, honestly.

At the back door in the pram with white noise?
I always put white noise in if the baby is napping in the pram (we have a large hall so he goes in there). White nose is necessary with 3 kids

I used to put DS upstairs. Had a monitor and even a sensor under his mattress (only because it came with the monitor). I honestly would try upstairs OP.

Can you have a cot upstairs and camera and white noise?
That’s what we do, always down for naps in his own cot with a bit of white noise and we check on him all the time on camera.
I also have a 4 mo and a 3 year old so I complete get you.

In a carrier?

Are you sure it’s the noise? The noise has always been there
Suspect it might be dreaded sleep regression too?

Echo other recommendations of putting baby upstairs safer for naps with camera etc. or in pram in a cooler safe downstairs area you can check frequently

A sling/carrier or upstairs

Thanks for the suggestions! I have tried a carrier and he will sometimes sleep in there but usually only outside / on walks, he gets very hot if were inside (he runs hot) and gets annoyed quickly.

@DebbieHarrysCheekbones I'm not 100% sure. I think the problem is he sleeps so lightly. He has cmpa and silent reflux so is on allergy milk (that doesn't fill him up much) and omeprazole (tummy ache) so it's a bit of a minefield.

Buggy board for the 4 year old?

Put baby upstairs to nap. I had to do this with my youngest from 6 weeks old. He couldn't nap downstairs with his 2YO brother stomping about.

I put DS2 in his cot bed in our bedroom, in darkness with white noise on. I used a video monitor. I then went into DS1 room to set out some toys and play with him.

I'd definitely be putting him in cot upstairs for naps with monitor. 4yr old can watch TV or ipad while you are doing it.

Agree with others, definitely cot upstairs. I had a similar issue with my 18 month old and newborn. Newborn wasn’t able to nap, I was getting irrationally annoyed at the toddler for making normal amounts of noise, it wasn’t good for anyone. I know it’s not recommended but weighing it all up I decided to put the baby upstairs to nap with a video monitor, grobag and no loose covers and it worked better for all of us.

Another one for cot upstairs too. I had a little breathing monitor and video monitor too. It just wasn't realistic to have my second napping downstairs with an older child around. Had the room blacked out, with white noise and it worked a treat.

Oh I had this for the first 4 months. I ended up getting a double buggy and then walking. To be honest I didn’t mine, md dnd my 3 year old would get out and about and the paper would sleep

Thanks everyone. Going to give upstairs naps a go. We have a video monitor ready to go. Really hoping he can get some decent naps in.

In a bedroom upstairs away from the noise

Deffo upstairs. I got my little one into a swaddle & upstairs nap from 6 weeks. They also had their first stretch of night sleep upstairs from 6 weeks as well.. getting your evenings back is a godsend! We had a monitor & kept a close eye

I’d try upstairs.

If that’s no good and you have a secure back garden you could try putting baby in pram just outside the back door (obviously dressed appropriately for the temperature!).

I used to do this with DD and I think the various noises and things to see outside helped distract DD from her default of fighting sleep.

another thing that worked for us was bringing the buggy inside and rocking DC in the kitchen with the extractor fan on and music as well...! i could usually leave them after about 5 mins and then could go and spend time with sibling

What kind of baby carrier do you have? A light one like an ergobaby aura wrap, combined with just a vest, might help to keep him cool. In theory it should also help with his reflux. I have a very refluxy baby and he sleeps a long time in his wrap (as long as I’m walking, which is a bit of a pain but fine as I can time it so that he’s in there when I’m doing things).