Coping with newborn and toddler - tips please

[Dramaqueen14]

Looking for some advice really. DC1 has just turned 2 and I had DC2 last week so very early days. At the minute I’m very lucky to have my DH still on paternity leave and lots of help from family.

Just wondering how people manage to look after a toddler and a newborn on their own. My hormones are raging just now, breastfeeding not going to plan and I’m getting anxious about how I will cope on my own when the time comes. Any tips very welcome.

No real tips, but my DD was 13 months when DS came along and you just cope. I know that's probably not much help to you, but honestly the thought of having both by myself was far worse than the reality.
Maybe try and include her in looking after baby?
Can you get mummy a nappy?
Can you get mummy the wipes? Etc

And invest in a sling if you don't already have one! Both DC have slept in ours while I did chores of played with the older one. S daunting as it can be, try and get out of the house for a little bit each day, fresh air helps massively with your mood and will do your toddler the world of god not to be cooped up all day. Even just 20 minutes at the local park does wonders for my DD attitude if she's woken up in a grump 😂

But good luck and enjoy it! DS is now 6 months! They grow too fast so save every stressful minute!

My son was 3 and a bit when my daughter was born (she's now 5 months) and I'll be honest it can be really tough some days but easier on others. It's a learning curve and you gradually piece together how to manage everything. Things that have really helped me are to structure the days/week and keep a routine where possible, make the effort to go out when you feel able (can be easier to manage two kids out of the house rather than in it some days) and to drop your standards on things which are less important as you just can't do everything sometimes.

Congratulations

I was in the same situation last year. My DD was 10 days off her second birthday when we bought her baby brother home. (Both have just had their birthdays so 3 and 1 now!)

My main tip would be to spend as much time with DC1 when DC2 is napping. I felt so guilty about splitting my time between them, so learned to try to make sure nap time was time for DC1 to get as much of my time as possible.

Another thing I found helped me and I still do now is get all their clothes etc out the night before, even coats and stuff if we are going out early. Bags anything you can prep in advance.

Leave the housework etc as much as you can(easier said than done!)

Definitely agree about getting out of the house too, luckily my DS loves a nap in the buggy so going on a walk or to the park helped him to sleep and DD loved it too!

Also I try to remind myself each day is a new day and don’t be hard on yourself if you’ve had a tricky day.

I couldve written this post OP. I have a 2 year old and 3month baby and it is damn hard so totally understand.

What keeps me sane is trying to get toddler and baby to nap at the same time. Going for walks with pram and baby in sling and leaving things for hub to do.

Otherwise get hub to look after kids and you sleep or have a hot soak whilst they are out.

Also dont be afraid to ask for help. Get your mum/friend/sister/aunt round to give you a couple hours to yourself. A nice cuppa tea and biccy, self care is so important for mums with newborn. Look after yourself. Hope these tips help in some way! Good luck x

Go with the flow. Mine are 2 years and 3 weeks apart, dd1 was diagnosed with dyspraxia the day before dd2 was born (and autism later that year, she was tricky!) but it wasn't that bad. I was on my own from day 3 as no paternity in the USA then - and I only got 2 weeks sick leave (no maternity) from my job.

We went out a lot as that was easier, toddler groups etc and lots of assessments so dd2 just had to go with the flow. Electronic babysitter when required, dd1 knew all her letters from Sesame Street.

Don't sweat the small stuff.

Pick your battles

Let some standards drop- does everything need to be perfect?

Get out of the house with baby in the pram.

Get the toddler involved. They can fetch and carry, put stuff away, 'read' baby a story

It does get easier