Preparing toddler for c section and new sibling

[Jsgdud]

My toddler will be 2.5 when DC2 is born. I'm planning a c section and mainly worried about how she will cope with this on top of a sibling. She speaks well and has a good understanding of things generally.

Things she does which I'll be unable to do:
Likes to be picked up for cuddles, in the mornings likes to come in and lie on (top of!) me for a cuddle in bed, only accepts me putting her to bed which involves lifting into cot and if she wakes in the night only accepts me going in to lift her out for a cuddle. Do I gradually stop doing these now in preparation or wait until baby is here and explain to her/show her my bandage etc so she understands more why I can't. Any tips please!

Hi @Jsgdud, firstly big congratulations! :)

I haven't been through this myself but will do in the future (hopefully if/when I conceive!), but I would plan to start dropping the pick ups etc with DD and phase your partner (if you have one) in more to help, then it doesn't feel as much like it's her sibling that's caused mummy to stop doing those things with her.

It's really normal to worry about these things though. A friend of mine felt exactly the same with having her c section but said her 2 1/2 year old just knew something wasn't right and was really sensible and caring to her.

Good luck with it all!

Try not to overthink it. Things to do to prepare:

• Move her into bed rather than a cot so you don't have to lift, and can lie next to her for a story.
• Get her used to someone else picking her up, even if only a couple of times
• Get her a step, if you haven't already, so she can climb up to reach the sink, or get in the bath. Teach her to do it so it's normal by the time the baby comes.

I had two CS's (3 DC in total), and it was really not an issue. Ask for help. Any who comes round can empty the dishwasher, peg the washing out etc. You mustn't lift anything heavier than your baby for those six weeks though or you risk making your recovery much harder.

Good luck!

I used to just mention what was going to happen to me when we'd talk about the baby or when we'd read our new baby book together so I'd say something like "mummy has to have an operation to get the baby out of my tummy, I'll be feeling a bit sore for a few weeks after so we'll just have to have cuddles on the sofa instead of me picking you up. Daddy can still pick you up though". DD was about the same age and understood I wasn't well and needed to take it easy. We'd also talk about how babies don't really do much to make sure she didn't think she was getting a ready made play mate.

I found that naturally as I became bigger with my pregnancy that I couldn’t pick DD up very easily which helped get her used to it and I’d moved her out of a cot by the time DS was born.
When DS was born I told her that I had a poorly tummy to encourage her to be careful and then if she was running round etc I’d just be a bit on gaurd

I just said "mummy's got an ouchie" and pointed at my tummy whenever I couldn't do anything (actually not that much). But mine was under 2 and telling her about the future was a bit tricky as she didn't have much sense of time

when your toddler sees you first after the CS then make sure you have a large pillow over your tummy. I forgot and she kneed me in my wound in our enthusiasm for a cuddle...