Loneliness/boredom

[Morgan12345]

I know I'm so lucky to have my son but I feel so lonely and bored the majority of days.

He's 3 months old now and I'm not going back to work until March. I feel like we do the same thing day in day out and it's making me feel completely rubbish. I find it's affecting my relationship with my partner because every single minute he can be home I want him to be with me so I have some time to speak to an actual adult but he obviously would like to do his own thing too like go out with his friends.

Me and my son go out on walks (when the weather allows it, we're in Scotland so good weather isn't a regular occurrence!), we play on his play mat, I read to him, we 'speak' to each other. I just don't know what else to do with him and it's getting me so down. I don't even have friends that have kids or partners so they're all off doing their own thing and don't really understand what I'm going though.

I also find myself crying on pretty much a daily basis. I've thought it could be postnatal depression but unsure?

Any ideas on what to do with him on a daily basis and how to make it less boring?

Do you have family you can talk to? What you like to talk about?

It IS lonely and boring. It WILL get better as they get older

If you feel you need help, get it..

If you feel you're a shitty person, get over it your not. We have mostly all felt this misery. You may now get some people on thread claiming they loved looking at a babys face for hours weeks years minutes at a time.

IT IS BORING. IT WILL PASS

Get your partner more involved if possible. If needs be, dump baby on your partner when he gets home and fuck off out for a bit.

This bit is hard. Babies are hard. Children/toddlers are easier

Yes sorry there's no avoiding the fact that at 3 months old they are quite boring and activities monotonous.
My DD is now 6 months and much more interesting/fun to interact with, unfortunately you are going back to work when you might enjoy it more. It is obviously still a bit samey and not like having another adult to connect with but from 5 months the new skills really start coming in thick and fast and it is lovely to see what is new.
Can you go to any local baby groups? Story time at the library to meet other mums? Or perhaps your partner could spend some time with baby so you can go and see your friends?

The crying I would bring up with someone. How are you feeling when crying? Do you feel it is 'reasonable' crying or does it feel like the crying is uncontrollable?

I cried a lot for the first few months with all of them but it was weird bastard hormonal shit that dissipated as soon as I opened up to a midwife about it. Except with baby no1, I needed help to deal with that crying.

Can you find some other mums/parents of young babies in your area? You really need it with a baby that age. Are there any parent and baby groups you could get to? Or there is the app for linking up with other parents, can't remember what it's called. I would also really recommend just going out and doing whatever you fancy doing while your baby is still young enough - you don't need to tailor activities to them at that age, they can be taken along anywhere. Good luck

It is boring and lonely at times, you're not alone in feeling like this.

I would suggest getting yourself booked in to some baby classes, or look into what free mum and baby sessions go on in your area or nearby (churches often run them). Then persist with going and actively get to know other mums so you've then got people to pass the time with! A walk and a coffee with a fellow mum can turn a crap day into a good one.

Ditto comment re just going out and doing what you want to do - the baby won't mind and will benefit from going to all sorts of different environments. I plan my week ahead and try to make sure I have something on every day, even if it's just going into town and going to a coffee shop on my own as a last resort. Our cinema does parent and baby showings of films which can be fun to go to sometimes.

Hope this is helpful and hope you manage to get some improvement. Definitely speak with your GP re your mood as well x

Tiny babies are dull. I remember feeling exactly the same way as you. One thing that helped me was getting out every day, regardless of weather. I remember once there was really high winds and rain and I still went out - I just wrapped up and made sure my son was waterproofed in his pram! Going back to work was a lifeline for me and suddenly I enjoyed life again

That said, if you suspect PND defo go and speak to your GP. Theres no shame in it