Missing my ds

[Azzie]

I'm being a bit feeble here I know...

My ds (just 5) is spending his first few days on his own with Granny this half term, and I'm missing him terribly. Admittedly life is much easier with only one child (even if that child is my militant almost-3-going-on-16 dd ) but the house is so quiet without ds. Last night he rang up from Granny's, but he didn't really want to talk to me or dh, he wanted to tell his sister about everything he'd done that day (I will admit it was rather sweet,the two of them talking to one another on the phone).

Dh isn't helping - he keeps saying "just imagine what it will be like when he leaves home for good" . He doesn't understand that this is my dear litle first baby we're talking about....

[kkgirl]

Azzie

I know what you mean. well I don't actually, because the grandparents are too elderly to take any of mine of our hands for any time at all, but on the odd occassion when we go out, or once they went to Kids Klub for the day while we caught up with some badly needed decorating. It is so quiet and you feel so lost you don't really know what to do.
I took mine to Escape from Parents yesterday at the Leisure Centre while I went to work. I felt like the worst mother ever, even though they had a great time.
The hard bit I think is to realise that they are growing up and they won't need us so much and will want to do their own thing. Still if I were you I would keep as busy as possible and concentrate on some time with your ds. With mine I love having just one to entertain, because they are so good on their own and you can devote 100% whereas with three its chaos
Good Luck

[Tillysmummy]

I haven't got there yet but can imagine how your feeling Azzie. Men just don't understand ! Cheer up, he'll be back soon and some men never really grow away, my dh still speaks to MIL every day !

[SoupDragon]

I know how you feel. My Precious First Born (PFB) is due to start school next September and I'm dreading it. We're choosing schools at the moment and I'm an emotional wreck! I cried at one school's summer fun day at the thought of my PFB starting there (the school was fine, it was just the thought of "losing" him)

My DHs mother cried when he started university. But that's probably not much help is it...!

We spend a lot of time complaining about them, mourning our lost freedom, wishing they'd go away and leave us alone occasionally and then we can't bear to see them go anywhere! Soppy aren't we?

Think what a wonderful greeting you'll get when he comes back though.

[Azzie]

Yes, my dh and my MIL have a really good relationship - I hope that ds and I manage to do the same in years to come (he's so lovely at the moment, it breaks my heart to think of him turning into a monosyllabic parent-hating teenager ). When MIL got broken into recently while she was on holiday, dh hotfooted it up to hers, fitted window locks on everything, organised police, burglar alarm quotes etc, and made sure he was there when she got home and stayed with her for the first couple of nights to make sure she was OK. I hope ds will do that sort of thing for me if I ever need it.

[Azzie]

I do have a sort of low-level background anxiety about MIL driving ds safely down from hers to our house tomorrow (cue B-movie scenarios of dreadful pile-ups on the A1). Completely daft, the woman is a very good driver and loves ds almost as much as I do.

[janh]

Azzie, I know how you feel - and Soupdragon's MIL when her DS started university, the first time away ever is one huge step, and going to university is the beginning of the end of them living at home at all, shuddering sob - BUT on the other hand think what a good job you've done bringing him up secure and confident so that he is happy to stay at Granny's, doesn't desperately need to talk to you for ressurance, and loves his sister enough to want to talk to her (and show off, probably!)

(Your DH sounds like he is winding you up....send him to clean the loo again. Without the brush.)

[WideWebWitch]

Azzie, know how you feel: my ds goes to his dad every other weekend and often for half terms and holidays. For me the first few days are great (the freedom, the lie ins etc) but after that I do miss him. And he NEVER wants to talk to me on the phone, neither does he want to talk to his dad or granny on the phone when he's here. So it's a boy thing I reckon, practising for the brief phone conversations they'll have when they're older Sympathy though. Still, way to go yet before he leaves home, isn't he 5?!!!

[Azzie]

Ds and MIL have just arrrived here - ds is very pleased to see me, full of everything he's done (especially having lunch at Burger King) and generally large and bouncy, and MIL has gone for a lie-down because she's feeling quite tired.

Nice to have him back. And MIL is babysitting tonight so dh and I can go out for a meal .