Helping children to make friends

[Nina2022]

My little boy has just started reception, he is one of the youngest in the class and seems to be struggling with making friends.

He comes across as very confident because he talks well with adults as that is what he is used to, but school is completely new to him.

He is very happy when a child joins him to play but is too nervous to ask classmates to play and is very worried about joining in with groups of kids playing - he really wants some help (his words).

He is now getting very sad, emotional and having angry outbursts which is unlike him but obviously doesn't help the situation. I have spoken to his teacher and was told that he seems quite happy playing alone (but he is not). At pick up he seems stressed out and is getting more reluctant to go to school because he feels lonely and sad.

I was looking into groups outside of school e.g. football or something but am worried they will seem quite daunting in his current state.

Does anyone know of any groups where kids can get experience of playing and joining in with help and supervision to build confidence. Or anything I can do, classes he can attend to build confidence to make friends.

Thanks

Does he have anything he is interested in swimming, football, rugby, cubs type of thing, dancing, drama, singing, climbing, running, cricket etc.

Do they still have class party’s with covid? As if they did you could maybe see if he plays with anyone then or get talking to one of the nicer mums and arrange a play date or a meet up at a local park or something. It must be awful for kids of this age with the couple of years we have just had. Mine are both teens now.

Can you initiate play dates with the other parents?

I have spoken to his teacher and was told that he seems quite happy playing alone (but he is not).

Well, that doesn’t sound like a very empathetic or useful response!

School should certainly support with this. Our primary school ‘buddies’ the reception children with the year 6’s and that works really well - they act as play leaders and do a lot of informally sorting squabbles and getting them all involved in games. Is there anything similar at your school - a ‘buddy bench’ where you can sit if you want company?

At this age, inviting children individually for play dates at your house is definitely worth doing.

Thanks so much for your responses which have really helped with confidence xxxx