8M old weaning…portions, texture…hell!!

[ShleepyMumma]

Hello!
I have an 8M old who is on 3 meals a day. She is ok/average with finger foods, depends what it is. With spoon feeding, she is on a slightly lumpier texture, more than complete purée but the food is never not put in the blender (hope that makes sense). So it’s blitzed but with bits/lumps I guess. I’m really struggling to know how much to give her. I know they say go with babies lead but this is where I’m having problems. She will take say 8 baby spoons of blitzed chicken casserole and then refuse any more. Fine I think, she’s done. But my husband doesn’t think she’s had enough food so will then try some Greek yoghurt. She opens her mouth and will take lots of yoghurt. We decide how much to give her but if we didn’t, it feels like she would just keep going! But she’s absolutely done with the main meal, chicken casserole, spag bol etc.
I am right to offer the yoghurt? Is she refusing the dinner due to taste (she will happily take 6-10 spoons first)? Is it the texture of the main meal? And yoghurt is super easy so she just takes it?
Finger food wise she will eat some veg sticks like sweet pot, carrot but barely touches broccoli, green beans etc.
Just feel she’s a bit…crap with it all 🤣 And I’m not sure if I should be blending it more and slowly increasing texture. Is it flavour and I just need to keep offering?!
It’s just all consuming sometimes trying to get it right.
Thanks for any advice/tips!

If she's ok with finger foods just ditch the purée. So much easier

And yes offer the yogurt but I'd leave her to self serve at this stage. Is it just plain yogurt?

Thanks for the reply! I would worry she would barely have enough with finger foods. Toast soldiers she can do but I can’t give toast 3 times a day. Veg sticks I just don’t think she’d eat anything.
Yes plain full fat Greek yoghurt, sometimes we add some purée fruit from a pouch, but only a little bit and not always. Don’t want her getting too into the sweet stuff.
So should I put the bowl on her highchair and let her do the spoon for main meal? See what she takes?

You can give all meals as finger food - the chicken casserole, spaghetti bolognese, fish, potatoes and green beans or even fish dingers chips and beans if you so wish. Don't worry about how much she's actually ingesting at this stage, her milk is still her main nutrition. Let her have fun and explore the textures (and mess)

Tried this this evening! She put stuff to her mouth but most left on highchair or floor. A lot of is also falls out her mouth. Feels like she failing massively at it 😒

Leave her to self serve as finger foods, but also I’d be offering everything together, main and pudding.

She can then choose what to eat, but doesn’t learn that if she waits long enough, she can get something “nice” after her savoury meal.

She's only 8 months old. She's doing fine.

I'd ditch the purées and spoon feeding personally... a lot of faff for no real benefit. Just pop food in front of her and she'll make a mess while she figures it out (meat/veg etc in sticks or cubes for ease, but no need to limit to finger foods) but will eat as much as she wants/needs. Most nutrition still comes from milk at this stage so let her know explore food a bit.

I’d just keep at it with the self-serving and finger foods, and putting out her main and pudding all at once rather than in courses.

She might take a few months to work it out, that’s very normal, it really won’t do her any harm not to take much proper food at this age. Milk is her main source of food, and she’ll pick up the rest with time.

Worrying about it won’t help anyone; the main thing is to let her enjoy exploring new things and pick it up in her own time.

She's not failing and neither are you. In fact I would say the absolute opposite. She is trying and eating plenty. It's hard but you need to change your mindset and same for husband and understand that this is a really long process. She is 8 months old and right at the start and is learning to eat. Her stomach is still tiny so her appetite will be small. Keep putting different things in front of her with different textures - a mix of finger food and lumpy puree is fine. And don't worry about how much she actually consumes - she should still be getting most of her calories from milk before 1. She's not going to start eating adult sized portions in 6 months. Weaning is about getting them used to processing food and literally to learn how to eat/feed themselves. It's a long process. There will be waste. Don't assume if she rejected broccoli that means she doesn't like it. Don't limit her diet, keep trying her on things she's previously disliked. Greek yogurt is fine and no need to sweeten it. It works well for breakfast too so don't feel you need to give it as pudding.

She's only 8 months. She's not 'failing' at anything!

Weaning is a gradual process for most babies. Mine is 1 year old and is just really starting to enjoy finger foods in last few weeks. I still spoon feed him main meal at tea time, porridge at breakfast and sometimes his lunch depending what it is. But he gets offered a lot of finger food.

I wanted him to eat without stress or pressure and knew it would all come eventually so just offered a variety and he progressed naturally. He'll move onto spoon feeding himself when he is ready, as long as he is eating and enjoying food that's all I care about!

I never spoon fed either of mine. They were both small babies from birth. My first barely ate anything till 10 months then ate loads. She's 6 now and a normal height and healthy weight. My second is 8 months now and has put lots in her mouth since 6 months but still spits quite a lot out. It's mostly about learning about food and mealtimes at this age. They could both spoonfeed themselves yoghurt from 6/7 months if we scooped it from the bowl and handed them the loaded spoon. My baby goes mad for plain greek yoghurt too so we limit how often we serve it.

She's not failing that's exactly what's supposed to happen at this stage. No matter what other mums are no doubt saying about their own babies wolfing down bowl fulls. She's got 4 months before you even need to think about her getting her main nutrition from food. That's half her life so far, think about what she's learned in that time. Let her have fun just now. Give her a couple of spoon fulls along side if you feel better doing so. Mush what you give her down with a fork and add a drop of milk for your spoons. I'd probably give whole fruit with the yogurt rather than purée but mainly just relax and have fun with it rather then worry about what's actually going down as that doesn't matter a jot just now. Think of it as sensory play.

She's only 8 months. She is normal and doing fine.

Most finger food will really just get played with for a while. That's ok. It's normal.

Look at your own plate - anything that can be picked up is finger food. Give her that.

Neat, veg, fruit, bread, pasta, whatever.

She will get there. They all do.

At this age most of their nutrition comes from milk.

I would just put her food in front of her and get on with eating your own food.

Thank you, everyone. Consensus is to move forward with just finger food and not worry about consumption. I’m going to try really hard to not worry and just see what she does. If nothing is going in and she doesn’t really do anything with the finger foods, do I just keep trying? Or do I then try some mash/mush etc

My dd was awkward when she was weaning. She wouldn’t eat any purées that had lumps in it. Would physically gag. But if you let her have finger foods, she would manage no problem

I used to let her have finger meals and eat as much as she wanted to, and then give her a smooth purée or yoghurt as a pudding. Worked really well for us and she’s not at all fussy now. (She’s 8)

At her age her nutritional needs are being met by her milk intake for her, she is learning that foods taste nice so I would continue to put food in front of her and allowing her to get on with it. Neither she, nor you, are failing at anything.

Yes keep trying. Mine wouldn't really do finger food until recently despite it being consistently offered from 6 months (he is now 1) He is getting a wide range of flavours and textures both from meals I feed him and from finger foods. I also eat with him at mealtimes and he didn't try and grab my food until recently- they all develop at their own pace and you know your baby and can judge how best to help her.

I know it's hard but try not to worry too much as she will get there with encouragement and variety on offer. And it doesn't matter if she doesn't take to some things, I remember plenty I didn't like when I was little and growing up but I'm fine with now. Mine doesn't like egg unless I make a cheesy crepe but I'm not bothered if he won't do soldiers dipped in an egg or strips of omelette. I offer them as part of his diet but even as an adult I wouldn't choose to eat it so its OK if he doesn't like everything he is supposed to.

And there's nothing wrong with spoon feeding alongside finger foods. It gets nutrition and flavour into meals and cuts down on food waste!

@ShleepyMumma

Thank you, everyone. Consensus is to move forward with just finger food and not worry about consumption. I’m going to try really hard to not worry and just see what she does. If nothing is going in and she doesn’t really do anything with the finger foods, do I just keep trying? Or do I then try some mash/mush etc

Yes just keep offering a variety of foods and lots of praise and encouragement, it doesn't really matter how much is actually eaten for now.

Sounds like you’re doing great. Your little one spitting food out is all part of the process. Gag reflex and learning how to deal with textures.

My little one didn’t take to broccoli, but the other day I added unsalted butter and lemon to it, and he devoured it haha

Honestly I'd just stick with finger food. I use the solid starts app for guidance on cutting food up safely. I give my baby a bit of whatever we're having and when she was 8mo she might have sometimes just played with it, maybe thrown it, maybe just tasted it - it's all totally normal, little one will be getting what they need from breast milk/formula so this is just about learning to eat.

My daughter is 11 month's now and I'm amazed at how she's come on leaps and bounds with eating. She really enjoys food now, even so some meals she eats barely anything. They will get there with it and finger foods are so much easier for you.

Check out that solid starts app though it so useful just to search a food and it gives you an idea on the best way to cut it/serve it for their age.

I do a bit of both - I give my baby a pre loaded spoon to let him feed himself and give finger food also. He’s 9.5 months and still not too interested in the finger food but I’m still offering. He was born 7 weeks early so I’m thinking that may be why, I’m hoping he’ll get more interested soon, letting him fed himself will be far easier for me. I put a bin bag all around him on the floor so that when he throws the food off I can just brush it into the bin 😅

Their main source of nutrition until 1 is milk, she's not failing at it, that's a bit harsh and putting so much pressure on both of you! Sounds like she'd do fine with finger foods and you spooning anything like yoghurt or soup that would need to be spooned for now, until she can do it.

I’m going to try really hard to relax about it and offer finger food only. Did this at lunch and barely anything went down, panic and I think I should give some sort of mush even if she takes a few spoonfuls. Not sure where this mind set has come from….not enjoyable

@ShleepyMumma

I’m going to try really hard to relax about it and offer finger food only. Did this at lunch and barely anything went down, panic and I think I should give some sort of mush even if she takes a few spoonfuls. Not sure where this mind set has come from….not enjoyable

Have you tried giving your baby milk 30-60 minutes before solids? Then you know they have had the calories they need and anything else they have is just learning.