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Parenting

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Original poster

How do i stop breastfeeding a 17 month old?

17 replies

ballerinaqueen · 30/01/2022 17:15

DD has been exclusively breastfed and will scratch at my neck and cry until i feed her I've managed to wean her down to twice a day, sometimes once but she would feed around the clock if i let her.

Has anyone experience of stopping at this age? Should i go cold turkey?

She's totally fine when she's not with me and I've stayed away overnight without her and she's fine, it's just when she sees me she wants to feed

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thinkningaboutit · 30/01/2022 17:38

I've recently just done this with my 16 month old who would also feed round the clock if allowed. A few things that worked for us

Only feeding at bedtime in his room
Having a fun distraction when he asked
I went away for two nights
Dad putting to bed

It was surprisingly easier than I was expecting, there were a lot of tears in the first few days which was tough but he's totally fine now.

Good luck !

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 30/01/2022 19:04

DH usually puts her to bed which definitely helps, I usually give her a feed first thing in the morning as it we means we can all lie on in bed a bit longer. After a few days of tears did you DS keep asking for a feed? I'm reluctant to stop if she's going to cry and fuss for weeks or months, but if it was a week i would persevere. She seems to get so much comfort from it that it's hard to say no 😔

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SamanthaVimes · 30/01/2022 19:11

I haven’t totally stopped bf but I night weaned DD at 17 months and was surprised how quickly she got used to the idea. Obviously she was upset but I comforted her and gave cuddles and it only took her a couple of nights.

I was expecting it to be awful but felt I had to (I’m pregnant and her being latched all night was killing me) but it wasn’t as bad as I thought. She had enough understanding to know that milk had gone to sleep (even if she wasn’t happy about it).

I’ve kept the morning feed (like you to gain a bit of extra time in bed!)

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Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 30/01/2022 19:29

I was able to drop the night feeds ages ago as she's an amazing sleeper (unlike my son 🤦‍♀️)

It's so easy to feed in the morning and sometimes i do give in during the day. There's a medication I can't use until i stop breastfeeding and tbh i just feel done with it all!

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RandomMess · 30/01/2022 19:41

I think you need to be firm and say "no" and mean it.

Would she understand "all gone"?

Could you commit to breaking the morning habit my getting out of bed rather than the usual routine?

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 30/01/2022 20:05

I think I do need to be firmer, I have said no before and she cried and shook her head, so she understood. I think I'm going to have to get up early with her which I'm not sure if I have the willpower for right now though!

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ooosnedh · 30/01/2022 20:18

@ballerinaqueen
I felt exactly the same when I was trying to drop the morning feed...it was so easy to just bring her into my bed and have lazy cuddles whilst she fed and I could shut my eyes for a bit longer 😆 but yes I did have to start getting up and take her downstairs instead and tbh it wasn't that bad.
Our last feed was the bedtime feed which she was obsessed with and I thought we would never be able to stop. It randomly happened one night when she was 18 months and we went away for two nights and maybe it was the change in routine/being away but she didn't ask for a bedtime feed. Once back home she did ask again but I just distracted her etc and tbh she wasn't that bad. I stayed firm though as could have quite easily fed her and gone back into our old routine so there were some tears etc from her but she was getting to the age where she understood when I said milk all gone now.

RandomMess · 30/01/2022 20:20

Get your husband to support you by getting up with her

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 30/01/2022 21:46

That's a fair point, even if we split it 50/50

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Alitlebitsleepy · 30/01/2022 22:31

Following as I'm wondering how I'll manage to stop feeding my 17mo...🙃

2littleloves · 31/01/2022 09:06

My 19 month old was feeding around 5 times a night and wanting fed during the day, he was not accepting dropping feeds as since he's born I've always fed him on demand. I found out I was pregnant again when he was 17 months and was so sick I had no choice but to go cold turkey. A few cranky days and nights but plenty of distraction and he never even so much as looked after 4 days. It's ended up being the best thing for him as although he's always been a good eater he's brilliant with food now and sleeps all night which he had never done. Good luck with whatever route you take xx

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 31/01/2022 19:59

I've had a discussion with DH, he agreed to split the mornings 50/50, so hopefully it'll go ok 🤞

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Yahyahs22 · 31/01/2022 20:39

Cold turkey is the best for a quicker fix. They get it waaay quicker and stop asking sooner. Pick a day you're going to stop for good and stick to it.
You don't have to use distractions, a no is sufficient. "No were not doing that anymore." Then " I said no more, remember?" Then the last one, " the answer stays the same. No more" then asking gets ignored and clawing and pulling, remove them from you. I found this method to work in 3 days. Miracle.

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 01/02/2022 22:14

Thanks everyone, I'm going to update as i go along in case anyone comes across the thread when looking for advice.
First day of no feeds today. Instead of bringing DD into bed I brought her into the bathroom and ran her a bath, she refused a bath and was a little upset but then fine when i got her dressed. She tried grabbing at my top at dinner time but was easily distracted and went to bed fine

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Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 04/02/2022 22:36

Day 5 and I'm surprised how well it's went, I've been able to distract her when she wants a feed. I'm still producing milk as I've had a bit of leakage today, the only downside is that my hormones have been crazy, I've been very emotional which happened when I stopped breastfeeding my son, the worst was day 2 and 3 but feeling more positive now

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dreamygirl25 · 04/02/2022 22:43

Reading this thread with interest! I stopped about 18/19 months and it gradually went down to every other day to every three/four days. I found what helped cut the feeds shorter was using the nice close opportunity of cleaning ds's ears while he was feeding! Put him right off! He did have a bottle of cows milk available to him whenever he wanted it and only ever breastfed for about 2 minutes towards the end. I do miss the sitting still having a cuddle sometimes.

Original poster

ballerinaqueen · 10/02/2022 07:38

On to day 11, my right breast still has milk as it's a bit hard and I'm really hoping i dry up soon. I'm excited though as I'm going to contact my gp today and changing my psoriasis treatment as i was recommended a topical treatment but I was told I can only use it when I've stopped breastfeeding DD.
She was very cranky on Tuesday and scratched my neck when pulling at my jumper but she was very happy yesterday, and was easily distracted with a few quavers 😂

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