17 month old won't go to his dad

[waveydays]

So my 17 month old is soooo clingy to me when it comes to his dad. So we are together. He doesn't work late or doesn't go away for his job. But my son just won't have anything to do with him. I'm pregnant with our second child and I just can't do everything myself anymore. Starting to really resent my partner as it just feels like I have to do everything. Any advice

I honestly think you and your DP just need to pick some simple tasks they do together automatically as a routine.

Dp can do bathtime every night, and also a visit to the park every Saturday morning, and a weekly walk to the shop for bread and milk etc.

Ds will get used to it.

It's really normal for a toddler to express a preference for one parent or the other. It doesn't mean that parent gets away with doing nothing! Your DP needs to get stuck in with bedtime, bath time etc and keep providing reassurance until this phase is over.

It’s totally normal for them to go through phases of having a favourite. In our house we’ve just never gone along with it. As you’re finding it’s not fair on one parent to do it all and it breeds resentment. Plus with new baby on the way he’s going to have to get used to Dad doing more because you’ll have the new baby so it’s far better to get him used to it now so it doesn’t end up being a sibling issue.

Presuming your DP is a capable parent that is willing to pull his weight, I’d tell LO Daddy is doing bedtime and then remove myself. Go sit in the bedroom, or if you think you might struggle to stay out of it if there is upset then I’d go out for a walk or even read a book in the car.

DH and I always took turns for bath time, bedtime stories, naptime at the weekend etc. If DS protested, we said firmly 'it's daddy's turn, mummy tomorrow' and carried on. We had a few tantrums but then he was fine. We still alternate (he's almost 5 and we have 2yo twins too) and it's no issue for any of the kids.