Good age for nursery?

[charcb]

Mums, I'd love your opinions. I was contemplating sending my 7 month old to nursery from asap. I asked the nursery for 1 day a week to give me some breathing space and allow me a chance to do housework, admin, etc, and ideally get a bit of a rest. We don't have family or a large network in the area so don't get much of a chance to get help. My baby is adorable but super demanding of attention and I barely get a moment to do anything else with him around as he will constantly whine / cry if not around. It's rare that he's occupied for long even if I sit him in the kitchen with me whilst doing bits and bobs which other mums seem to be able to do.

Nursery said they recommend a minimum of 2.5 days a week as otherwise babies don't adjust well. I'm not against it and I believe will pave the way for when I need to go back to work in 5 months. I've also been told it's easier to send a baby to nursery before separation anxiety hits at 9 months.

However I'm worried about his development if I send him this young to nursery. What's your views? Would this affect his development or even his emotional needs? Am I better off continuing as we are for as long as possible? The mum guilt is creeping in but I feel I'll be more able to care for him if I get a chance to recover and to organise our home / life when he's in nursery.

I wouldn't do w.5 days, but i would do either 2 of 3mornings. I fohnd frequency of going to nursery instead of lenvth ebetter for settling my dd. So same routine a few mornings, but pick up at lunch time, or vice versa and do pm sessions

The youngest any of my boys went was 9 months and he settled in so well and absolutely thrived.

I think they are right though, 1 day a week will make for a longer and harder settlement. My boy did 3 days and after a couple of sessions was absolutely fine. I would definitely recommend putting him in nursery will be great for both of you!

2.5-3.5 years is probably the best age to start nursery.

A good nursery won't do any harm to a baby's development before 2 though. Babies need to form strong attachments to the adult caring for them so a childminder or nanny is a better form of childcare in my opinion.

What about two mornings instead?

I put DS in nursery at 7mo for exactly the same reasons. However, I pulled him out again because he got a different illness after each of his settling sessions and came home with a tummy bug after his first paid session. At 7 mo he was too little to fight it off and with a blocked nose + tummy bug he couldn't eat or drink for several days. We ended up in hospital with him for dehydration and had to keep him home for 3 weeks with several scary days of near constant care/ medication day and night which was the opposite of why we did it. He still hasn't kicked the cough he caught there 3.5 months later after antibiotics and keeps us up at night coughing. I'm still on the nursery mailing list and they have had covid cases, slapped cheek and head lice since Xmas - not unusual I don't think. DS seemed happy, no separation anxiety or anything, and I did like the one half day of free time (my first since he was born) I got before it crashed down around my ears! Obviously they will get sick whenever they start childcare - it just completely backfired doing it in winter when I didn't have to for work and with DS being so tiny and milk-dependent and I hadn't appreciated just how poorly he could get from normal nursery bugs at that age. I'm now keeping him home until spring when there are hopefully fewer illnesses around and he's a bit bigger. It's actually got a lot easier in the last couple of months anyway - he suddenly got more independent. I'm not at all saying it's a bad idea - I wanted to do the same thing - just thought it worth sharing my experience.

Thanks mums for all the opinions - a lot to consider! I'll give this a think and check with nursery what's possible.

If not needed to work I wouldn't send them before 3yr when they get free hours.
Our eldest went 1.5 days a week at 15mth as I was working, family had her the other days.

A baby doesn't need to go to nursery, but it's absolutely fine for them to go.

The nursery are correct about more sessions being better for settling, but as pp said it's about frequency and not length of the day, so three mornings would be fine.

All babies catch a lot of bugs/viruses when they first start in a nursery. It is probably preferable to get this out the way before you go back to work (so that you can keep him home when he is sick etc. without taking time off work).

I personally believe that one on one or small group care is better for this age group so would look at a childminder or nanny instead of a nursery. But nursery is absolutely fine if that works best for you.

My baby went to nursery at 6 months for 2 days a week. Was fine. No issues with development. Walked at 12 months. Hes now nearly 2 and saying numerous words. Never had any attachment issues really. We've just been making 'peas' together with green playdoh.

But yes, agree with PP about minor illness. Nurseries are like petri dishes for resp and gastro bugs.

My DD went at 1 year old, she found it hard (as did I) for the first 3 months. Would cry every morning and was so unwell for 3 months but now she's happy and smiley going in.
She has come on leaps and bounds as they're a great nursery with a nice forest attached so lots of outdoor time that I wouldn't necessarily do with her or have access to.

She walked very well at 11 months and by 12 m she was moving all over, so she is very physical and maybe that helped as she felt independent to some degree rather than sat around waiting for adults to move her places? No issues with development at all though and no issues re attachment to me and DH.

Yes I agree that I'd like to get through the bugs before I go back to work so thought that would allow us some time! My hope also is that nursery will settle him into more of a routine. Currently (he's 7 months) he doesn't really have a nap routine and naps 3-4 times a day (for not long), the only thing that's set is bedtime - even in the mornings when he wakes up seems to vary somewhat so I'm excited to see if they can help with that so that we have a more predictable schedule.

He's not weaned though and doesn't know how to eat very well yet so Im wondering how it will go in that respect. I sense he's becoming more attached to me now so that's also a worry - been told best to get them in before 9 months when separation anxiety kicks in.

I started my DD at nursery when she was 11 months old and she's done 3 days a week ever since. She did get loads of illnesses but so far nothing to serious. There have been 2 covid cases in her room in the past couple of weeks and over 20 in the nursery but staff have said symptoms in babies/toddlers seem very mild so that's not worrying me really.
She took a while settling in but it's been 6 months and she loves going now. When I take her to toddler music/ dance groups on my days off she is super confident and follows instructions well compared to others around her age.
I have no family near by for childcare which is why I've sent her, but am so glad I did and will keep her in nursery while I'm on mat leave with my second