Sad about my dd and grandparents

[lollipoprainbow]

We are a tiny family anyway and my dd9 is usually fine. My mum her beloved nanny is in a home with dementia and my dd broke down last saying she misses her. Her other granny is in a care home and they aren't close and both her grandpas are gone. I feel very hard done by that my dd doesn't have any grandparents or poorly ones whilst everyone else I know with kids still have 4 sets. Sorry to rant just feel a bit bitter this morning and sad for my dd.

Just me then !!

No, we're in a similar position. Much loved and very engaged Granny died when DD was 8. Her ex husband (my Dad) still alive but complete waste of space. Has seen DD less than 10 times in her whole life (she's 14). Other Grandad who was nice also dead. Other Granny has never been close and is in a care home and doesn't always recognise us.
I have lovely memories of time spent with my GP and I feel sad DD will never have that.

Yup. It's tricky and emotional. There's no way of changing it though. It might help to talk about nice things they've done together in the past or if your child has an interest they shared talk about that and how xyz would have loved/enjoy what they are doing.

Thanks both, my dd and her were so close, my mum looked after from 9 months when I went back to work. They had a lovely bond until 5 years when I lost my sister and my mum got dementia.

We were in a very similar situation when DM went into a care home following a massive stroke. It is so very difficult to explain to a child about ill health (DM is now on end of life care) and the fact that DGM isnt going to get better whilst you're worried and grieving for your own relationship with your parent. My older lovely next door neighbour has sort of stepped into the GM role for DC (she has DGC of a similar age who go to the same school and so once a week all 4 DC do their homework and cook tea together etc after school). It's not the same as having her gran but it does help her. Does she have an aunt or other relative who she spends time with?
Other PP might have an idea of books that could help your DD?

@Chocolateis1ofyour5aday thanks, the only other close female relative was my sister who we sadly lost five years ago. It worries me that if god forbid anything happened to me she wouldn't have that female influence.

It is sad my DS's have 4 Grandparents that don't give a shit about them, I'm not sure which is worse.

We're very lucky that both myself and DH still have all the parents alive and reasonably well so they have had the chance to form good relationships with our children. I was very close to my gran growing up, grandparents and their grandchildren have a very special connection and I'm grateful my children have had that in their lives. I would have been very sad if this had not been the case so I appreciate how you must feel OP. I'm sure however DD has lots of love around her and as she grows you can share stories, memories and photos of the grandparents with her so that they still feel real and connected to her.