3 year old ASD assessment process- How do I write a Diary!??!

[MissManagable]

I'm going to try and keep this short but I need to ask for your wonderful help and insight into this and any advice if you've been through this process!

I have two Dds, 15 months apart, my youngest has just turned 3 and is showing (and probably had been for some time looking back on it now) of having ASD.

I started making some phone calls this week, had some wonderful advice and a long chat with a lady at the National Autistic Society who explained who I should be calling, how, what to ask for etc.

I have an appointment with a Nursery next week, also the Doctors, both of which I've discussed my Dd with and how they can support her/next steps/plans etc.

The thing I really need help with right now is that they've both asked me to write a 'Week Diary' describing her behaviours, needs, giving examples.

(Still trying to keep this short!!! Sorry!!)

I'm stumped though! And feel a bit overwhelmed....I have the day to myself today to do this (Dds are with Dad for the day), have the laptop infront of me but it just feels so unnatural to write about my daughters behaviours in a negative way, she's brilliant in so many ways I feel I should be writing those down! Writing about her lining up her toys, being frustrated, being non-verbal, flapping....I'm finding it upsetting writing just that on here!

She also laughs Alot, loves certain songs and will look to me to sing those for her, the little things that make her so amazing. Everything in me wants to write that! But I know she also has her own world and if I don't get this right it's not going to help get her properly understood to others that need to know what help she needs.

I'd be so grateful if anyone could help me with this Diary! I've written notes all week so it's fresh in my mind what we did, what she did etc, but how can I write this in a way that'll help her/help others??

Thanks for reading (that was the short version!!) I'd really appreciate any advice about this!

It might help to use an ABC chart like the one here:
<a class="break-all" href="https://www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=www.kelsi.org.uk/__data/assets/word_doc/0006/67704/ABC-Chart-with-guidance.docx&ved=2ahUKEwip__vGq7P1AhUQiFwKHUzKA_IQFnoECDQQAQ&usg=AOvVaw0AkaDJ3e8sYK0lFebFirtd" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">www.google.co.uk/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=www.kelsi.org.uk/__data/assets/word_doc/0006/67704/ABC-Chart-with-guidance.docx&ved=2ahUKEwip__vGq7P1AhUQiFwKHUzKA_IQFnoECDQQAQ&usg=AOvVaw0AkaDJ3e8sYK0lFebFirtd

That will paint a picture of your daughter's behaviours. You can absolutely put the positives on too! I wouldn't worry about the "consequence" part and I would start by writing a little each day to build into a habit.

Good luck!

Great! Thank you!

Your right about putting in the positives, because for me they are, but there's also repetition in there and behaviours that may say something to someone else in knowing the best ways to help her-

I'm still trying to get my head around things, I spent alot of last year in hope that she was coming on, trying to talk, responding to her name but it's like she stalls and stops-

Have you been through this? It's a bit daunting heading into the unknown, I know they'll be referrals (Speech & Language has been mentioned) and Nursery want me to meet with them and they're Senco to write a plan....

I'm not sure what to expect and have a huge fear she's going to be be overwhelmed by all the change -

You know your DD so well that there are things you do every day that enable her to function by deflecting trigger points in advance. Keeping a diary enables you to think about all those little things.

Think of a swan swimming. It's calm on the surface, but underneath, a lot is going on.

I'll apply this to taking DS on the bus, for example. I have to talk to him quietly to keep him calm while waiting, maybe just generally talking about where we are going, maybe reminding him not to stare at someone, maybe asking someone to get their dog to sit down as DS is scared. When the bus arrives I remind him to let the people who were there before us on first. On the bus I have trained him to find an empty double seat, but not at the back upstairs. If a baby or dog gets on, I am tense because these are triggers I can't control. If the baby starts crying, I have to calm him with a mantra and hope he doesn't start to wail in sympathy.

I don't even think about this while I'm doing it. A lot of it is stuff you would do with a small child anyway - establishing social rules, talking about what you see - but the difference is that I'm still doing it many years down the line.

I agree that you can include positives. In fact, I would try to just think of it being a description of her behaviours and not good/bad e.g.
Enjoyed playing bricks, lined them up and looked at me to name the colours
Singing time with me - sang Zoom Zoom 5 times. Laughed when I lifted her up. Didn't want to sing Row your Boat when suggested, so walked off

With ASD it is a lot about the subtle behaviours that will take time to get a picture of. They will be interested in her positives too and what you do to help e.g. Enjoyed a trip to the shop. I prepared her beforehand by discussing the route.

@BendingSpoons

I agree that you can include positives. In fact, I would try to just think of it being a description of her behaviours and not good/bad e.g. Enjoyed playing bricks, lined them up and looked at me to name the colours Singing time with me - sang Zoom Zoom 5 times. Laughed when I lifted her up. Didn't want to sing Row your Boat when suggested, so walked off

With ASD it is a lot about the subtle behaviours that will take time to get a picture of. They will be interested in her positives too and what you do to help e.g. Enjoyed a trip to the shop. I prepared her beforehand by discussing the route.

The thing is I read that and she can't do any of those things, she's non verbal, her comprehension is very limited, as is eye contact...there's lots of 'soothing' techniques I do naturally that I haven't even thought about, also routine (I also have a four year old).

This is hard....

I would just be really factual at first.

Every time you change activity, note the time.

E.g. Woke up 7am
Brushed teeth 7.10
Went downstairs 7.15
Breakfast 7.20

Then add a comment next to each. How did you know she had woken up?
Was brushing teeth easy? Did you have to do something to make it easier?
How did you decide what to have for breakfast? How do you know that she likes it? Is there something you always do to make breakfast easier? Etc etc for the whole day.

Having re-read what I wrote, it's perhaps more suitable for a DLA application.

I found it useful to keep a diary when DS was little and we were undergoing assessment. Not every day, that would be overwhelming, but every few days or if something particularly good or bad happens. Then when you are at an appointment and they ask "Does she do ...?" or "What happens when ...?" you have an example. Also it's useful to know, for example, what your soothing techniques are and when you use them, so that staff working with DD can try them too. And if you can tell them about what makes her happy and what she is good at, they have an idea of how to distract her if she is upset.

Often you spot things that might be a problem and deflect them before they happen, again without thinking about it. How do you deflect them? That's useful for anyone working with her to know.

Also make sure you go into meetings having written down what you want to say or ask, and at the end, make sure you know what is going to happen next and who is going to do what. Make a note of this in the diary.

It is horrible and upsetting having to concentrate on what your child can't do and what they struggle with. It took me months to fill in DS's DLA form because I just kept putting it away. But if you don't include the bad bits, the local authority will read the form and think she doesn't have problems when she does.

Is she 3 and Non-verbal? How come she’s had no SALT involvement until now?

I found writing the days down in actives helped.
So;
Breakfast - what he ate, how he reacted, behaviours etc

Park/soft play - as above

I was given the advice to describe my child on his worst day.

It’s not you pointing out all their faults. It’s just outlining what support they need, and how much of it.

An alternative approach would be to 1) list observations about her behaviour which match diagnostic markers for autism from eg the MCHAT (eg does not respond to own name, does not point or try to draw our attention to anything, sensory differences etc) 2) other observations which match anecdotal behaviours often associated with autism from things you have read/googled (eg no fear of strangers/recognition of familiars, sleeplessness) and 3) observations which may point the other way (eg ways in which she interacts with others, shows comprehension etc) and 4) any other observations which may or may not be relevant but which seem very specific to your daughter (eg extreme love of music, laughing for no clear reason etc). I did some googling and took this approach - and it meant my child was diagnosed on the NHS unusually early and easily.

@Stram

An alternative approach would be to 1) list observations about her behaviour which match diagnostic markers for autism from eg the MCHAT (eg does not respond to own name, does not point or try to draw our attention to anything, sensory differences etc) 2) other observations which match anecdotal behaviours often associated with autism from things you have read/googled (eg no fear of strangers/recognition of familiars, sleeplessness) and 3) observations which may point the other way (eg ways in which she interacts with others, shows comprehension etc) and 4) any other observations which may or may not be relevant but which seem very specific to your daughter (eg extreme love of music, laughing for no clear reason etc). I did some googling and took this approach - and it meant my child was diagnosed on the NHS unusually early and easily.

Thank you, that's really helpful! (You've also described my daughter in many ways in your post- the love of music and the spontaneous laughter are very much her, as are the other obvious traits).

I'll Google MCHAT, I think writing it out this way is going to be far easier and give a much clearer idea of who she is/what she needs.

@DriveInSaturday that's also really helpful, thank you! I have alot of questions. There's some things here that are being written that I wouldn't have thought of writing down, also things that I just 'do' and have always done that I haven't even thought about writing down.

I know she reacts certain ways to certain things, so often jump in to deflect, change, soothe, stop....but these will happen in nursery so I do need to be as accurate as possible in what those are, what I do, how she reacts...

I really do appreciate your helpful advice, thank you.