Leaving 11 and 8 year old at home

[LittleDonkeyKong]

I've been offered a job. Working hours are Wednesday to Friday 10am-6pm. I'm in 2 minds about what to do. My girls are sensible and know not to leave the house, answer the door or mess with appliances. I have left them home before when nipping to the shops. My eldest has a mobile with facetime etc, 2 neighbours (one next door) have said the girls can go to them if they need anything. My workplace will be literally a 3 minute drive from home. I know there is no law about ages left at home etc but obviously they are my responsibility and if anything was to happen it would be on my head so to speak. I will be contacting childminders and nurseries tomorrow to enquire about after school care but neither of my girls are impressed as they say 'they aren't babies'

I'd say no way. It's too much responsibility for the 11 year old to be sole charge of the 8 year old for a few hours, 3x a week.

I would consider allowing the 11 year old to come home alone if they're responsible. But be aware that they might not like this. My (yr 7) 12 year old lets herself in once a week and is home alone from 3:45-5:30 ish. She isn't particularly happy about it now that the novelty has worn off since September, especially now it's dark when she's home alone.

How would they handle an emergency? It’s a no from me (I have children the same ages)

@ffscovid

I'd say no way. It's too much responsibility for the 11 year old to be sole charge of the 8 year old for a few hours, 3x a week.

I would consider allowing the 11 year old to come home alone if they're responsible. But be aware that they might not like this. My (yr 7) 12 year old lets herself in once a week and is home alone from 3:45-5:30 ish. She isn't particularly happy about it now that the novelty has worn off since September, especially now it's dark when she's home alone.

Oh I just mean as a one off to pop to the shop for 20 mins to half an hour at most. I could never leave them several times a week for a few hours. Probably be 14 and 18 by the time I’m ok with that 😂

@Nedclarity

How would they handle an emergency? It’s a no from me (I have children the same ages)

Very true, I suppose that’s why it’s never occurred to me to even consider it, but then I read other peoples comments and I think maybe I’m being OTT.

@ffscovid

I’m replying to the wrong thread 😂 totally ignore me! I need to go back to bed 🥴🥴🥴😂

Definitely not. I have a 11/13 year old. I leave the 13 year old at home alone occasionally for a couple of hours max. I wouldn't leave him from 10-6...it's a long time. I never leave my 11year old home alone but that's because she is quite young for her age. Your 8 year old is far too young to be home alone...let alone for 8 hours.

Absolutely not.

Is the 11yo at secondary school? If so, then possibly allow them if they were happy with it, but even so there would need to be rules - what about friends coming round? Going onto town after school, hot food/drink etc?

8yo - no way. It's too much for the 11 yo to look after them every night. Not fair on them.

Wow OP I can't believe all the No's! I did something similar when my two were this age. I used my lunch break to go pick the kids up from school and then set them up with TV and snacks. The eldest had a phone and would call me once or twice an hour till home time for a chat.
You know your own children, would the 8 year old be ok with this?
I was babysitting on my own at 10 years, that's many moons ago but children haven't just changed that much.

Mine are 15, 12 and 8. The eldest I'll leave at home and the 12 year old I'll leave for a couple of hours or so but my 8 year old, much to his disappointment, if I leave the house he has to come with me.

I would arrange childcare for the 8 year old and let the 11 year old try staying home alone.

It'd be a no from me. Left eldest from 13 when she had her own key, not the younger ones though. She's almost 16 now and I wouldn't leave her in charge of younger ones yet either.

My brother's 8 year old used to walk home from school alone, let himself in and fix a snack and play until his older brother got home, then later my DB. Both kids were very happy.

My dd has been walking to and from school since age 10. Now age 11 she has a key. I would not have done it age 8 but her route home is over a mile and a few roads to cross.

If you don't want them having a key you could install a keypad access.

yes to leaving the 11yo
no to leaving the 8yo

IMVHO it's not reasonable to expect the 11yo to take responsibility for the younger one, so I'd make the decision as if the younger one were alone. But I might start leaving the 8yo for much shorter spells now and again, with a view to leaving them for longer aged 10 if sensible.

No way!! 11 is much too young to be in charge! I occasionally leave my nearly 11 year old while I pop to shop (am there and back in less than 15 mins) and I’m anxious the entire time, and she’s extremely sensible and we have fantastic neighbours who she knows very well to either ring for help or go to.

Nope for either.

I had this exact gap in age. Both DC were in childcare until they left primary, DS went to after school club and DD preferred to go to a childminder. DS went home alone from school from the time he went to secondary, DD stayed at her childminders until she left primary, I dropped her off at the childminders in the morning and picked her up from the childminders on my way home. No way would I have left the 2 of them together at home for 2 1/2 hours every week day evening. I don’t think it’s fair on them at all. And what might happen?

I’m a bit at people not leaving a 13 year old!

Mine went to afterschool club in primary school.
They are now 14 - 15 in a couple of weeks (year 10), 13 (year 9) and 11 (year 6).
11 year old goes to afterschool club twice a week and one of us finishes early on the other days.
Other 2 walk home and let them selves in if we aren’t home. In holidays all 3 stay home. I only work 2 streets away so close by if needed in an emergency.

l left mine when l had to work sometimes, two sons aged only just 8 and 12, they were absolutely fine and now 16 and 20, my husband died young and l had no support, they had to grow up fast. They have always got on very well and both very responsible, never had any problems.

I thought 14 was the legal age you could be left alone ?

@Fredstheteds

I thought 14 was the legal age you could be left alone ?

No age- according to google