Extra day at preschool or day at home with me?

[Preschool21321]

Not sure if this is the right place to put this

DS2 currently goes to preschool Tues/Thurs/Fri. He has Monday at home with me and Wednesday with my mum. My mum also helps me with DS1 school drop off/pick up as I'm a single parent so it is easier for her not to also have to do the preschool run.
I work Tuesday-Friday so thought him having the Monday with me would be nice for him.

Problem is he is due to start school in September and as a 30th August birthday he will be probably the youngest in this class. Alongside this he is very quiet and struggles socially. His older brother is the complete opposite and so DS2 he relied on him a lot when they are with other children etc. He now seems to be gaining more confidence at preschool, they have been amazing with him and have really helped him build up those social skills.

Question is, do I put him into preschool for the Monday too, after half term, to help him build that stamina for school and so he can keep working on his social skills or keep him at home with me for that day? I suppose I feel guilty that I could be spending the day with him, silly I know.

DS1 increased from 3 days to 4 in the run up to starting school but he also had an extra year at home due to being a September baby

What would you do? Thanks!

I would send him an extra day.

Extra day.

Why not half a day on a Monday so you get a bit of time to yourself but he also gets to spend some time with you too?

I would keep him at home.

Is there any way you could swap your mum's day to Monday and send him in on Wednesday?

I doubt there would be a massive stamina improvement if he does 2 days - 1 day off - 2 days - 2 days off. He already knows how to do 2 days in a row, I'd personally keep him at home with you. Unless you give 4 days in a row a try, which will be much more similar to what he'll experience at school.

I sent my August born 4 days by the summer term.

If you're worried about stamina for school i'd put him in for the morning and pick him straight up and take him out for the afternoon.

Mine are 10 and 8 now and I still miss the pre-school years when they were both my little mate on my day off. Don't deny yourself that precious time.

I'd keep him at home, it's a cliche but it goes so quickly. My youngest is 10 now and I wish I'd appreciated it more when they were little.

I'd keep him at home. These years are so short. It's precious time with them. It won't build his stamina it'll just make him tired a year before it's necessary for him to.

No, they only need to do 4 days if you need them to. Enjoy the solo time with him.

As the mum of a now 19yr old DS who is born 30th of August - keep him home and delay his going to school until he's 5. It makes a massive difference and DS even said to me last year he wishes i had held him back. He believes he would have done better in his A levels as he'd have been more mature and had an extra year for learning.

I would spend the day with him. You won’t get the chance to do that during term time once he’s at school. One day extra at nursery will make no difference to his progress, but you’ll both enjoy an extra day at home, I’m sure!

I'd keep him at home.

An extra day at preschool won't do him any harm, but he doesn't need to go.

The reception year of school covers getting used to school, socialising etc.

This current thinking that children need to be constantly in training for their next life step incase they're 'not ready' is madness. We'll have newborn babies doing 25 hours a week at pre-pre-pre school soon because, god forbid, they start nursery at a year old and 'aren't ready'!

I'd keep him at home.

Keep him at home if you are able to. Once he's at school you'll never have this opportunity again.

His stamina will increase naturally as he gets older, whether you send him to preschool for longer or not.

Thanks for the input everyone

I love having him as my little buddy on that day. My heart says keep him home but my head was saying it might help him to do an extra day. Not as a way of training him for anything but just that he has finally started playing with other children therr and that it might be nice for him to do more of that

Also thanks for the advice on deferring him but I won't be going down that road. He's going to the school I teach at and I'm happy that he will be OK there

You can send him to reception in 2023 instead if you think he'll struggle socially if he starts in
his usual cohort.

Oh, also, you can choose to send him fewer days if you start him at four. You can basically send him as much or as often as you like and build it up gradually from September, aiming to hit full time before Year 1.

I've just started thinking exactly the same thing! DS has just turned four. He would benefit from another day's preschool before he starts reception - three to five seems a big leap - but also I know these months will pass by so fast and it will be September before we know it.

In the end I don't think I'll regret him having the extra days with me and with family. He'll never be this small agin...