Children's party gift etiquette

[JennetHumfrye]

My son is in reception has been invited to a classmates birthday party. I have RSVP'd to the party but am now wondering what the etiquette is for getting a gift. I don't know the little boy or his family so don't know what he is into. Would it be strange to text his mum and ask him what to get? Or should I just put some money in a cute birthday card.

I know I sound like I'm making this more complicated than it needs to be, but I just want to check what other people usually do.

Thanks all. I agree, texting the mum may just irritate her, especially if she ends up getting 20 odd texts all asking the same thing.

I will take DS to the shops and let him pick something out. I know I sound daft for asking!

We always went for a sticker / activity book (most kids like them and even if they have that particular one already, they can't do it twice so could still use the gifted one).

Or Lego. Again, even if they have the same set, the pieces can be added to a larger collection and used to make different sets.

I think money in a card and some sweets is great - DS class started doing this probably in year 2 & it was so much better. He would save it up and buy a bigger item like a trampoline or a scooter. Then he would get much more use out of it than lots of small gifts.

I don't think money for a child that young is really appropriate, personally. Plus, I'd want a gift to go to the child and not risk money going in the parent's back pocket. I don't think a text is a problem, if you want to be sure, but generic stuff is absolutely fine. Books, games, craft stuff etc.

I have a stash of £5-7 toys/books/games from Aldi/Asda/Argos (shops beginning with other letters available). Argos often do 2 for £10 or something like that! I have a mix of boys & girls stuff (in this scenario, I go gendered). I also have a stash of cheapo cards! My DD has had 8 class birthday parties since starting in September 😱

My DD would hate getting money, she’d rather a cheap present any day of the week!

I buy a kids magazine - cebeebies or similar - usually comes with a free toy which is a bonus - and then maybe a box of 3 kinder eggs or one of those cake baking kits - you know the type - just add an egg or whatever, and it has the cake cases and some decorations included? Brought themed ones like frozen or paw patrol when younger but for older kids buy a better Crocker style cupcake/brownie one.
Usually comes in at about £7-8
Also the works do lovely book deals where you choose so many for £5 or £10 x
Hair clips/bobbles/scrunches/Alice bands go down well for girl gifts too

I also wouldn't ask mom and would probably think of DIY kits or books and a nice card. Might be also a one or a birthday photo collage if your child isn't fond of crafts.