Just doing everything wrong atm

[UpToMyEye]

I am really really struggling atm
I feel like every I’m failing in every aspect of parenting and all I do is shout at and tell off the kids
I am absolutely drained with it all and just want to run away

They scream and shout and screech connnnnnnstantly
I mean constantly
Nobody does their chores
They don’t pick up after themselves
Mornings are a shit show because nobody gets dressed in under 50-60 minutes
One of them won’t eat
The older ones refuse to take any responsibility for themselves - if I didn’t tell them they wouldn’t wash or brush teeth or take their inhaler or scan their glucose monitor ever
The smallest won’t sleep
The middle has adhd and is … well completely feral tbh and I get phone calls from school almost every day

I just don’t want to be a parent anymore
It’s fucking shit and I’m shit at it

Where do I even start fixing this?!

I didn’t want to read and run. 💐 🍫 🍷

As mum to two teens I feel the same it was very much easier when they were both babies and to rub salt in the wounds most of the time chilled out laid back dad can do no wrong either.

I am not much better but when I am calm the advice I would give is;

1. Try and keep calm as if you loose it you also loose all respect if you loose your cool (but none of us are perfect and they know which buttons to press and don’t make it easy for us).
2. pick your battles wisely otherwise you will be sick of your own voice and will end up loosing all battles.
3. cut yourself some slack.
4. you sound stressed can your partner support you more if you have one or can you take yourself off for a quiet bath and glass of wine, a night out, a coffee with a good friend when they are at school, an exercise class, try 5 minutes or 20 online meditation. Or could you pay for a cleaner to minimise your stress and workload, get food shopping delivered (if you don’t already) etc or could you be menopausal or peri menopausal cause that can make you loose your shit and feel much less nurturing? If so a visit to the doctors and insist on HRT might help.

@UpToMyEye
In the morning with getting ready have them get ready before coming down stairs no TV or what ever they do until dressed.

Really the same with chores, home from school homework done then chores and not else until its all done, if they don't do it they get no screen time or what ever they like to do.