Baby waking up inconsolable

[IzzySo]

Hi fellow mums,

My daughter is almost 7 months. I aim to put her into bed by 6:30-7. She wakes up at 8:30 screaming the most horrible loud scream I have ever heard in my life. If I pick her up - it’s 50-50, some nights she’s all smiles and happy, other nights shes inconsolable. Whether she’s screaming or calm she will stay awake till 11pm. Then after that do her usual ever 2h waking - but less horrible screaming. It’s the most bizarre thing ( to me) I have no idea why this happens and haven’t experienced it before with my other baby or nephews/nieces. It’s specifically the 8:30pm cry that sounds horrible. Her other cries are not as bad, and in the day time she doesn’t cry much at all. If I put her in her bed she remains calm and plays till she falls asleep. When she wakes up in the morning - again she stays calm and plays till I pick her up. There’s something specific to her about 8:30pm that makes her scream like a banshee.

I’m feeling really stressed and at the end of my tether. I don’t get enough sleep. And even if I would try to sleep when she does in the early evening she still wakes up screaming by 8pm.

Please anybody know what I can do?

Could be a night terror.

How long has it been going on?

My DD had similar, probably at around 10/11 months. She’d wake up absolutely beside herself at about 10pm each night. She’d writhe and thrash if we held her, but ask to be picked up if we put her in the cot. The only way to calm her was to sit on her bedroom floor (not too close to her, that enraged her more) and quietly play with one of her toys. Very gradually she’d calm down and curiosity would take over and she’d crawl over to join in. We had to treat her like an animal we didn’t want to spook though, if we reacted to her interest before she’d come over she’d start up again. After she’d calmed down we played quietly for a little bit and then she was so tired from all the screaming we’d be able to put her back in her cot and she’d fall asleep.

It was awful, but it stopped as suddenly as it started. It maybe lasted a few weeks/maybe a month and a half.

My DS had allergies and pain every night. Have you looked into reflux? Maybe it's dinner time related

@Fallagain I thought night terrors started later - at toddler age?

@SickAndTiredAgain
thanks for sharing your experience. That sounds really tough. And I can mostly relate, though sometimes my daughter is calm if I pick her up. Often though she’s inconsolable and nothing helps. This has been going on for about a week now.

@morepatiencerequired I thought it might be reflux too, but if it’s reflux I would expect her to be upset all the time, sometimes she wakes up screaming but is calm and playful once I pick her up. If it was reflux I would expect her to continue screaming.

I thought she was waking up due to hunger, but I don’t think this can be the case anymore because I’ve started her on solids and she eats before bed.

I’m already apprehensive about what’s going to be happen tonight. I wake up at 6am, and I feel exhausted by 7-8pm yet I know she’s going to be screaming at that time. By the time she calms down and goes back to bed, I feel so nervous and awash with stress form hearing her scream the last several hours that I can’t go to sleep easily.

Personally I'd try waking her up completely when she wakes at 8.30 and then starting from scratch again. So put on some music, favourite singing teddy etc and do something really distracting to reset and see if that helps. I agree it sounds like a nightmare, which can start from five months I think.

If she doesn't kick her legs in discomfort on her back and can easily settle at other times it's unlikely to be silent reflux.

@IzzySo My son had multiple allergies. Most had obvious signs (eg anaphylaxis). One (wheat protein) turned out to be giving him ear infections and keeping him awake every night. He ate v little wheat (but regularly) and it was a long journey to getting to identifying the issue. For 18 months, every single night he would go to bed and then wake at around 11 and be inconsolable unless he was sat up with me. At around 2 or 3 in the morning I would be able to get him back to bed. He seemed 'happy' when he was awake with me but would be terrible once I put him down again (until around 2 or 3). I was tearing my hair out trying to find the reason for the ear infections and from a random google suggestion cut out all wheat. Within 48 hours he started sleeping through the night every single night. I literally had never had that before except once when we travelled to Australia for a fortnight and I'd thought it was jet lag (coincidentally hadn't eaten wheat - I later checked the food diary). He didn't show any reflux symptoms, I still don't know what he actually felt, but I didn't want to jump straight to 'allergies' because that seemed a step too far. He also never had another ear infection until I did a trial and gave him wheat again.

Food proteins can pass through breast milk, milk proteins are in formula. If you think there might be a chance (risk is higher if you or dad have asthma or eczema), then I suggest you start a food diary with everything ingested and moods/symptoms. if you're breastfeeding, it needs to include what you're eating.

Best of luck! Many of us know the despair of not sleeping enough, I really hope it passes quickly for you.