Talk to me about reins!

[DisneyGirl2387]

My 13 month old is happily walking now and we bought him his first pair of shoes today so he can finally potter around outside. Do I need reins? Or can I get by without? Any advice? First time Mum here so pretty clueless!

Some people hate them but I have found them useful for some of mine. They are great for going on small walks when little one is still finding their feet and trip alot, you can stop them from hitting the ground so often.

Never used them

If you're in a large park and reckon you can outrun him fine
If him slipping your grip for a second could put him in the way of a car, get the reins.

The reality is their hands are tiny and hard to keep hold of sometimes. So if you're pottering around your little enclosed park that's fine, but small kids pottering down a pavement are at risk of their impulsivity and lack of road sense

I had to use them until my son was over 4! Walked a lot as no car and DS was hyper. But I agree with previous poster at 13 months most people would use them especially to prevent falls. I think reins can help you be more chilled when my son let go of my hand near the road I just grabbed the reins.

Found them very useful. Toddler has hands free. Holding hands can be uncomfortable over longer distances with height differences and reins alleviates this. Easier to hold than a slippery toddler hand.

We used then at that age, as pp when walking near roads etc.
Let him free in the parks etc.

I also found he wanted the independence of not holding my hand so they gave him the space to do as he wished but I still had the safety aspect.

Seeing as I can't run the length of myself, Reins were invaluable when my two were little.
Either traffic or fast flowing rivers to consider.

I had a bolter so reins were essential (until nursery managed to train him to hold hands). He had a little backpack with reins attached which worked very well.

I never used them (4 kids)

I used them for my youngest DC. She liked running to the road so I found them helpful when we were walking next to busy roads.

Use them and they are great if they fall as I’ve caught mine several times and saved him

I use them all the time with my 2.4 year old. The little backpack ones are handy they can carry their own snacks 😂

Ds1 would not hold hands,so got backpack reins for him. He was fine with them and loved the backpack to put his things in long after we didn't need reins. Ds2 would not do anything to be contained, so reins, baby gate between rooms, play pen etc were all out. Car journeys were as minimal as possible and he screamed the whole time. So in conclusion, useful if your child agrees.

I have a bolter who refuses to use the push chair and will only walk. I didn't hesitate to use reins (although only from about 20 months as she was fine until then and sat nicely in the trolley and push chair 😂). When the alternative is getting injured / running in front of people / dashing off then it makes sense - but every child is different and not every child refuses a push chair / dashes off / wriggles out of vice like hand grips near roads.

Do what works for you! (Surprisingly, DD loves her reins backpack and puts it in herself and brings me the 'lead'!)

Oh and the backpack is great if an epic tantrum occurs and she wants to lie on the hard floor on her back. It cushions her and prevents injury!

DS refused to hold hands and would bolt (turned out to have SN, but we didn’t know it then) so we used them until he was 3.5. His sister was the compliant sort of child who would trot along at my side holding my finger, so she didn’t need them.

Some people are very disapproving (comparisons with dogs on leads etc) but if you feel like using them would make your life easier OP, then don’t let anyone put you off.

I find them quite useful, the style with a backpack attached, even though DS holds hands well it makes me feel safer near a road or near water. The small backpack is also useful to carry a pack of hand wipes etc if we’re just heading to the park.

I used them for DS1 when he was at the stage of being able to slip my hand and run into traffic. It was especially reassuring on the platform at the train station. At some point it became clear that he could be trusted (within reason) to hold hands and we didn't use them any more. DS2 has started walking but isn't pulling away yet and can't walk fast, so he's not using reins yet.

At first we had one of those cute little backpacks with a kind of lead on it. But as soon as you or he pulled on it, he'd fall flat on his face. The traditional sort with a harness all round was much better.

I know in theory that some people don't approve of reins but I only ever heard people say what a good idea they were. And so what if people had criticised? He didn't fall under a train and that's the main thing.

It depends on the child. Used them all the time with DS but not at all with my DDs.

I hope @MrsPresley doesn't mind me sharing her post. She used to post on threads like this, and I think of her everytime someone mentions reins.

My DS was hit by a car and died because his dad didn't put his reins on him (or his twin sister), he was in a hurry and thought for a short journey it wouldn't matter.

Well we all found out, in the worst way possible that it does matter, it only takes a minute to put them on, and it took less than a minute for my DS to end up under a car, while ExDH was distracted by DD.

Please please always use reins, no matter how short your journey, if you are near a road then put them on.

Believe me when I say you really don't want the life I have had for the past 28 years, I wouldn't wish that on anyone!

Even though I had another 3 children, there is a huge emptiness that will never be filled.

And thank you to the posters who have remembered me, hopefully on the next "reins" thread there will be some more parents who will remember me and please keep telling people how important reins can be

Oh and if anyone says it's like putting them on a lead like a dog, well, would you let your dog run about the streets without a lead

I loved reins for my DC, gives the freedom to walk by themselves without the worry. I know they seem to be unfashionable; I had to buy some detestably ugly things with a grimacing teddy bear on them 16 years ago but they remain genuinely one of the things I would recommend most to oarebts of toddlers

I used proper reins (not the the backpack type) for my first daughter and using them now with my second. Little children don't always want to hold hands (my LO likes to carry stones) and sometimes you need both hands for a minute. I also think it must be uncomfortable for them to walk with their arm stretched up all of the time. They are great for keeping them safe and stopping them hitting the ground when they stumble. My eldest actually told her dad off for not putting them on her once 😄 (she preferred hand holding to start though) We stopped holding the strap 100% of the time when she was a bit bigger but the harness was easier to grab hold of if needed e.g near a road.

I had a 20 month gap. Reins with a loop for my wrist meant I had hands free for the pram. She also held onto the pram.

They are one of the things you don't need until that one day you do when they try to bolt across a road or similar.

Depends on the dc - Dd1 was always by my side and happy to hold my hand. Very obedient dc. Then I had 2 lively twins and needed reins or they’d dart into the road plus I could strap one dc in their car seat with the reins of the other looped round my wrist. We used the backpack ones so they carried their own snacks too I could tuck the reins away and only get them out when needed. I used to put them round my wrists and still hold their hands at roads etc. They were a safety backup.

I loved mine! We had little character ones that were hidden as a backpack. I let DS pick them so he wanted to wear it. We used it for busy places like shopping centres or walking along the road