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Is being a parent awful?

35 replies

PJames84 · 14/12/2021 20:28

I’m posting this subject as it was the search I typed into google just before my daughter was born. I was petrified, and deeply worried that my life would awful with a child but knowing that I had to have a child otherwise I’d regret it. I’m writing this for anyone else searching for this topic to tell you that I haven’t regretted a single moment. It hasn’t been easy at times but I have loved every minute. It really has been a joy! I absolutely loved my sleep before and was particularly worried about this. It hasn’t been an issue at all. I think your body just knows you have to get up and helps you. You’re still tired but you can safely look after your baby. I have been lucky that my baby hasn’t had issues like colic, reflux, all the things that everyone warns you about but are actually pretty rare. I am lucky to have a supportive partner who can do all the things I can when needed. I am in absolute awe of single parents, you are warriors, because just sometimes you need someone to take the baby so you can just chill for a bit. My baby is 4 months now and I know there is so so much to come but for now, things are good, and I think it’s essential to enjoy the times when all is well. :-)

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
buckingmad · 15/12/2021 10:20

@sjxoxo

Omg *@PJames84* Thankyou for writing this! I am 35 weeks and shitting myself that my life is gone.. not to mention despite all the courses and info given I’m still feeling really frightened about giving birth. Baby boy is predicted 4.5-5kgs at due date so possible induction on the cards too. I’m in France & there’s also no gas & air.. only epidural. So I’m nervous on all fronts. Im desperate to meet baby boy and give him a cuddle but currently in my head the birth experience seems like a really high price to pay… did you feel similar? If yes how did you accept the inevitable of getting a small person out of your body 🤪 xo
I wouldn’t worry too much about no gas and air. It didn’t even touch the sides with my contraction pains (back to back labour and her head got pushed to the side of my cervix so she got stuck). The only thing I found helped with gas and air is it regulated my breathing and got me to breathe deep through my contractions. Otherwise I just tensed and held my breath. Epidural saved my sanity.
PatchworkElmer · 15/12/2021 10:37

Absolutely head over heels in love with my 5 year old. He is the light of my life and I am a better person for being his Mummy.

sjxoxo · 15/12/2021 11:18

@buckingmad Thankyou for your reply. I am planning on an epidural but nervous about that aswell, either it not working or just the procedure.. it’s so hard with your first because I feel I have nothing to compare the experience to at all- so you’re sort of going in blind and all you’ve heard is horrible things!! Xo

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UniformSchmooniform · 15/12/2021 11:25

My 12 year ago old son surprised me with a birthday present he'd bought for me with his own money this week. My heart swelled with love and pride and I bloody love those parenting moments! No regrets with my two boys. None.

Thinkbiglittleone · 15/12/2021 11:26

I was the least maternal person before our DS, but it is a true joy. It can be frustrating and need the patience of a saint, but he is such a good boy, polite, kind,caring and so funny now at 4 years old.

It truly makes me sad to think I may have missed out on this life, if I wouldn't have changed my mind, this might not be my life now and that thought, devastates me.

I agree with a PP, being my sons mummy makes me a better person and makes me want to be a better person.

UniformSchmooniform · 15/12/2021 11:27

And just to add labour was fine both times, it was mind-blowing in a good way. Not everyone has a horror story x

Cam2020 · 15/12/2021 11:28

This is a lovely thread! I worried so much before my daughter was born and it was all needless (although natural). Even on the toughest days (which are, thankfully, rare), I've never regretted it. Definitely the best thing I've ever done and I've surprised myself at how I have changed for the better, or at least reassessed my life and values.

Comedycook · 15/12/2021 11:30

I loved having babies! I have a teenager now and can confirm it's absolutely awful!

buckingmad · 15/12/2021 11:58

[quote sjxoxo]@buckingmad Thankyou for your reply. I am planning on an epidural but nervous about that aswell, either it not working or just the procedure.. it’s so hard with your first because I feel I have nothing to compare the experience to at all- so you’re sort of going in blind and all you’ve heard is horrible things!! Xo[/quote]
I was adamant I didn’t want an epidural as I was really nervous. But my contractions were so awful and lasted so long with barely a break in between that I welcomed the epidural! The hardest part for me was keeping still whilst contracting but you just go into superwoman mode and get through it.

Baby is only 4/5 months so not thought too much about it yet but I think I will ask for an epidural from the get go next time.

ALittleOldLadyTookInHerGoat · 15/12/2021 12:21

@Comedycook

I loved having babies! I have a teenager now and can confirm it's absolutely awful!
I came to say this. Baby years average with my first. Hell with my second.

First now in teen years which are like climbing a mountain in a blizzard everyday. Whilst having snow balls pelted at you. 😁

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