My nearly 3 year old thinks it's morning when she wakes up from her nap

[Elisabethrose95]

So we've been having this problem sometimes and it's starting to distress our child. She's totally convinced that when she goes to bed for a nap at 2pm, that it's actually a big night time sleep. Then sometimes when she wakes up from her nap at 4pm, she thinks it's the morning amd gets all upset...

I feel unreasonable telling her that she can't have a proper breakfast but if I keep giving her a proper breakfast, I'm scared that it'll perpatuate the idea that it's the morning to her and continue this cycle of upset.

I put her down for a nap in normal day time clothes, and we don't brush her teeth but for some reason it just isn't clicking for her... Any suggestions? Anyone else who has gone through this?

I think its odd an almost 3 year old is having a 2 hour nap to be honest, does she need it? Just tell her its not the morning and you can tell because its staring to get dark (if you are in the UK) get a simple clock and show her the time when she goes to sleep and the time when she gets up so she knows only a few hours have passed.

can you make a visual timetable for the day for her? So on a piece of paper, draw out
7am - wake up
7:30 - breakfast
9am - playtime
...
12noon - lunch
1pm - nap
3pm - wake up
...
6pm - bath
7pm - bed

(or whatever). Have her help you & colour in pictures for each activity etc. then as you go through the day, point to each item so she knows where you've got to & what happens next. She will feel more in control if she can see what the plan is for the day.

If you want to be v organised, you can have little laminated cards of different events with velcro on the back. then the child can place them on a velcro board to set out a timetable for each day. But that might be overkill if this issue resolves in a few weeks.

Like this
www.amazon.co.uk/Create-Visual-Aids-communication-transition/?tag=mumsnetforu03-21

The chart idea sounds really good! My lo loves her routine and they have something similar in nursery so it could work well.

Its one of those things that is just a phase and I wouldn't pander to too much. "Oh you silly monkey, it's not morning so you can't have another breakfast, you'll turn into a bagel/cereal/egg" etc.

I'd have classed that as a danger nap for mine once they were past 1!

Will she nap earlier?

My son napped till 4.4 and thought the same but it didn’t distress him! Although he’d always say see you tomorrow when he meant after his nap!!

Really normal. One of mine was convinced his brother went to hogwarts because he "slept at school" (ie stayed at school during the younger one's nap time!)

I used to talk about a "big night time sleep", and a "little nap". But they all figure it out in the end. I used to give mine breakfast again at 2pm, but then again, I'm totally weak in the face of toddler nonsense 🤷‍♀️

Ignore posters who will come here to nap shame you. My DS had a nap until 3 and sometimes on a weekend could sleep on an afternoon for 3 hours (1-4), go back to bed at 7 and sleep through to 5.30am. He was at nursery 4/7, 8-5.30, so poor lamb was exhausted.

Have you thought about getting very simple clock (or maybe making one!) with light/dark segmentation, so you can illustrate where in the day she is?

Or how about a special afternoon nap snack that’s definitively different to breakfast, lunch or dinner (could put it on a special very eye catching plate, or could be something that she only eats then, eg cheese and crackers)?

@2ducksandI my now 13 year old used to sleep for 3-4 hours up until being 3.5/4 years old. Just because your child doesn't/didn't do that, doesn't mean children who do are odd!!!!

I had a monster toddler so I did a photo book of our routine and all the things that made up a day structure. Did it make any difference? Who knows? She's always napped well. Barely sleeps though. She's 17!

I think the time table sounds a really good idea.

I agree about not being nap shamed. I wish my four year olds still napped. They had a two hour nap until they were nearly 3 too! DD1 on the other hand stopped napping at 15 months. Every child is different but it’s much less tiring if they are good nappers!

DS had the same thing about it being ‘morning time’ after his nap. He seems to have worked it out now without any intervention.

I can empathize with your toddler, our son is 2 as well and naps 2.30 to 4.30 easily on the weekend, often i nap as well and i can't count the number of times I've woken suddenly from a deep sleep and thought it is 4.30am when i check the time!
I would say it doesn't matter the only thing that matters is the meals, worth trying might be getting the breakfast plates out before bed time at night, and in the day time putting some toys there on the table instead. Then upon waking they can use whatever is on the table whether it be toys or breakfast?
Failing that they'll grow our of it one day!!

Nap shaming is a new low in the concept of shaming.

Awww I think that’s adorable! Lovely advice on this thread too, I like the idea of a visual timetable. You could also call it “nap-morning” or something, your toddler just thinks waking up means morning I expect, they don’t understand the concept of time at that age!

Visual routine is a great idea. I use this at work.
I would make a big deal about it being "snack time" after the nap so she associates it with something else.

Mine does this all the time, I just laugh at her. I certainly wouldn’t feel unreasonable for not giving her breakfast! To be fair I never know what year it is or who’s the prime minister when I wake up from a daytime nap. Just distract her from the upset and she’ll work it out herself soon.

She has always been a great sleeper and has always loved having naps, always asking when she can next go to bed, haha! So yes, she still needs a nap. I do tell her that "this nap time is so Mama can rest, you don't have to sleep" though, so rest assured, it's not a forced nap.

Naps are very healthy, why on earth would you question a toddler napping! It seems like quite a late nap but if it works in all other ways then there's no reason to change it.

I think visual timetable/day plan is a good idea.

@Gunpowder

I agree about not being nap shamed. I wish my four year olds still napped. They had a two hour nap until they were nearly 3 too! DD1 on the other hand stopped napping at 15 months. Every child is different but it’s much less tiring if they are good nappers!

DS had the same thing about it being ‘morning time’ after his nap. He seems to have worked it out now without any intervention.

Mine are 8 and 10 now. 10 year old was always a fab sleeper so didn't need a nap past around 18 months as he slept like a log all night. 8 year old just doesn't sleep... So we used to try and keep him awake in an afternoon so he'd sleep at night! I'd loved for him to be a napper! He still, without fail falls asleep in the car

Put her to sleep on the sofa instead of going to bed, problem solved.

Thank you for the chart idea, I've done it and she seems calmer now, can't wait to see how it affects the next nap 😊

I’m a lot older than 3 and I’d love to have an afternoon nap followed by some Weetabix and I’d still eat tea and go to bed at 10.30!

I hope it’s just a stage but I think a visual chart sounds good. I’d also probably give in and give a drink and a snack. I’d not pretend it was morning though.

Oh ffs finding something odd because you have never encountered it before is not shaming. Everytime someone questions something they aren't shaming the other person. Grow up.

@2ducksandI

You’re a charmer aintcha! Kindly... you seem a bit grumpy... do you need a nap?

Have a lovely evening

3 year old is too old for a nap