6 yr old DD won’t go to bed and refusing to go school

[Mam576]

I’m at my wits end tonight. 6 yr old broke her arm few months ago so I let her stay in my bed as didn’t want her going up and down ladder. Since then, she’s become super clingy. She won’t go to sleep unless I’m lying with her. I’m so stressed out - feel like all my evenings are gone! Apart from the 2 nights she stays at her dads.

Then because she is tired, mornings are such a battle. She kicks off massively with getting dressed, cries all morning about not wanting to go to school. I’ve asked her what’s bothering. And she said she misses me, the day is too long and the work is too hard. She’s got a lovely teacher and lovely group of friends.

Does anybody have any advice on what has worked regarding bedtimes/ less stressful mornings. I run into work so stressed out every morning and have a very professional job, it takes me a while before I feel I can function.

I’m currently lying with her now because she’s still awake and I need her to fall asleep soon otherwise mornings are going to be harder and more stressful than they currently are.

So first steps are to break the cycle with the sleeping. Starting by not lying down but sitting on the bed. Be calm, but clear, you will not be lying down but you promise to stay till she falls asleep. Tell her you won't be chatting just sitting with her, ignore any attempts at getting you to lie down or tantrums just keep it calm and stick to your guns. Then slowly over the course of several nights move to a chair. Then hopefully that will see her drop off to sleep without you next to her. (Getting her back to her bed can wait till you've got her calm about going to sleep by herself, so to speak. School is probably stressful due to people being their and not etc etc with Covid but I reckon once you crack the sleep everything will feel less stressful and mornings will calm down again.
Also maybe get her to help you to lay out everything for the following morning and school before bedtime, so clothes are ready to go etc. Hope you get your evenings back soon.

What do school say about how she is when she is there?

What year is she in?

What year is she in?

@Pashazade thank you, I will try that tomorrow evening. Some nights she will fall asleep with me downstairs so I know she can do it but most nights are a battle at the moment.

@Scarby9 school day she is absolutely fine. But she comes home and tells me she cried for me in school so I’m not always sure. When she comes home she lays out all her soft toys and plays school with them and she says when she’s older she wants to be a year 2 teacher so it can’t be that bad. I think it’s more the separation anxiety.

@toomuchlaundry she’s in Year 2 - so think she’s feeling the pressure with the SATs

@Mam576 they shouldn't be putting pressure on in respect of SATs but work does ramp up in Y2, especially with the amount they may have missed in the last 2 years