Finding time to express

[Carbis]

My 15 week old is breastfed but I need to try to get him to take a bottle as I have a wedding coming up that he can’t come to.

I’m struggling to find the time to express, I feel like I’m missing a trick. He pretty much only naps in the sling so I can’t do it then. I tried pumping after he goes to bed but I’ve never managed much from expressing and the end of the day when he’s just had a feed doesn’t generate much at all.

Formula is an issue because he may have CMPA - I’m a few weeks into eliminating dairy which seems to be helping a lot. So it would have to be prescription formula which I understand a lot of babies aren’t very keen on.

I’m feeling a bit defeated today and like I need to say I can’t go to the wedding.

I'd set a time to do it regularly as your body should get used to the extra demand and feed from one side whilst you pump from the other. If you do it earlier in the day you may be more successful

Do you have a haakaa? Use it on the inheritance side every time you feed and you should build up a little stash without any extra time or effort required. I manage to get around 4oz per day, not as much as using a proper pump but enough for odd days away etc.

Not sure how 'other' changed to 'inheritance'!

I don't believe most people have time to express - I certainly didn't, and my babies wouldn't take a bottle either. I certainly couldn't have left them to go to a wedding until they were we'll over one.

I'm more saying you are wrong to try or wrong to want to go the wedding- not at all, if you can then you should by all means. But don't feel defeated if you can't, it's not a particularly realistic expectation for you you be able to attend without your baby at this stage. It's a shame the couple can't be more accommodating.

Just some solidarity that I never, ever found time to express. For a short while, I got up at 3am to pump, but it was completely unsustainable. I think if you have a baby who can be put down for nap it may work, but otherwise it’s really, really difficult. As a last ditch, could you buy a pot of hypoallergenic formula and see if it works? It’s expensive but it might be worth a shot for one weekend. Does your DC already take a bottle? Because that could be an issue as well.

It’s such a shame your LO can’t come to the wedding - personally if babies in arms aren’t invited, I don’t think it’s unreasonable at all to decline, even at short notice (assuming you accepted the invite prior to the birth of your DC). You have no idea how it’s going to be prior to your DCs birth.

Sorry my post should say you are NOT wrong to try... wish there was an edit button!!

Feel for you. Feeling stressed about it may hamper supply too. Anyway you can take baby to wedding? Or anyone who can babysit nearby so you can go breastfeed. Otherwise I personally wouldn't go. I'd find it too stressful to be worth it.

I do have a haakaa @Wingingitsince2018. I’ve not got much using it in the past but I’ll try again as little and often would at least be something.

To be honest, I think you’re right @Whatafielddayfortheheat. Everyone around me seems to think I’m mad for thinking I can’t leave him. With 2 under 2 and the pandemic, I’ve only been out without kids a few times so part of me does want to go. But mostly I don’t really want to leave him yet, he clearly still needs me!

Sorry, some responses didn’t load before I initially replied. The Dr said they can prescribe formula if I need it so I’ll call back and discuss that.

He won’t take a bottle but we’ve only tried with formula before the CMPA issue came up. So the plan was to try again with expressed milk.

I’m feeling a bit tired and emotional so not best placed to make any decisions today but want to let the couple know asap as the wedding is only a month away now.

It's so frustrating OP. I ended up in tears several times over expressing, because it was supposed to be so easy and friends told me how they were out and about leaving the baby behind from just a few weeks. Meanwhile, I struggled to get anything out, and DD refused a bottle of any type. She was stuck to my boob for the first three months and I couldn't have got a pump in edgeways!

The only time I found to express successfully was when I went back to work at 5 months - I could close my office door and blinds. But I only lasted a few weeks.

It's a total pain and not nearly as easy and convenient as is sometimes made out, so don't feel bad about it.

With the haakaa, have you tried kind of folding the top over before putting it on to increase the suction? I get virtually nothing if I just squeeze the base but get about an ounce of milk each time if I fold the top over too. (See 1:45 in the video to explain what I mean: )

If you could save up a bit of a stash using the haakaa then you wouldn't need to set aside extra time to pump.

Thanks for your kind words everyone, I needed a lift today.

That’s useful, thanks @shangelawasrobbed. Wedding aside, it would be nice to be able to pop out, to get my hair cut for example, knowing DP could feed him if needed.