Toddler constantly passing germs to baby

[Bluemamma]

Hi mums, I have a 3 year old in creche and a 4 month old at home. The poor baba never seems to get a break, our toddler constantly has minor colds or tummy bugs etc - he is big and strong child so doesn’t effect him much at all thank god. But the baby is a different story, he was in hospital with RSV at 3 weeks, and since then had a tummy bug and a cold and now he has another cold and a raised temperature. Obviously trying to keep the two of them apart but it’s impossible as the toddler wants to give baby a cuddle every day and you know daily life etc… just not possible. I’m sick of constantly being worried, anyone else in the same boat?

Unfortunately it’s very normal.

I feel your pain. I have a 3yo (Ds1) in mursery who never caught a cold until he was 8 or 9 months. I also have a 6mo (ds2) who has had more colds than months he has been born.

Fortunately for us, he hasn't been too bad with them but he suffers sleepless nights and very cranky days when he has them. He has to sleep on my chest and I am completely frazzled with the endless cycle🥴.

Like you say, you can't keep them apart.

If it makes you feel any better, the challenges to your baby's immune system now, will help in the long run as they get older, at school etc. I have 4 children and my oldest, who didn't have much contact with germs/bugs in the first 2 years of her life, definitely seems to suffer more than the others now, with whatever is going round between them. The younger three, who were faced with bugs from day 1 from their older sibling (from nursery), seem much more robust these days.

We're in a similar situation; my 3 yo started nursery in September and has brought lots of bugs and colds home. She'd hardly been ill before and it is unfortunately shared with my 11 month old and us too. It's frustrating but I like to think that in the long run it will help both of their immune systems after 2 years of not seeing anyone/going many places. I try and teach my 3 yo to cover her mouth when she coughs/sneezes and to wash her hands, but it's not always easy!

I have a 6 and 9 year old and an 8 month old baby. She's had a cold on and off since October. When school is off for example Christmas she's better, soon as they go back to school the next week all snotty nosed again. I'm so fed up for her the poor baby.

Thanks everyone, obviously I don’t want anyones babies to be sick and I wish all your babies were nothing but healthy. But it is good to know that I’m not the only one finding it hard

Yes. Dd5 has always got a cold and so does the baby. I don't think he knows what's it like to be able to breathe freely through his nose. I think it's more important that they bond so I don't ask DD to stay away as they both love their cuddles. I asked her not to cuddle him only when I thought she had COVID but tjst was quite pointless she she kept coughing on him anyway.

I too tell myself it will help build his immunity m

@ForksAndSpoons yeah exactly, my mum just keeps telling me I have to totally separate baby and toddler but I don’t want to do it! I can’t be saying to my 3 year old son “oh don’t touch the baby” “don’t go near the baby”. For me it’s far more important that they bond and the toddler loves his brother instead of being scared/too afraid to go near him

Is your mum daily looking after the toddler or baby while you look after other child elsewhere, to help keep them separate?

if not, then her advice isn't very useful, is it?

You can't realistically keep them apart and you are right, they need to bond. I think you just have to ride it out. But RSV is terrifying, let alone at only 3 weeks, and it's natural to worry after that so be kind to yourself as well.