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Original poster

Moving house with a toddler advise

19 replies

mamatoizzywizzy · 12/01/2022 19:10

Hey !
Myself , husband and nearly 3 year old are moving house very soon - in a matter of weeks hopefully should everything go through okay!
We have a removal can hired to move us, we will be packing and they will just be moving those boxes out and in for us.

My question to you lovely Mumsnetters is- have you any words of advice for managing a toddler on the actual move day itself ? Have you been through it and it so what helped you?

I want her to be as much part of the process as she can be without overwhelming or tiring her out. I don't want to have to ship her off to a grandparents house for the night if I can help it . But I also don't want to be unfair to her , and wonder if it would just be more comfortable for her to be out of the way .

Any thoughts of experience would be gratefully received ! Thank you

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abbs1 · 12/01/2022 19:15

We moved last month with our 1yr old. Removal firm moved us. We packed boxes ready for them.
Our DS went to grandparents for the day and when we got to new house we set up his room ready for him so he had a nice place to sleep. We then picked him up in the afternoon. Worked out really well and he played all day. Made it so much less stressful.

Original poster

mamatoizzywizzy · 12/01/2022 19:17

@abbs1 thanks so much for your comment.
This is one of the options that we have considered. I was worrying that we wouldn't have enough time to set her room up before we were going to collect her again.
It's nice to hear from someone who has been through it and this arrangement worked for them ! Thank you :)

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LizzieSiddal · 12/01/2022 19:23

Having moved 4 times with Dc under 5, I’d think you’d be mad to have her there on the day!

Honestly she will either find the whole thing an adventure OR she will be upset watching her things being moved about by strangers.
Mine always went to GPs and stayed the night there. They then brought them over to the new house the next day when we’d set up their bedrooms. It was much less stressful all round!

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scaredsadandstuck · 12/01/2022 19:25

When we moved DS was the exact same age. So big enough to understand everything. I think of o remember correctly he went to pre-school/nursery and we set his and his bog brothers room up as a priority. Our removal company we're happy to rebuild furniture for us (can't remember if we paid extra for this) so we just asked them to prioritise getting boys rooms set up. I think we achieved it before they came home.

I think it would be better if she could be occupied somewhere else for at least part of the day. It's quite hectic.

adaptiveness · 12/01/2022 19:28

Get removal company to pack up everything if you can possibly afford it. It is difficult to keep a toddler safe around so many boxes and they get upset about packing things. Professionals can get it done in 3 hours, while you go out for a walk and meal. Ask them to leave a couple of rooms box free, so safe for toddler.

On the day get her out of the house, out of the way. You can bring her home for bedtime if you like.

Let her pack and unpack her own bedding, soft toy and book.

Get pizza!

Original poster

mamatoizzywizzy · 12/01/2022 19:29

@scaredsadandstuck @LizzieSiddal
Thank you for your replies .

I am definitely leaning towards her being at the grandparents for the daytime . I think my anxiety is whether to let her stop over night there as she has never done that before and I'm a bit controlling in that respect / I think I have seperation anxiety from her !! Lol

Could it be doable to move house and have her occupied for just the day time or would I be mad to think we could get her room sorted in time - and would an over night stay somewhere else be more sensible so we don't need to worry about food for her or generally caring for her on that day?

OP posts:

scaredsadandstuck · 12/01/2022 19:34

We got both boys rooms set up the same day we moved. Not 100%, but beds and a couple of familiar things. I also remember I bought them new name signs for their doors which we put up almost as soon as we got through the door! I specifically asked the removal company to prioritise their rooms.

Mattieandmummy · 12/01/2022 19:40

We moved fairly recently with an almost three year old, the removals company packed for us whilst we went out and then they unpacked and made the bedframes up for us at the new house. On the day things actually went in the lorry the GP came over for the day and occupied our LO whilst we did the last bits and then GP and toddler came with us. LO room was set up first and GP stayed with us for a few days to help unpack and occupy LO. Amazing effort from GP but we moved just over 100 miles so LO staying over with GP wasn't really an option without a lot of driving.

Topbird29 · 12/01/2022 19:42

We moved last year with ds7 and ds9. They went to stay at grandparents for 3 nights and came back to new house. Honestly so glad they did. We used movers who packed, so they came and packed the house on Thursday and moved on Friday. Kids at school Thursday, then to grandparents for tea. Meant we did not have to worry about them and their stuff at all. Friday - we were cleaning as movers moved boxes. And on Friday, there was a delay getting keys to new house due to funds processing, so had an hours extra wait in the car. Then getting in the house hysband took an hour plumbing in washing machine and I was telling movers where to put boxes. Then we had a chance to deep clean kitchen and get some bits sorted, and have takeaway whenever. We then got boys room a bit sorted for when they came to us sat afternoon. If they were with us they wouldn't have got our attention, maybe got underfoot, and seen stressed parents! As it was they left their old house as it was (and not a sad empty shell), and new house in a slightly more organised state! So glad of that. Would advise a holiday for dc to grandparents for 1 or 2 days to be honest. Especially if you are packing up yourselves (always takes longer than you think).

RampantIvy · 12/01/2022 19:43

DD had just turned 3 when we moved house. It just wasn't an issue. She always had one of us with her. TBH I don't really remember much about the day, but she wasn't under anyone's feet.

SeaToSki · 12/01/2022 19:47

Definitely have her go to GP for the day. Moving is stressful enough without trying to keep a toddler busy and not in danger. You will also need to be in four places at once. I would prioritise setting up her bed and getting some key toys in her new room and then put everything else in a next door room so her room isnt full of boxes. Then the two of you can finish her room together.
Would her GPs be able to maybe have her for the night, but if you are done in time, they bring her to the new house and you can all have a pizza picnic dinner together ? There is so much that can go wrong on moving day (not getting keys until 6pm, moving truck breaking down etc etc) Its good to have the option of a safe space for her to sleep if needed.

mummatomason · 12/01/2022 20:00

I recently moved with a 3 year old and he stayed with us and helped. We did everything ourselves and he loved helping. He made the boxes up and helped put stuff in. He even helped carry things to and from the van. He came with me to pick the keys up and i let him unlock the door and go in first. He absolutely loved being a part of it, picking out where everything went.

Dont get me wrong it took a little bit more time than if he was at GP but i think he wouldve been so upset that wed sent him away. I loved watching him be so excited.

I just kept telling him what was happening and all his toys where coming so there was no upset on the day.

nearlychristmas21 · 12/01/2022 20:01

Yup we had ours at my parents and then collected them after they'd had tea. They got to run around and check out all the rooms before they went to sleep.

1AngelicFruitCake · 12/01/2022 20:04

In my own experience (moved with a 3 year old and 1 year old - not sure you say how old your child is?) I would let them have a settled day and night at grandparents. Don’t know why you want them to be part of it? They might get upset, it is stressful!

I would recommend you getting your child used to staying overnight at grandparents! When pregnant with my youngest child I was suddenly quite ill and my eldest had to go to grandparents overnight and I’m so glad they had tried it before!

abbs1 · 12/01/2022 20:07

[quote mamatoizzywizzy]@abbs1 thanks so much for your comment.
This is one of the options that we have considered. I was worrying that we wouldn't have enough time to set her room up before we were going to collect her again.
It's nice to hear from someone who has been through it and this arrangement worked for them ! Thank you :)[/quote]
Our removal company turned up at 8am but 1030am they were done. They had unloaded everything by 1pm at the new house. Once DS room was done we tidied round, got stair gates up ans got in some pizzas for tea and a kids microwave meal for DS and picked him up around 5pm. We'd never left DS overnight before and didnt want him to be away from us any longer.

user1958493 · 12/01/2022 20:10

@abbs1

We moved last month with our 1yr old. Removal firm moved us. We packed boxes ready for them. Our DS went to grandparents for the day and when we got to new house we set up his room ready for him so he had a nice place to sleep. We then picked him up in the afternoon. Worked out really well and he played all day. Made it so much less stressful.

I moved In December and done exactly the same thing. Worked really well

millymae · 12/01/2022 20:18

My sister moved house on a day her almost 3 year old was at nursery. and there were no issues at all.
By the time she picked him up at 5 pm more less everything as sorted including the playhouse in the garden.

pollyparrot45 · 12/01/2022 21:12

We moved with our 1 year old earlier in the year. We dropped him off at grandparents for the day. Collected him once the boxes were in and beds were set up and made etc and we had the basics unpacked.

This was 100% the right decision. It was stressful, mucky and there was a lot of waiting around. He would have been miserable. He was still included in 'arriving at our new house'. We had dinner (takeaway) and we showed him his things had arrived and he helped unpack some toys etc.

Took a couple of weeks to unpack so he was part of making it home.

I don't think your 3 year old is going to enjoy the reality of moving tbh so I'd probably let them have a relaxed day elsewhere and introduce her to your new home when you have time to invest in enjoying it together

pollyparrot45 · 12/01/2022 21:13

This was all done in the day time. Got him home around 17:30-18:00 ish ready for dinner and bed.

I was (am) breastfeeding so wouldn't leave him overnight.

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