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Parenting

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Original poster

My 8 mo the old STILL doesn't sleep through the night

53 replies

frodojodo · 21/01/2022 22:00

I just want someone to tell me that they have also experienced this with their child...

My 8 month old has NEVER slept any longer than 3 hours during the night since birth. No joke. I've done 8 months of sleepless nights and I'm really exhausted now lol!! I've tried everything, well I think I have anyway..

We have a bedtime routine, bath, feed, bed. She acts very sleepy and usually goes down around 7pm without too much of a fuss but then is awake every couple of hours until 6:15am the next morning. She isn't hungry as I offer her a feed but she's not interested, she's still sleepy when she wakes as well.. it's almost like she's in discomfort or something, she fusses and cries and then falls back asleep.. then repeats every 30/45 mins. She sometimes gives me a stretch of 3hrs but that's the most. I make sure her nappy is dry and she is a good temperature too.

Any advice would be great!

Ps- please don't say 'get someone to help or take her for the night' that's not an option. I'm a single parent:)

OP posts:

LiG123 · 22/01/2022 02:46

Awake with just 12m here! Did exactly the same as my angel sleepy first so just accepting some kids dont sleep!?

MmmmIsee · 22/01/2022 07:29

Is she bf? If so it's totally normal, dont compare to formula fed babies as they sleep a lot more. Is she teething maybe? Or learning a new skill, one of mine was walking around at 10 months which was fun..... Is she starting to crawl or stand as at new skills cause nightwakes ime

kittykat33 · 22/01/2022 07:30

Small babies and toddlers aren't designed to sleep through the night. My 2 year old isn't sleeping through yet. It's biologically normal but we as a culture just don't accept it.

At the 2-2.5yr check they ask if they're waking more than 3 times a night if that gives you a steer of what's normal.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

6-9 months old Babies & sleep Children's sleep Families

MmmmIsee · 22/01/2022 07:31

Its totally normal though op, none of mine slept through at 8 months and it took years for one to sleep through although loads of good sleep phases in between..it will get better. Might well not be possible but can u nap during the day?

trevthecat · 22/01/2022 07:34

Oh in this country we are made to believe babies sleep through so early. I have 3, first two didn't sleep through till nearly 3 years and the youngest was about 11 months. Most babies don't sleep through at 8m.

GiantSpider · 22/01/2022 07:35

I agree it's normal, sorry OP. I have three DC and two of them were still waking every night at this age.

Cattitudes · 22/01/2022 07:44

Sleeping through sometimes will probably come fairly soon. Sleeping through fairly reliably I would say around 3-4yrs old. Always sleeping through without ever coming into you has to wait until their level of embarrassment at waking you up and crawling into your bed outweighs their need to see you. Still waiting for that at age 12 to be honest.

It does get better but in the meantime get your partner to do some of the daytime shifts and they have to go out so you can get a few hours sleep.

starsinthegutter · 22/01/2022 07:47

Mine didn't, they did eventually and so will she. Maybe book a hotel room for a night and get her dad to take her.

starsinthegutter · 22/01/2022 07:49

Sorry OP, just re read your post. She will sleep through eventually but sleep deprivation is maddening. Sending love ❤

Tee20x · 22/01/2022 07:50

Mine is almost 13 months and doesn't. She's a lot better now and wakes up once or twice but that means I get a stretch of 5-6 hours sometimes more so I can't complain too much.

Also I'm co-sleeping so "wake ups" are so brief that they don't really affect me as I don't have to fully wake up or move to go anywhere which is good

Justgettingbye · 22/01/2022 07:52

Does she have a dummy or comforter of some sort?

buzzandwoodyallday · 22/01/2022 07:53

I got up to my 2 year old 5 times last night and my DP got up to him twice. At 8 months old, there's a sleep regression as well so that won't be helping. My 3 year old now sleeps through most nights but at 8 months we were up to the both of them anywhere up to 10 times a night.

You may want to lower your expectations I'm afraid!

RedToothBrush · 22/01/2022 08:08

@Catch32

Sorry but mine didn't start sleeping through until the 4/5 years old mark. And tbh, I didn't know many parents who had babies that were sleeping through at 18 months, let alone 8 months. Only advice I can give is co-sleeping, which maximised the amount of sleep I got at that stage.

This.

Parents say their child sleeps through and when they talk a bit more you often find it was a one off.

Some children just don't sleep through until after they start school. This isn't abnormal.

Its just you rarely get honest responses about it. Just a lot of crap about 'why haven't you tried x' and a load of judgement. Including from HCP.

Tbh i found this the difficult bit. If I'd been told honest stuff and given advice about how to cope with my own sleep deprivation instead, i think it would have been a lot easier across the board.

BertieBotts · 22/01/2022 08:28

I'm sure I replied to this last night but perhaps I was dreaming :o

IME, it is normal for them not to be sleeping through yet at 8mo. I have three. DS1 did some longer stretches from early on, can't remember exactly when or how long, but only slept through occasionally from about 18mo and not reliably until 2.5y.

DS2 was the one who took ages to increase his sleep stretches and probably didn't sleep 4h in a row until he was over 1. Did not sleep through ever until 2.5y and then suddenly went from 3 wake ups to none. Then DS3 was born when he was 3 so for the next 4 months he woke up every night with bad dreams. That seems (touch wood) to be abating.

DS3 5mo has not slept through yet although has done some 6-7h stretches on occasion.

UpDownRound · 22/01/2022 08:44

Neither of mine did til 12 months and that was leaving them to cry and settle for about 10 mins. I know far more babies who didn't sleep through at 8 months than who did to be honest - not sure that helps but I really don't think it's unusual.

Alexahelp · 22/01/2022 09:30

I agree it’s totally normal not to be sleeping through but you might hope for a longer stretch by now. Mine never did longer than 3 hours till almost 8 months (health reasons) but once those were getting treated things started improving quite quickly. We then realised having 3 naps was making her not tired enough to sleep through - as soon as we dropped to two things got loads better at night and since then any regular problems have always been due to day sleep.

Picklesbaby · 22/01/2022 10:17

My ds didn’t sleep through till he was 14 months &that was a one off lol. Tbh we co slept till 18 months and then did gradual retreat sleep training it saved us , he wakes ups 1/2 times on the good nights now . If she’s not hungry could she be thirsty ? Pehaps some water ?
Hang in there it does get better

purplemunkey · 22/01/2022 10:29

Yes, sorry - as lot of others say it's pretty normal. Mine didn't sleep through til about 2.5yrs. It's hard, I know. But they do sleep through eventually.

BrambleRoses · 22/01/2022 10:36

While I agree that at eight months a lot of babies aren’t sleeping through, I do sometimes find these threads a little bit competitive in terms of tiredness and what people have to cope with. Most people aren’t up multiple times with four year olds.

@frodojodo DS slept through the night at nine months - for three nights. I was so excited then he stopped. He then slept through for four nights at ten months and what followed was utterly horrendous and we had just over two months of him going down at 8, waking two and a half hours later and point blank refusing to go back in his cot. Co sleeping didn’t work as he squirmed around all night. It made me quite depressed.

At 12 and a half months he started to sleep better. He’d go down at 8, wake at midnight and wake at 4 but I could get him back down and this made a huge difference as I was back in bed in twenty minutes. And then for the last two nights he’s slept through. He’s thirteen months.

thethoughtfox · 22/01/2022 10:53

You can buy a wedge to put under the mattress at the top so they are propped up slightly which helps with the reflux. You can use a couple of books in the meantime.

MmmmIsee · 22/01/2022 12:19

@BrambleRoses think pp are just being honest. I have 3 dcs and with two of them we had regular wakes until 3/4. If course there were good phases inbetween. We alsi had a great routine and are pretty firm as parents but we couldnt stop them waking in the night . So it is the reality for many tbh... It does get better but think its good to think if ways to cope till then.

MmmmIsee · 22/01/2022 12:20

*of ways

MmmmIsee · 22/01/2022 12:21

Also more kids means more wakes a night especially is closeish in age!

Peaplant20 · 22/01/2022 15:37

My 7mo still doesn’t sleep through, just some solidarity for you x

Bobbybobbins · 22/01/2022 15:41

Sorry OP it is really tough. Neither of mine slept through til 18 months. You are not alone

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